Let’s say the case was in Bradenburg, in the artillery part of the western group of troops. A lieutenant from the other side calls the lieutenant and tells him that by lunch the Germans will bring the elephants out of the local zoo. Before arrival, all the new secret machines must be wiped, regulators displayed, and elephants washed. And turned up.
Our lieutenant calls the warehouse with a request to hand out the masking grid. and receives rejection. Call the commander of the company, say the Germans will come, you need to give a masking net. He says, I’ll handle the warehouse, get it.
All the cars were covered and disguised. The call in the row of regulators, and now they are standing at the crossroads in white helmets waiting.
There are no elephants. Then our lieutenant recruits the chief of the unit, so and so, everything is ready, where are the elephants? The Elephants? The boss asks, “Are you all drunk?” I will come now.
Upon arrival, listening to the report and realizing that this is a joke, the boss says: - What a washing machine, -5° on the street, the water has frozen. Call the neighbors, they have warm hangars, let them wash there.
Another year one of my favorite toasts was "for clean elephants".

To the words of his wife “All, I leave you!!!” The young man begins to ask forgiveness, the experienced silently survives hysteria, and the former sadly says, "You only promise!"

We are talking about creating our game.
Rinat: And we may call the game "RASL" ))) Rinat, Alexander, Semen, Leonid
Rinat: Or “Rinat”: Rinat and the Hardest Adequate Types
Or is it better to crack?
Rinat: Okay, you can put the letter C in the first place)
Alexander: It’s all simple – Rinat Sral.
I am leaving the team.

No, I’ve seen everything, but when a person, in order to get to the Downloads folder, opens a Web browser, downloads a file and chooses the option “open the folder”... That’s, you understand, the way he’s sure!

<Natalia>For some reason I have recently recalled the phrase that I read in an article of one university there (it was about a scholarship for a certain category of students):
"If you are orphan, disabled or just talented..."

A "adult" boredom for which to watch cartoons is a taboo for an adult - go all into the forest

– is

These are usually between 10 and 18. It’s at this age that people are too adults to watch cartoons. Then the painful desire to be an adult disappears :)

"In the UAE, a man died from a horse bite, a case was initiated".

If a horse bite me, I would have died.

She is a worm!
No, no, no protein

Yascher: I would kill for these super-original jokes.
Yascher: If I need a "protein" and I go and buy a half-kilogram of worms, then maybe I will argue about the presence of cherries in the purchased bulk.
Yascher: And buying cherries, fucking, I want to see (and eat) cherries too!

Something friendliner entirely suffered, sandals now also only gay wear, it turns out. God is burning.

> In the cabbage found, but the donkey brought?

by Ali Aist. Free delivery is now even faster.

The Virgin:

Because in sex a woman should never be older than a man even for a day. It is axiom.

Boy... it’s better to go and have sex with your dominant hand. Don’t teach dad to fuck.

One of my acquaintances went home on the subway after a party at work. Arriving in the subway he prepared to go to his native "Kyivskaya" on the ring. Well, since the state is warm - accordingly, you need to sit down and hang out. And through the dream, he thus hears a monotonous female voice saying:

- Be careful, the doors are closing, the next station "Octoberskaya".

The thought in my head is, “through one out.” The eyes closed. After a while, through a dream, he hears the same monotonous female voice repeating:

- Be careful, the doors are closing, the next station "Octoberskaya".

The thought: "It was necessary to eat and sleep a whole ring! No need to sleep!! “” Without opening his eyes, he begins to wake up. But "going" to the next station he hears the same outrageous voice, which once again warns him that:

- Be careful, the doors are closing, the next station "Octoberskaya".

After realizing that he is tired of order, he decides, by an effort of will, to open his eyes and with surprise finds himself on the platform of the station "Dobryninskaya", sitting on the bench.

After 40 years:

(I) - I remember when I was young, it was a hot summer, +40 in the shade...

Grandfather, you’ve gotten your stories! Better take the straw and throw the strawberries into the oven! July is not a joke.

The man listened to his mother and on the 7th ++ year of marriage did a DNA test. The child is not his. A scandal, a divorce, a demonstrative knock on the door and leaving a wicked girl with her hollow behind. The woman, looking at this unnecessary, also did a DNA test. The child is not her. During further excavations it was discovered that the mistake in the nursery was confused. Nothing changed, the child remained living with his mother, and the father who tried to return was sent to an erotic walk. This is how a man did not exchange a faithful wife and a happy family for a whore. Happy end.

here

Oh! Oh! The companion is back! Probably I wrote that I graduated?

He went to visit his daughter.

Muscle memory is sometimes surprising. I had a mailbox 13 years ago on a Russian service, but access to it was long lost because I did not remember the password, and the answer to a secret question was the IMEI of a long-lost phone. He then registered a new box, the name of which differs from the previous one only by the presence of a point in one place. After 13 years, I still go to my new mailbox, without thinking, I enter the login and password on the machine and logged in, I see that something is wrong. I look up and see that before me appeared an abandoned mailbox 13 years ago, but the password I still do not remember and could not repeat this trick again, but at least the old mail read))

Bill Gates, the richest man in the world, does not hesitate to drink water obtained from the processing of feces.A pilot station for the processing of feces was installed in Dakar, Senegal, in 2015. Gates himself in his blog described the process of obtaining water. “I watched how the feces went through the conveyor into a large reservoir, where the process of purification took place. They evaporated the water and then recycled it. In a few minutes, I was able to estimate the final result: a glass of pure, delicious water,” said the billionaire.

The first comment: The man who created the Windows Millennium and Vistu should only drink the water of the shit.

(Well, if you are lazy and don’t have a job.) And you know, the most precious hour and a half is better spent on sex than watching dumb cartoons for 5-year-olds.

Human, it is not funny. I don’t have and I hope never will have a job. Because I value myself, not money. Because I have enough money for everything. And lazy, you probably still have not learned a profitable profession. Those same 1.5 hours, my husband and I will decide what to spend. And any interference in someone else’s life and interests is a distinctive feature of bead. And the limitation of the interests of eating and sleeping is a distinctive feature of the lower segments of the population.

The Investigative Committee revealed the murder of the head of the Sergiyev Posad, Yevgeny Duško, who was shot dead on August 22, 2011. According to the SC, the murder was committed by a gang with whose head Duško had a conflict.

It took him six years to establish that the murder was committed by a gang with which he had a conflict. In a couple of years, it will be established that the cause of death could have been... I don’t even know... a bullet?

When I was a child, I thought that the rain worms in the rain are generally dirty. They come out to the surface and are pleased with the opportunity to crawl on the fields. It turns out that they just got a pipe.