bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №136841
 14.12.2016
The tomb of the wheelchair = the tsunami of hatred

I couldn’t get the car, my husband was leaving. Hanging a backpack with a small on the back, I pushed the wheelchair with the "old". In the narrow part of the sidewalk, she stuck with the wheel in the swarm while trying to crawl - heard steps from behind. Learned by a bitter experience, I turn around and prepare my entire English vocabulary to explain the situation, apologize and try to take off. But... my aunt approaches me, smiles at 32 teeth, says “can I help you?”" looks at the wheel in the wheel, moves through it, pulls the wheel forward, clarifies if I can get on by myself, and plunges on my business. I will go back from here. Canada and Hannover

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №136840
 14.12.2016
It is not necessary to read Bogomolov to know that Macedonian was an ambidexter. Read historical facts, not motivation notes. Take at least Richelieu: how many different things he did for France, and many consider him a fool who interfered with the queen with love, thanks to Dumas.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №136839
 14.12.2016
XXX: I saw her out of the shell

YYY: Where is it? ))

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №136838
 14.12.2016
Deadly number: Coffee as in a cafe", they just envy it all! They envy that you are not the same as they themselves are lazy ass, but you can really do something special!

Everything is more difficult. There is also a complex of inferiority: if this coffee-coffee is delicious and correct, then their erzac-coffee is wrong, and this is a rush. And the invasion from the point of view of demagogy must be answered by a transition to the personality and ethical depreciation in another plane: "Tasteful, but perverse, and therefore still wrong." This allows you to return to the confidence that you have done the right thing all your life, and mentally squeeze the alleged attacker.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №136837
 14.12.2016
I have a full girlfriend, well as a full, 80 pounds, her daughter at 20 decides that she doesn’t want to look like her mom and lost a few pounds at the height of 155. She was about 55, and she became 40. I haven't seen her for a long time, but when I saw her, my mom's friend expressed her concern that you didn't get too interested in losing weight? What my "smart" friend said in this topic: "You're just jealous of her." "I didn't even find anything to answer, it sounded so meaningless.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №136836
 14.12.2016
I read a book about the adventures of the Russians in Turkey. The main character was called Sergei, he had a shabby friend, married to a woman named Ira. I remember, in the customs declaration he indicated his wife as imported gold. They also had fun buying a dude there, Sergey then walked in it on the naked body by the number, and the girl Lena saw him in the window, so they met.

A shit, according to the description.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №136835
 14.12.2016
About Italian borders and stamps in foreign passports:

"He has no problem, and I...? Now I am worried about what this threatens me and what to do."

As it was written in one Italian textbook: When an Italian says the phrase "No c'e problema!" (no problems!Sometimes a problem arises immediately :)

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №136834
 14.12.2016
mikele_ukelele> I feel like I am getting older. That there will no longer be youth, that something new and incomprehensible is happening around. It’s like my time is behind, you know? As if life lived.
WereBelka> Mith, and Mith..
mike_ukelele> Well it is true. Does it not happen to you?
WereBelka> Mich, like grandchildren?

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №136833
 14.12.2016
I am forty years. I had women. And every one of them, the other one, the other, the other, the other. But! I do not know! Fuck, I don’t know anything. by Pacham! Why is the weather forecast 16+???? It feels like you have missed something in life.and (

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №136832
 13.12.2016
Daddy, you are a pedant.
I: I never noticed anything like that.
You are a latent pedant.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №136831
 13.12.2016
There is no connection between the women's dresses and the weather at all. They wear, they are jealous.

No one is jealous. Why do you think that if someone doesn’t have something, they have to be jealous? I don't need a coat - it's heavy and uncomfortable! I have a mountain skiing - are you jealous?

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №136830
 13.12.2016
Where is the rhythm?by :

The moment when the rhythm went well. The girl prescribed vaginal candles, went to put. She screams:
by Zhao! I lost her! I cannot touch. Where is she?
In the PI!@ and de!

" she" - " she"@&de!" - not the most successful rhythm.
A joke on the subject:
Lieutenant Rzhevsky told the cornet:
A clipper floats, a skipper on a clipper, a tripper on a skipper.
Cornet, coming to the barracks, decided to flash:
The Lord! I was told today by Lieutenant Rzhevsky's hallowed calambur...
In short, literally I don’t remember, but the meaning is this: The barge is floating, and
There is a syphilis!

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №136829
 13.12.2016
6 in the morning. Yoj decided to dig a hole near the heating pipe. He hardly rows the parquet, touching the steel pipe with his legs. I raised them all, shit.
P.S Neighbors from below as well.

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №136828
 13.12.2016
by 12.12.12
xxx: The owner of Technosila bought the network of Eldorado <link>
What did you buy for the new year?

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №136827
 13.12.2016
XXX: My dear, I am going. Walk around a turtle around the house.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №136826
 13.12.2016
I left for business in the evening, the child stayed with my husband for 2 years. I go back and see the picture: a child lying in a bed, almost asleep, hugging his favorite toys. My husband sings quietly. I listened. National Anthem of the USSR of 1944.

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №136825
 13.12.2016
xxx: the customer's comment came: "paint the coat in the shade of black"
YYY: Has your interior designer shaken in anticipation?

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №136824
 13.12.2016
Cherryne: He achieves the most, he has a photo album in the UK called "a little of me", one and a half thousand photos. I’m afraid to imagine what will happen when he puts it all out.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №136823
 13.12.2016
Flying from Russia with a connection in Rome. In Fiumicino, a border guard, rushing somewhere and already getting up from his seat to leave, almost without looking, stamped the entry stamp - as it turned out, on a Chinese visa. Having discovered it, I returned to ask if it was okay, but he was no longer there, there was another. The other took my passport, said there were no problems, checked the visa — or what they are checking there under some light — and stamped the second entry stamp on the same Chinese visa! When I told him that I already had one, he shrugged his hands and his stamp in the corner, where the circle of stars, crossed, and again said “no problem.” He has no problem, but I...? Now I worry about what this threatens me and what to do.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №136822
 13.12.2016
Damn you fucking. In modern weather, you can not only turn jeans, in such weather, if you want, you can run in the morning in some trousers, rub snow instead of a morning shower, and swim down until the ice is finally up, if there is a place. So nothing special to the feet of your capital boy will be, you can for him so do not worry.

And on the subject:
Especially careful Jews do not circumcise, but turn.

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