bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №141653
 25.05.2017
to this
XX: No one will call them haishniks anymore.
YYY: How do you tell me...
There was a City Society of Conspiracy in Moscow. by GOP. A century and a half. There is no society, the hoops remain.
Moscow Criminal Investigation in Moscow. The Muss. A century and a half. There is no rubbish, there is rubbish.
There was a state inspection in Moscow.

The State Housing of the Proletariat (PLO), which was transformed from the State Society of the Horror (there were brought childless children who "industrialized" with hooliganism and theft). The same building was located on Ligovka (Ligovsky Prospect in SPB). The area was famous for its banditism and moral destruction of the contingent. Not to disinformation #Basheducational

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №141652
 25.05.2017
My husband was washing in the bathroom on the second floor (private house). He was locked up in the castle, and he was enchanted. I couldn’t open it from the outside or from the inside. He had to go out the window (there is no difficulty, on the roof of the veranda).

That same evening, the neighbor told his husband in a conspiracy tone that he had seen a coward escaping from our window.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №141651
 25.05.2017
Clan99: Every website has its own price. I understand that Flibusta is not sold, but still, purely for the sake of interest: how much can objectively cost Flibusta? How do you hurt?

Sergey York: up to 15 years in prison

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №141650
 25.05.2017
Building a high school in the temple. I walk around the territory, with me a girl of five years of age, somewhere behind her mom goes.
The girl asked me, “Who are you?
I am an electrician.
Girl: I am a man!
The electricists are no longer people, sadness...
Mother shouts to the girl: Don’t stick to people!
Fuchs are people.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №141649
 25.05.2017
xxx: In hell there will be a personal boiler for those who insert comments of the kind: "Yes, here I do work for 5 minutes. Go to the factory, he will drink you a bottle."

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №141648
 25.05.2017
Unmatched socks and unmatched socks.
Here at one of my acquaintances in the depths of the closet is stored a healthy such a box with unparalleled shoes. Orphans are lying, waiting, suddenly finding a couple

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №141647
 25.05.2017
I am kind to him, with the epithet, as you taught him.
WOW: this is exactly, with the epithet, and not the most successful.
I should have been with Pieter.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №141646
 25.05.2017
I come home, I go to the bathroom and here my wife is like out of the kitchen: - Don't touch the barrel! I almost jumped. I say, there is a lady. Allow me to join?
It turned out that the little one had already closed up in the bathroom three times today. He liked it. It cannot be opened, the silence is lacking.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №141645
 25.05.2017
Never pursue happiness, go to meet happiness.

[ + 34 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №141644
 25.05.2017
"Would nail make of these people, there would not be in the world stronger than nails." Silence is #2.

I have already written about the brave Sheriff Elfego Bak. Unfortunately he died more than 70 years ago, but there are still men in this world with steel eggs and no fear in the eyes who are ready to protect and even do the LAW, even if they do not require it. Meet Bishna Schresta, the hero of our time.

There are several ethnic groups in remote Nepal (magar, gurung, and others). They are called by one name, Gurkish. At first glance, they are small, dull, vanilla little people. So small that even in the army introduced a parameter for them, only those who weigh more than 50 kg and more than 1m57cm of height can serve. But don't be mistaken, they are one of the best soldiers in the world.

For 200 years, the Gurks have been the elite troops of the British Empire. Serving in the army for them is a matter of honor and so far every year about 30,000 gurks claim to vacant 200 seats in the British troops. They also serve in their native Nepal, India, and several other countries. They don’t know the words of things like retreating, giving up, and not fulfilling orders. From their battle cry "Hai Mahakali, Ajo Gorhali" (Glory to the Great Kali, Going Gurki) the enemies tremble. During the Second World War, even the fearless Japanese preferred to surrender to the mercy of the victor than to come together in a handballing battle with the gurks. Field Marshal Sam Bahadur once said, “Show me one who is not afraid of death, and I will show you a liar... or a gourd.” There are legends about their courage, but what happened is a lie.

On September 2, 2010, the retired capral, Gurk Bishnu Shrest, got on the train at Ranchi station. The train travelled peacefully through the jungle of Chitaranjan in West Bengal and Bishnu slept peacefully. At about 12 a.m., the train crashed and stopped. The passengers of the demand could not even understand what was happening, but unfortunately it did not last long. A few minutes later, the wagon was seized by robbers armed with pistols, knives, and even swords and began to rob passengers. The robbers were not many, as many as 40 people.

They took money, jewelry, things, and mobile phones. The resigned captain also handed his wallet away. He was absolutely calm and there was no fear in his eyes, for he was Bishnu Shrest’s gurgle and this minor incident was not worth fighting. But the bandits seemed to have little prey. A 18-year-old girl was sitting near Bishna, and it seemed funny to the scoundrels if they raped her in front of her parents. They dropped her on the floor, began to tear off her clothes and in horror the girl begged looking at Bishna, "You are a soldier, do anything."

And the resigned captain stood up from his place. There was no fear in his eyes, for he was Gurka, Bishnu Shrest, and he was asked for help. He listened, but did not hear the saving act of the law. But since the law is deaf to the supplications of the weak, it will take the law into its hands.

The thieves made three fatal mistakes that night. They decided to rob the train, rape the girl, and... did not take the knife from the gurk. And Bishnu got his kukri (traditional Nepalese knife). In many gurks there is a tradition, if the cockerel is removed from the knives, it must taste blood (some even make themselves in this case a small cut to "feed" the knife). That night, the dog was hungry. Very hungry.

And Bishnu went with the faithful cockerel on the robbers and rapists. One with a knife against 40. And there was no fear in his eyes, for he was Gurkha, Bishnu Shrest, and now he took the law in his hands. With a rush of his left hand he pulled the rapist from the girl and covering himself with it as a shield he threw on the fools. A blow, a blow, a blow, and another blow. One of the rapists made a mistake and attached a knife to the girl's throat, but more than a cut he didn't have time to do, because Bishnu dropped him with a kick.

He was shot, but by. He was tried to strike with knives and swords, but he repelled them and attacked them. But yet one blast of the knife reached the target by cutting an artery on his left arm. Maybe it would have left someone, but not Bishna, a man without fear in his eyes. He had only one hand, but even with one hand He made the law. He attacked the bandits and pursued them in the wagons. Three bandits were killed, eight were seriously wounded, and the remaining 29 fled in fear. Yes, Kouchi had a delicious dinner that night.

The train arrived at the station where police and ambulance were already waiting for him. The wounded bandits were arrested and the stolen assets were returned to their owners.

Bishna Schrest was treated for two months from a severe wound. He was reinstated in the army to be awarded medals. The Indian government paid him a prize and reward for the captured bandits. The family of the rescued girl offered him a huge sum for them ($6,500), but of course the hero did not take a rupee. For he was and is Bishna Schrest, a man without fear in his eyes. He said, “To fight with the enemy is my duty as a soldier, and to get rid of the hatred that attacked the train and the girl is my duty as a man.”

Well, the highest prize awaited the hero from other gurks, a new dolly with silver coverings.

I don't know how you are, but I'm glad there are more people in the world with steel eggs and no fear in the eyes. Those who go for the right cause even if one comes to fight against forty. And it would be even better if the law had never been deaf to the supplications of the weak. Otherwise, hundreds and thousands of ordinary people will rise from nowhere, and they will become like Gurka, Bishna Shrest, and their puppies will receive a glorious supper because they will make the law.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №141643
 25.05.2017
You have two ways:
1st Or you get fun when you eat.
2nd Or standing naked in front of the mirror.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №141642
 25.05.2017
I thought to add, in the article "Aliteration" on wiki, the phrase "In Peter - drink", a very good and relevant example. I go into the article and see one example:
on the sofa
Nadia Vanya
I decided that "In Peter - drink" has not yet reached this example.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №141641
 25.05.2017
I am now watching the series "Ancient aliens" - ufology, paleocontact and all the like.. Show all sorts of monuments of ancient architecture, it is unclear by whom, why and how built, geoglyphs in the deserts and broken by some of the Offigen weapons of the city. And all this in countries that without Google and on the map you can not find, is it really, I think, in all of Russia the mother did not find a bad megalith, or there the pyramid lost weight, so that it was not shameful to show on television.
And you know, I waited! The native bushes of forests and swamps. Russia has been shown in the same series twice. The series was titled "Aliens and Deadly Places".

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №141640
 25.05.2017
I read the title: “A church school teacher in Los Angeles changed her students into a career as a porn actress. At the same time, the girl still shares all Christian values, as before.”

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №141639
 25.05.2017
Dikoy :
#Bogota, #Marasmas_of our town
Recently, due to heavy rain, a new semi-subterranean transport link was flooded. At first I thought that they didn’t think about a drainage system, like in Moscow, or that these drains just stuck, but it wasn’t. It turned out that they had three powerful pumps there standing for pumping water, but the man who had to turn them on that day did not go out to work because of the rain.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №141638
 25.05.2017
Yesterday I went to the gym, everything according to the standard - trained, and went to the dressing room.

I go into the shower (naturally general), I will make a small retreat, we are in the sports hall, if I forgot shoes can be bought at the reception for one-time use. So I go in the shower, and I see how a healthy man goes barefoot to the shower cabins, I decided that it is not suitable to do so, I just had single-use boots (new ones), which I actually told him and then there was such a dialogue (I) - I, (M) - a man

So, what is that bear?

(M) - Yes, I forgot the shoes, and no cash to buy one-time

(I) - Let me give you a tap, or God knows that you can catch up in the public soul.

(M) - (He begins to press a wide smile) So I'm not afraid, I have a fungus on both my legs...

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №141637
 25.05.2017
Years ago I was on a bus, the mood was good, almost lighted. And the self-esteem was heated by the winner, who admirably watched from the other end of the same bus all the way. As I passed by, he sent me a note. I still remember the text.

“I liked you very much! Call to me. by Misha.”

and all. If there was a phone number, you would look and call.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №141636
 25.05.2017
First, I want to say that our university and especially our philological faculty are flooded with foreign students, especially many Turkmen.

Next story on behalf of the teacher:

A Turkmen student comes to me and brings a notebook with lectures. I see, the handwriting is not his. I ask :

Whose notebook?

and mine.

What if the book is not yours?

My handwriting is not mine.

[ + 24 - ] [7 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №141635
 24.05.2017
I am tired of working, I want a penis.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №141634
 24.05.2017
I came to work an hour earlier today because of the "bad head does not give my legs rest"

I thought for a long time and came to the conclusion that there could only be one reasonable and logical explanation for your early appearance at work. You made an exact copy of yourself and sent it to work. I am writing copies! Tell your creator that I want it too!! to

I am *ROFL*ROFL*

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