bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №7105
 22.06.2008
<111> The People! Give me something I can think of with a tap and a hole. I will bring you something useful!
<222> I have some money here...

Here is!! Where is that guy?! I need him. Let me collect r2d2

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №7104
 22.06.2008
Don’t worry about contact 12111. Chuck Norris decided to set up an ICQ client.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №7103
 22.06.2008
There is nothing more terrifying than when one day you go into the aska and see a little heart near a girlfriend you like very much.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №7102
 22.06.2008
I went to the site of the Hydrometeorological Center of Russia, I look at the weather forecast for Tambov. Wind speed: -9999 m/s It turns out that the wind was able to hit the flygel? O_0

It was just Tambov meteorologists brought a new screwdriver...

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №7101
 22.06.2008
We sit on the first pair - Matan.
Waiting for teaching
Here comes your predecessor on the terrier.
Comes like this, passes quietly, unfolds
We are O_O
And he is like this: "Well, this semester we will have contracts, we will go through something, something..."
Five minutes later he broke up...
Then we are like "and we have a matan"
It is "E... Is this the second floor?"
We are "No, the third"
He: "to your mother as much as you can" and dropped

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №7100
 22.06.2008
In the shop:
What juices do you have?
Hi I am Ricky.
- O_o...

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №7099
 22.06.2008
Rina: Fuck, Styles was almost out of fear!!!! to
I have a compact sound on my computer. The last time I checked, it didn’t work. And I put it on sound 4.1. and last time the noise on the whole rubbed to check the columns. All the settings went wrong, it didn’t work and it’s all here.
I needed a printer, so I needed a computer to turn it on. And here she survived.
Rina: It was the most memorable entrance to the window!

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №7098
 22.06.2008
What kind of phone do you like?
Yuki: I don't remember the names He's so big enough With big buttons There's black and white
Rare Case: A royal thing?and :)

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №7097
 22.06.2008
We said to them at the time of Peter I: Don’t let us go! Especially a ball!! to

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №7096
 22.06.2008
488354599 (21:40:30 17/06/2008)
You are added


Iriska;-) (21:41:47 17/06/2008)
Greetings

s_sapiens (21:41:54 17/06/2008)
Prive

s_sapiens (21:43:40 17/06/2008)
Well, let’s surprise me, write anything but "what do you do?"

Iriska;-) (21:43:58 17/06/2008)
What are you doing!

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №7095
 22.06.2008
In the rupee some joke in the article about lobotomy added a photo of the knife for ice cutting >_<

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №7094
 22.06.2008
Fuck, on Mail.ru flashes continuous advertising of beer, beverages, etc. is tired. I went into the settings, changed the year of birth to 1950, now around me Mercedes, banks, real estate. I felt like a man...

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №7093
 22.06.2008
by elenka (19/06/2008)
It’s always quiet in the street until someone comes back from jail ?

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №7092
 22.06.2008
Federation Council of the Federal Assembly of the Russian Federation

Interested they knew how they called themselves? O_O

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №7091
 22.06.2008
Well-washed and properly prepared brains are the basis.

The state kitchen.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №7090
 22.06.2008
The strange country of America. The first half of the 90s.



1st They flew the Delta, a group of 10 to 12 people. for registration

I shouted the name (the first and last time I saw it). after

After registering half of our employees, the campaign official says:

“All, there are no more places! The rest will fly on the next flight tomorrow.”

Just like a driver of a road truck, the type of standing on the road. Do not fuck yourself.

America I think. There has never been such a problem with the aircraft. Not to say

About the Lufthansa. The leader of the group in response said that either we

Everyone flies, or nobody. We were invited by a serious government.

You’re going to have a small scandal. Places are found.

It is designed for the rest of the stewardess.

2nd They arrived. In the airport just ahead comes a woman, literally bending.

under the weight of a large bag. I offer help. How she is on me.

I watched! As she broke through her teeth: “I can carry my own.

The baggage!” Then it turned out that according to American standards I did a little bit.

Not a criminal crime. The superiority of men over

The women. He made it clear that men are stronger than women. This is manifestation

Sexual chauvinism in a cynical form! So it was easy,

You could also call the police.

Three We lived in a quiet, cozy town. When you walk, they greet you.

unfamiliar people (because if you are not in the car, then you live no more than 20 years)

M is a neighbor. One day in a conversation praised the town, kind of quiet.

Probably there is no crime. The interlocutor asked where.

To take her? In fact, he said, I was stolen recently. went to

Sunday for a picnic, returned in the evening – more or less valuable tu-tu.

Well, I think one case is not an indicator, once a year and an uncharged gun.

He shoots. Literally in a couple of days in a conversation with another person

Compliment to the city. Yes, he said, there is no crime.

Almost almost. I was shot in my chest last year. Hearing

A suspicious noise on the first floor. He took a gun and went.

to see. I turned on the light and saw a teenager of Mexican nationality.

Well, the kind of hand up, or I will shoot. I did not listen (maybe

The English problem?He shot and ran away. More on this topic.

I did not start conversations.

4 is They worked in a former secret mailbox. Funny was

to listen to the instructions of the chief of the first department on counteraction

The spies. There were no closed topics in the institute, as far as I understood, but

The secret mafia is immortal, as are the history teachers of the CPSU.

of scientific communism. If you can agree with us, then

There are no options there. After three months, he decided to stay.

So much the same. Agreed with the boss, as appropriate, in two weeks,

Application for extension of permission. Application, again as required

The bureaucracy and in America the bureaucracy have failed over the past two weeks.

When they came for a pass, they found her and said, “Come through two passes.

the weeks.” Arguments like you are to blame, and we did everything right, and

that he has already had such a pass for three months and everything he wanted to have already seen,

Perceived in any way. I had to go for two weeks with

The escort. As if he had been transferred to the reception room under surveillance.

Secretary, you will think. But when she started looking for an employee,

who will drive him to the toilet, the man did not stand, asked

Transfer the computer home.

5 is I met my neighbor. I said, I know you are German. of course,

I wonder why she decided so. And I saw, he responds, as you

I was riding a bike in jeans. I’ve been to Germany and everybody is there.

6 is One of the Aboriginal’s favorite entertainment for the weekend (except for barbecue) –

Yard of Seoul. They pull out in the yard everything that became little or just tired and

They sell for pennies. In addition to an interesting time spent in communication with

The people, as far as I understand, aim to educate the children.

Entrepreneurship and respect for money. You sell all your toys.

I’ll add a little more and buy you a new bike. children

They mainly sell toys and homemade powdered lemonade.

I went to such an event. A boy and a girl of years.

5-7: “Doesn’t Mr. want to try absolutely free cookies?

Absolutely free! Well, I think they will be divorced now, and obviously not.

and lemonade. I wonder how? I ate cake. He said, “Doesn’t Mr.

Drink this delicious cookie with lemonade? Just 50 cents for a glass!

The normal price was, I remember, 10-15 cents. Where is Mr. Going?

7 is And finally, about the good. Almost everyone is extremely polite.

No one knocks at the door in front of the nose. The pedestrians do not even leave the road.

On the cross and even in the hour of peak. Not just women in a wheelchair.

Grandmothers with clothes. Commerce is something incredible.

I bought my summer shoes. The cheapest ones. Each week they

It was not designed for such kilometers. Once a week

He went to the store and changed them for new ones. I bought it from you, and you

have collapsed. No one asked for a check. I was one minute fifteen.

I went through the store after it was closed, not knowing it.

By the way, cheap ones. In addition to helping to find what is needed,

I heard nothing from the staff. Even though I answered something.

In other words, I don’t need anything specific, I just

I go and watch if I like it. Imagine what they would do to me.

sellers in a similar situation at home.

8 is And in conclusion. I was asked seriously,

There are cars in Russia.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №7089
 22.06.2008
The grandfather goes into the sex shop and asks the saleswoman:

“Daughter, I am dissatisfied with my sex life and the work of the computer. There is u

Do you have Bill Gates?

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №7088
 22.06.2008
Q: How is the test filled?
DiSS: What type is this about my personality?
J: Yes Yes
DiSS: here...you send me this text file...and I think so...no...it’s not the right thing to do manual arithmetic being a technician with a higher education...I’m going to excel...and I think...it’s no longer cool to hit a couple of formulas... let’s be an engineer first, but also an engineer-programmer...
I went into Exelovsky basic... and I think... well this is a hundred poodle is not cool if not to make a universal count of the results of such tests being a victim of scientific and technological progress from the early years... when I finished I asked the question... and to what hell I actually fell this macro when the test is only one and in general to what hell I have your cracked psychological test when I was still in the universe induced a persistent disgust to the humanities...
I looked in the mirror and saw the results of my personality test... with the big red letters:"Idiot"

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №7087
 22.06.2008
This should have been instead of the phrase "click on photos" to say "click on photos";

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №7086
 22.06.2008
EyeScream
Which account did Russia pay for?

Personagrated
We are winning one zero!!!! to

EyeScream
Are there other teams on the field besides Russia?

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna