bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №8369
 31.07.2008
RN~na (00:56:07 31/07/2008)
Imagine a girl standing in front of you at the bed or on what you are lying there, she has a white semi-transparent shirt that is long but there is nothing underneath. She is just in a blouse on her naked body and nothing of her clothes is worn anymore. She is tall with light hair very slim and beautiful and opposite behind her a window through which the moonlight goes. And here he shows you the contours of her body through the blouse... she slowly stretches it out, at the same time putting her foot on the bed and then, button after button, and rearranging her slicked long legs, goes on the bed to you, and then, having already dropped the blouse on the floor, sits on you from the top and smoots you on the forehead.
Fak (00:59:19 31/07/2008)
Give it more! “Thumbs Up”
RN~na (00:59:55 31/07/2008)
Well, and then she cheeks you on the forehead, and says with a gentle baritone: I love you so much. Turn your back to me, let me massage you and you turn in the expectation of the massage... and here, she sits on you and makes the massage, and then suddenly you feel that she stands up and it turns out to be not a girl but a guy with long hair and a female-like appearance that you took in the dark for a female figure. He sits on you above and you on his back.and [
Fak (01:01:52 31/07/2008)
Tell a good story for a night with a normal end.
RN~na (01:04:42 31/07/2008)
Well, the guy you took for a girl, this was a normal ending.

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №8368
 31.07.2008
In the winter we had a fun "sitting". She comes home drunk in the wood, her parents tell her to go for a walk with the dog, she barely pronounces words and goes out on the street. I sat down on the bench to smoke and cut off) After an hour I woke up from the fact that my parents were out of the window, pray to go home already.
I’ll wait for the dog.
Parents: You are drunk, dog as half an hour already at home!! to

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №8367
 31.07.2008
I was disappointed in anal sex.
YYY: What did you do?
XH: Yes
XH: No
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!]:->

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №8366
 31.07.2008
– is
Marina (13:56:24 30/07/2008)
Hi to you!

– is
Gunter IzzyTM (13:57:49 30/07/2008)
Authorization refused

– is
Marina (13:59:11 30/07/2008)
I hate you too :)

– is
Marina (13:59:54 30/07/2008)
What are you doing?

– is
Marina (14:04:38 30/07/2008)
Why not authorize?

– is
Marina (14:09:37 30/07/2008)
Okay, you probably don’t get messages, then get it! If you are a tech programmer then you are most likely a pimples with long hair, which do not give girls, girls do not give here and acne, and I am very beautiful and smart, and I have no equals, well, well again about you. It seems like you prefer the Germans, but the Izzi console embarrasses you, are you circumcised? If circumcised means a Tatar or a Jew, Jews I cannot tolerate, some are rude and greedy, the Tatars are too cunning. :D You do not fit me! Well all! Go naked, Pedras I kiss you sun!

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №8365
 31.07.2008
YYY : Aha Another brother asked why the pops are bad. How can the ambassador respond?

XXX is 1. The propaganda of an easy way of life, inspires the illusion that in life everything is given easily and without problems.
The primitive musical component, in fact, comes to the forefront, about musicians are simply forgotten
Uniformity of the text component
The best singer is the singer with the largest breasts, not the strongest voice.
5 is not trouble.

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №8364
 31.07.2008
and joyful:
I went home by bus. I give 50 rubles.
Aunt breaks the ticket and begins to look for a delivery.
He gives me thirty rubles with something, says that he lacks money to give me a ticket, breaks me another ticket and leaves.

[ + 61 - ] Comment quote №8363
 31.07.2008
Cancer > You burned up in the morning!! to
Katerina > What happened?
Cancer > Why did you put me in the corridor?
Katerina > What did I do? O_O
Cancer > In the morning I got up, looking on the floor in the hallway, the cockroach lying. I was shocked, but I removed it.
Katerina > an idiot!!! This was a rubber sausage for your favorite dog, I bought it in the zoo shop yesterday!!! to
Cancer > Eyeyeyee... Was Figley in the shape of a cockroach? O_O
Katerina > You are a fool!!! to
Cancer > And I still thought in the morning. It seems that you have a higher philological education, with a red diploma, the word bad from you never heard, as if not even once cracked at me, and then once and shouted straight in the corridor!!! and ROFL
Katerina > Well you give!!! and ROFL
Cancer > Blue... I washed her in the toilet for 20 minutes, she’s popping up all the time... I squeezed her... *ROFL*
Katerina > RJunemagu!!! to

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №8362
 31.07.2008
I woke up in the morning with a dog licking my heel.
YYY: So what?
I don’t have a dog...

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №8361
 31.07.2008
XXX: relatively "adjusted", there was somehow a case that I was like with the local president and his guard, because they were driving loud and bitter, then I went for them with pleasure, so it was more convenient to overtake all in a row, but they apparently strained and the escort car, which was driving first ahead first missed Audi forward, and then the gun interfered with me, but did not stop at all, so they slightly lowered the speed and went on with him not 140, but 120, then Audi went somewhere in the side ", and I went on, but thanks to the guys jumped ten kilometers in a very reverse rhythm...

YYY: What will happen if the President of the Russian Federation is in such a position?

ZZZ: You will see Khodorkovsky alive.

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №8360
 31.07.2008
by R
I have always loved blondes.

other
I am a blonde, but in my heart.

by R
When do you get out of your soul?

other
I tortured

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №8359
 31.07.2008
Yesterday I saw the poster: Stas Pieha, Edita Pieha, Ilona Bronevitskaya concert...
Even the little Timati rides on tour alone, and the poor Stasik with his mother and grandmother))

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №8358
 31.07.2008
In order not to have frequent divorces, it is not enough to live soul in soul. We need to live and body.

In the body.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №8357
 31.07.2008
My old friend told me. In the early 1990s, it was not bad.

He travelled to Finland and worked on a strawberry plantation.

and Huthor. They paid, at that time, very badly, the master kind, and around

Many miles away from a single soul. The forest, the lake is a fairy tale. and was at

The owner’s son named Yoko. With this Yoko they were strongly associated, and then

Worked with him in the garage. There was an old Ford there for a long time.

No longer on the move, but the guys set the goal of bringing him to feel. and here,

One day it happened! The car crashed! This is their affair.

decided to mark in the bar of the neighboring village, 15 kilometers from the hut.

Drunk driving in Finland, of course, is punished much harder than

We were there, but the area, I repeat, was completely deserted.

No one stopped them. They arrived safely at the bar.

They washed well there, and were going to go back... But it wasn’t here – Ford

He said, “Byr-bir, chik-chik...” and I stung, apparently now forever. What

Drunk they got to the phone automate (mobile phones,

I didn’t know then, and I called my father. Half an hour later he arrived.

On my tractor. Returned Yoko to the side, - not very, meters to 5, and

I began to say something to him. As my friend told me, it wasn’t.

I hear it very quietly, my father said. Both of them stood like pines.

My father’s lips are moving. Then they attached Ford to the tractor, themselves.

He got into the car, and Dad started to pull them. Yoko is turning, and

His eyes opened and he said, “Listen, my father was so angry! I am him

I have never seen such!“...

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №8356
 31.07.2008
A couple bought a robot-educator with a built-in lie detector.

I decided to try it. Her son has just come from school.

Where have you been? Asked my father.

“I was late at school,” the son replied. The robot answered.

The undercover.

and ah! My father said enough. Now tell the truth!

My friends and I watched porn.

“Look,” said the father, hanging his son another backbone,

Parents should always tell the truth. For example, I never lied.

to their parents!

The robot approaches his father and hangs him two spells, and such as that one.

He barely stood on his feet. My mother, laughing, said to me:

Be gentle with him, after all, he’s your son!

The robot silently strikes her in the jaw.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №8355
 31.07.2008
I thought about it while I was cooking:
Russia for Russians! Moscow for the Russians! Scenes for VINAMPA!

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №8354
 31.07.2008
The xxx:
What did you write to me yesterday?

YYYY :
xxx, I am not at home, status 'is gone' this is magnificently confirmed. I will read all your messages as soon as I come home.
ZY: Choose expressions, maybe my parents on the computer.

The xxx:
The parents!! Your son is an idiot!!! to

YYYY :
We know.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №8353
 31.07.2008
What did he drink?
by Pino
Pino is beer + wine.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №8352
 31.07.2008
happened to me recently. During the repair, a tube with glue had to be opened, and it, scuco, does not open. I had a scalpel in my closet with which I opened this glue. Then I decided to wash the scalpel. He went to the bathroom, washed it, and decided to squeeze (sunset combined). At that moment my father came into the castle. Picture with oil: I, in one hand a scalpel, in the other, I stand over the push. And I didn’t find anything smarter in my throat than to grasp:"I just wanted to wash it..."

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №8351
 30.07.2008
Grizzly
Placebo is how?
JH
Do you know what this is? With door, 4 seats
Grizzly
Yes Yes
JH
so the plackaart is a coupe without a door, and on the contrary, two more shelves across.
Grizzly
understood
JH
quite normal.. only when you walk through the car.. in general, you will remember the illusory phrase "in my mouth my legs" repeatedly

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №8350
 30.07.2008
We had a message about the company.
There are working conditions:
Favorable working conditions:
Technically high-quality workplaces in the office
Access to email and Internet
the possibility of communication on the site "one class" from 13:00 to 14:00;

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna