bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №116893
 04.08.2015
About the advertisement where a girl doesn’t want to fly to Rome with a cup of coffee. It is understandable. But the dialogue between the girl and her coffee shop makes you think, and does Rome need her at all?

[ + 22 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №116892
 04.08.2015
In the car for travel purposes always lies a small kitchen scissor in the blanket.
On the weekend, they went out in nature, cut vegetables with this knife, and when they arrived, together with the rest of the dishes, they accidentally brought it into the house. Without a cover.

In the morning, I found nothing safer than to take it to the car, directing it sharply down and tightly pressing it to the chest.

By the way, there is a very harmful grandfather living in our entrance. Rise " with cockroaches" Go to bed late. For many years, all citizens have been bothered by their own law.

So here I go so beautiful... In a dress in peaches, in barefoot. The sun shines in my eyes - I smile... the knife to the nerds pressed...

And the grandfather goes to meet... And, as often happens, he takes a step in the strain, and I go in the same direction, he goes in the other, and I...

You would see this face distorted by the feeling of imminent retribution!

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №116891
 04.08.2015
With Laura:

Q: # dd if=/dev/zero of=/dev/sdd
dd: writing to ‘/dev/sdd’: No space left on device
What does it mean?

A: There is not enough space for all /dev/zero content, try using compression, the zeros should compress well. somehow so:
# dd if=/dev/zero, xz -9e, dd of=/dev/sdd

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №116890
 04.08.2015
14:04:04 xxx:
I drank coffee in the morning.)

14:04:16 yyy:
The morning was an hour ago.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №116889
 04.08.2015
here here :

Today I reviewed my old school diaries and understood what I still learned from the time spent in school :)
Note from the diary of the 7th grade: 'Trying to run on the wall'
Note from the diary of 9th grade: 'Run through the walls'
= is

My cat runs through the walls. It would be fun to see you run in a couple.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №116888
 04.08.2015
This is:

And not only. I, for example, know one paid clinic, where they take specifically in appearance. The physician-man there must be majestically noble, such a professor - a secular lion, doctors-women can be taken in full composition on a yacht around the world in one bikini, a massager and the one like from a bodybuilder competition. True, and in terms of qualification, things are very and very decent.

Interested, but the name can be known?

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №116887
 04.08.2015
Reference to IPB:

Dignity
It arranged absolutely everything. Well held the voltage leaps and 15 minutes held without a socket computer (Intel core i5 with power unit at 650) with a 23 inch monitor and 2 external hards in video rendering mode. Silent ventilator but it is only when it starts and in battery mode so it is not critical. Disconnected sound from the button.

shortcomings
It exploded after a year and a half (((((

Commentary
A good IP.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №116886
 04.08.2015
After reading the description of the film "Man of ants", the question torments me. The costume does not have a colour collection. So if a person needs to go out of great need, he will have to do it out. Does this mean that the result of the need, having been out of the costume, will take the natural volumes of the human pile and there will be a chance to face the ants, which has resembled the pile in times and in orders greater than its volume and weight?

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №116885
 04.08.2015
I will continue to live in Alternative Reality.
I bought a phone for my 12 year old daughter. She is offered a smartphone, some other sensory nonsense. My lady's reaction: "I would use it a little bit, so that it't break and fit in the pocket. " In response to the question of the seller "why not the cooler phone chose?", she replied: "in simplicity is perfection!"
Now I wondered, was it not in vain that I read her Chinese philosophers in her early childhood?

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №116884
 04.08.2015
I fear that there will inevitably come a day when technology will outperform simple human communication. And the world will have a generation of idiots.

by Albert Einstein

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №116883
 04.08.2015
From the discussion of dogs feeding tigers.
XHH: It will be interesting when it catches like a dog.
WOW: It can be. At least he will try.
My cat was raised by my dog (the cat gave birth and died in a week, we fed three kittens out of a pipette, then gave two and one remained). From March to June, the cat was not released from the house. And then he went out, saw the neighbor’s cat and tried to beat him. It sounded like this (fast-fast): "me-me-me-me"
It should have been heard.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №116882
 03.08.2015

The cult of children arose in our civilization not so long ago – just some 50-60 years ago. And in many ways it is the same artificial phenomenon as the Coca-Cola Santa Claus jumping out of the tobacco market every year. Children are the most powerful tool to boost the race of consumption. Every square centimeter of a child’s body, not to mention the cubic millimeters of the soul, has long been divided between the producers of goods and services. Forcing a person to love himself with such manic love is still a rather difficult moral and ethical task. The love of the child comes from the middle. Then just turn the counter on.
The market does not want the family to be built properly, because then it will satisfy most of its needs itself, within itself. And the unhappy family likes to outsource their problems. And this habit has long been the foundation for billions of dollars in industries. The ideal, from the point of view of the market, the father is not someone who will spend the weekend with the child, go to the park, ride a bike. The ideal father is someone who will work overtime this weekend to earn a two-hour visit to the water park.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №116881
 03.08.2015
xxx: I came to the UFMS with the bats, that they would be struck on me and because they did not come on the appointed day and time for the passport.
YYY: Are you driving Batty to change his passport and listening to insults for his bats? Did you think you could be your grandmother?
XXX is grandmother.
Yyy: Yes, his grandmother, his mother.
XXX: Give up such a child.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №116880
 03.08.2015
"LANfran-LANfra" - a song about the laying of network cables
Do you know what Boyarski puts the cables in?
ZZZ: in the mouth
No, it is on cable channels.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №116879
 03.08.2015
xxxx: A PTO engineer was jailed for a computer found in the closet - 96 MB of operating equipment, HR...
How it works, I do not understand.
YYYY: It is Magic
xxxx: Ah, the necromancy is called)))

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №116878
 03.08.2015
Do you not understand that your principle is our killed and wounded people? What do we think of each person? What is this confession putting the cross on the Russian propaganda about fascists? What did you stupidly ruin relations with the former friendly people?
— — —
Yes, we destroyed our relations with the friendly people. Here I am, and my old mother, and the child is a year old... And the aunt from Ukraine doesn’t call us anymore, because she also thinks that it’s all of us, fools and fools. My own person, haha. Maybe among the Russians and little adequate, but judging by such positions among Ukrainians there are not at all.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №116877
 03.08.2015
Windows 10 is Spying on Users
WOW: Yeah yeah
HH: So, taking the opportunity, I greet the employees of the small-heavy!!! to

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №116876
 03.08.2015
This is not the story in the Terminator. It needed to be this: Sarah Connor and Kyle rice are transferred in 2017, and here is the OP! The governor of California.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №116875
 03.08.2015
– – – – –
The Russian government has authorized the destruction of products illegally imported into Russia by any available means.
and...
Could it be possible to involve children in this case?

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №116874
 03.08.2015
Better this way:

In the parallel universe:

Yesterday Russian language and literature teacher Anatoly Belkin was once again noticed near the entrance to an elite nightclub. This time it is that he approached him on his already new black bendley.

Meanwhile, it became known from the Moscow dynamo that the young and promising footballer Alexander Petukhov signed a new contract with the club on very favorable terms for himself. Now he will receive 600 thousand rubles per season, and as bonuses he will be provided with free three-time meals and an annual subscription to the fitness center.

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