bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №132579
 24.08.2016
xxx congratulates yyy on her birthday

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
YYY: Better babblow... butterfly then will apply!

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №132578
 24.08.2016
Why are you so attached to Kilidor, Rizette and Babenton? As if you had no gangsters in your childhood.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №132577
 24.08.2016
Belcantante: It would still be great to name the store "Stolen". People will be drawn to it - because it is clear that things there should be cheap and high quality.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №132576
 24.08.2016
who are constantly whispering here about bad roads, nonexistent medicine and the lack of urban grants.
///
a) the roads are fully paid by transportation tax, not by wage taxes;
b) I was personally in a state medical institution in 2001 (certificate when working - there was not paid) and in 2010 (similarly);
I don’t use the kindergarten and I’m not interested.
And because of the above, I personally will go on, because I see no sense in paying taxes for the yachts and planes of our officials. And the saved funds are much easier for me to spend on pension, without the mediation of good uncle from the PFR.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №132575
 24.08.2016
For a long time, I noticed that it has become fashionable to wrap up jeans, wrinkle ankles. When will it be fashionable to wear jeans rubbed to holes between the legs? I have a good collection.)

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №132574
 24.08.2016
I go home. Meeting a man:

What kind of city is this?

and Yekaterinburg

... again...?! to

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №132573
 24.08.2016
I am studying at the Civil Aviation Academy. Once upon a time, this story happened to our group. In a couple, the new prede decided to joke and awaken the Mongol sitting next to me, who was holding his head with his hand. Quietly crawled, showed everyone "tssss", we are silent, the paddle leaned to him to scream in the ear. “I am not sleeping!” “My eyes are like that,” he added.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №132572
 24.08.2016
“Well, sorry... I thought we were a free country, in which two men have the right, by mutual consent, to fill each other’s mouths.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №132571
 23.08.2016
I was kidnapped by aliens. I remember only a dull light, some buttons, movement up...
“Don’t worry, we took you drunk in the elevator.


[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №132570
 23.08.2016
And you've noticed that the "sows" are very correct, caring and careful about the "crabs" when they fall asleep early.
Silence, people... Well the man is asleep. We cover the blanket.

And how wickedly and frankly, they behave in a shamish manner with regard to the "sows" who sleep peacefully until noon!
Aahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah! Rise up! Thus the whole life goes on! How much can I sleep??? I am a flyer!! to

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №132569
 23.08.2016
xxx: well, I can find my leg without any problems in the ralph or the columbian, but the fucking to give 4000 for the keys for the summer I fucked in my mouth

Do you cut your nails?

XXX: and suddenly ice=)

Fucking in the summer?

xxx: we are in the sea = (((

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №132568
 23.08.2016
A few years ago I wrote a program for a medical center. Its essence is that by a combination of symptoms it gives a method of treatment. There really was the resemblance of a neural network for learning, but I’m not sure they’re using it. This is all you need to know about paid medicine.
_ _ _
I’m a doctor, and I’ll tell you, a young man, that’s how they treat the world. Because finding a competent doctor to compile a list of symptoms for a particular method of treatment once and for a long time is easier than finding a little-small competent sculptor in every Zadruchin village. simply in the same States instead of the program it was initially implemented in the form of the Talmud - but also with the model on the theory of the graphs if a - then b, and if c - then d".

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №132567
 23.08.2016
Working ants and bees are all babies. The male sex appeared simply as an evolutionary stage of development. It is not necessary for reproduction. Just like him.

You don’t go to biology next year.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №132566
 23.08.2016
If a cat doesn’t sleep at night and tries to sing songs to you and call you on a bustling playground, there’s an aphigenic way to translate it into a daytime existence.
Hang out of the window, and more. In the morning you feed it with seeds to the edges, in the evening when you come from work you have a tired cat. Checked on several "night predators". It acts inexorably. But you need to know the measure, to stop in time, or the cat will move through the phase.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №132565
 23.08.2016
A 25-year-old patient came to the ultrasound with complaints of pulling pain in the lower abdomen, delay.

Doctor, I have an inflammation. See also. Without ultrasound treatment is not prescribed.

Have you done the test?

What a test? It is 100% inflammatory. It was already so. - In my practice, such patients have already met, so I just sneaked.

I do ultrasound silently: 9 weeks of pregnancy. Turn the monitor to the patient.

Well here, look at it. Hands, legs, head and heart are beating. He looks carefully and thoughtfully.

This is what? Am I pregnant?

Well yes. I say at least 2 months.

- Doctor, can the inflammation on the ultrasound look like this? The girl speaks with hope.

Oh yeah.. Everything happens, of course, but I’ll write that you’re 9 weeks pregnant.

is dressed. I give the stream.

No doctor, you are wrong. I’ll make an uzi somewhere else.

has gone. No more came. Probably healed inflammation.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №132564
 23.08.2016
On a local news site in Novosibirsk news: "The YABLOOK activist was broken his nose when he was protecting the personal data of those who signed for the cancellation of the Yarova package." In the photo, a strong intelligent guy looks into the eyes of a bullshit. The first comment:
It’s great when a smart man can even put on a bucket.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №132563
 23.08.2016
Delivery of goods to customers at the address

Where do you want to take?

K – Village “Such”

Aha, I know

k - There is a stop "Pharmacy" and next to "Council"

It was, I know

K – So, in front of the council there is a monument to Lenin, so he points his finger straight to our house.

and o_0! ! to ! to

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №132562
 23.08.2016
I love the South. We swim with a friend on a mattress in the sea. The sea is clean, the meduses swim down. The friend decided to hang out, dive, kissed the medusa, well, and she answered him. I rub, he closes his lips, tears in his eyes. We sailed to the shore, ran to the rescue post, asked what to do? What can you help? Well what do you think... Their answer is to suck in a burnt place. I’ve never seen tears in my eyes of pain and laughter at the same time.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №132561
 23.08.2016
In Scotland, the penguin conducted a military inspection and received the title of General.

They smoke hardly. Surprisingly, the news is not from the Netherlands or Colombia.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №132560
 23.08.2016
Damn very smart.
Do not be sad:

>>The shooting of the show "Destroyers of Legends", watched the last series, sadly

Open a physics textbook for 6th grade, you will learn a lot of new things. Half of the legends are broken down in 5 minutes of computing.

Who doesn’t care about those legends? The main thing in the show is not that, but the explosions and destruction!

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