bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №69433
 02.09.2012
Discussion of the new smartphone on the Hubble:
xxx: I may not understand something, but the aluminum body, resistant to scratches, is about what?
This is for porn lovers.
Zzz: And in the iPad, forgive me, is it absorbing? and :-)

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №69432
 02.09.2012
by Daria:
In four hours I must get up and in six hours I will speak to my first-class alma-mater. What can I wish them from my soul?
Don’t shut up the day before! ?

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №69431
 02.09.2012
From SMS mail:

Hi, sorry for not answering, there was no network on the road.
X: Oh, I was worried about you, or I was worried about you.
Yyy: Thank you, of course, but I can chew my teeth for now.

[ + 42 - ] [5 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №69430
 02.09.2012
Today, on September 1, for the first time in all my time at school, there were three pops on the line, who read our speech, sang prayers for ten minutes, and finally walked through the ranks of schoolchildren, sprinkling on us with holy water. Not a fuck? Where are we turning? The children came to the temple of science and knowledge, crazy.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №69429
 02.09.2012
I dreamed this morning that I was getting married to you, in a short dress, broken ballets and construction gloves spotted in bitumen. I woke up with the thoughts: 1) No one should ever know about this, 2) I will not change my name.

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №69428
 02.09.2012
I really like hiring announcements like "The freight service requires drivers with their a/m". I look forward to the soon appearance of vacancies of workers with their machines, machinery workers with their trains and oil workers with their tower.

[ + 39 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №69427
 02.09.2012
Bluejeans: I would like to know Christ’s opinion about the Russian Orthodox Church and, in general, about the Church – Orthodox, Catholic, Protestant... Whether they were, in general, intended or predestined by them. This is very similar to infringement of copyright.

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №69426
 02.09.2012
XXX is fun in the city.
YYY?
xxx yesterday went out at the wrong stop, immediately got into the jungle
I think I’ll go home on foot. Ohha! In 15 minutes, I wore red saliva.
YYY the hoops?
XXX is black. Somehow left there.

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №69425
 02.09.2012
About 11 p.m. under the window flew a garbage car, from the matyuhalnik (for the entire quarter) was first "Control of communication" and then, with the same voice, "Nihua is loud".

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №69424
 02.09.2012
From Habr:
In my old work, computers in the network called the names of girls (Natasha, Tamara, Light, etc.). It was quite comfortable. But in the end, the deputy director heard the conversation of the administrators: "Serog, come to the deputy director, there Natasha fell and doesn't want to get up. Maybe he has a virus.”

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №69423
 02.09.2012
Tanya: I liked it so much: To prove his love to her, he climbed the highest mountains, crossed the deepest rivers and crossed the widest deserts... She left him. He was never home.

Anna: ha) I would show Goche, but he is not at home today )))))))))))))))))

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №69422
 02.09.2012
Samabs: Recently, the pop asked to pay for church utensils – cadilla-panicilla candlesticks-lamps and so on. I got into the topic. Church crafts are made in the workshops belonging to one side of the church. Does the church sell it all for our money? That means I had to say to my customers at the time - guys, go to the store for me, and I will sell you in it. Strong somehow.

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №69421
 02.09.2012
The xxx:
We change the asphalt everywhere. I go out of the store and see this picture:
A skateboard runs, the asphalt that has just been laid, suddenly stalls, stops at the light on red! It is green, he is gone. I think something is wrong here, I look at the sides - I see mints in the bushes stand and write out some head in an orange penalty.
Now the workers are afraid to break, szuco :)

YYYY :
Lol, they would still be deprived of the rights of the person who paints it :D

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №69420
 02.09.2012
Q: Did you see, Denchik, has been walking in the same balloon for 4 years?
WOW : Yes. I also saw the photo.
WOW: And they have not changed much: neither Dench nor Balakhon))
The day is fine.
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
He is watching for himself.)

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №69419
 02.09.2012
I have a thought, and I think of it.

I cannot be measured in half!! I am whole!

Great Soviet cartoon

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №69418
 02.09.2012
The more we love a woman, the less chances others have!

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №69417
 02.09.2012
I read it on one of the popular alchemy websites.

English for Euro. of Donetsk.
Reanimation doctors from the Kalinin Hospital told a story, I reproduce by memory.
In the hospital, an ambulance received a patient - a young Englishman with a wild poisoning. The thirsty young man was trying to go into a deep coma all the time, but our doctors did not let compatriot John Youse die from eating in the city created directly by Youse. Returned the guy to the quarter-finals literally three steps to the light at the end of the tunnel. The Englishman came to himself, looked around and, not noticing St. Peter, was dirty.
The boy went to the supermarket and said shit!! and Ochrenel. He has never seen such an abundance of alcohol at the price of 5-10 euros. He has also never seen such a quantity of red caviar, which is prohibited as food in the Kingdom. Go here, there would be money.
And he had – 70 pounds in hryvnia equivalent. He went on. Buying 5 bottles of "white" and 1 kg of red caviar, the Englishman arranged a holiday in honor of English football. And he ate in English too: he drank a glass of vodka and... drank it with a glass of red caviar. Then the cycle repeated.
On the fifth bottle and the fourth bowl of caviar, his gastrointestinal tract leaked. Donetsk doctors in the image of Archangel Gabriel returned the poor to the sinful land.
not for long.
The day after, the ambulance returned the man. With the same signs and watermelon smell everywhere. Losing consciousness, the Englishman politely greeted the already familiar resuscitationists and went to the nirvana. He was hardly drawn from there, he had already seen the Buddha and his singing elephants. Influencing in the English cane enema, doctors advised to switch to at least a separate diet - not to interfere with a kilogram of protein with liters of alcohol.
The Anglo-Saxons understood it. I realized.
A day later, he returned to the hospital as a prince in an ambulance car, surrounded by a white-colored paja. According to him, before the beginning of a new life he decided to mark the end of the old.
The resuscitation brigade roared in the whole voice. Especially when the Englishman said to the doctor, “Hello, Sasha!” and whispered. On the anniversary, the third in a week, the washing of the stomach ran to watch even from the morgue.
Especially rejoiced everyone the desire of the awakened Englishman to learn how to transfer the money for treatment to the hospital. Having learned that we had free medicine, the Englishman tried for the fourth time to fall into a coma.
Answered... ©

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №69416
 02.09.2012
If you can’t choose one of two men, choose the other. Because if you really loved the first, the second would not have appeared.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №69415
 02.09.2012
The xxx:
It is boring, fucking
I hope you come tomorrow.
The xxx:
The parents of the mosquito found it.
The xxx:
And yes, the last two messages are not related to HDD.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №69414
 02.09.2012
Posts by VK
Lisha, my sweet one! I want your name!! to
And three more children!! to
To introduce a family member?? to

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna