Talk about the lack of positivity in social networks.

There was a small business, poor, but somehow it existed. And at some point, the owner decided: well, it's all of it - I want to go to the Azure Coast and right now. There is no money. Truths and falsehoods for the extension of the company. The expansion did not occur naturally, but the grandmothers were all successfully scourged. A month later, the accounting office, and the balance sheet that had been difficult before, did not meet at all, up to the failure to pay wages. A month later, the unpaid story repeated. The people quietly pulled to the exit: who to the labor inspectorate, who immediately to the prosecutor's office, on the way leaving scabies and non-positive inscriptions about the firm and its owner on all available internet sites.

How the above-mentioned complaining organizations work, if the request did not come from a "member of the employee's family" everyone knows. But the Internet knows its thing - very soon, the output was pulled and regular customers, and new ones, only envying the names of topics about the company, began to knock their eyelids so that even the telephone number accidentally did not see.

The owner could not leave the situation so easily. Do you think he has closed his salary debt? Oh, dreamers - he hired pizzers writing positive reviews on this your internet. Very soon, the amount of the contract for "whitening the image of the company" exceeded the salary debt. And laughter and sin, but you did not live in Russia, if you think the story ended there. He did not pay the pirates.

The pirates became angry and began to write shit too. When the third or fourth company to form a positive image of the company and its first person failed to change, the owner finally realized that he was doing something wrong and... became a deputy. Now, on quite legitimate grounds, he has the right to demand the removal from the issue of search engines compromising his information.

Jaroslavl Cossacks protest against abortion.
What causes the Yaroslavl Cossacks to have abortions?

I was scary once.

When I was 6 years old, my parents went to visit someone until late. I was left with my uncle.

You are just that, look there carefully. My dad warned him. He has been nervous for the last few days. The monsters were afraid of something.

Yes is normal. No monsters to be afraid. My uncle reassured him.

When my parents left, he started treating my monstrophobia. By a rather radical method – for two hours locked me in the room, cut off the light and started to scare me through the door with an afterlife voice.

I have not been afraid of monsters since then. I was afraid of my uncle.

When I was a child, I had a friend and neighbor of Lenka. We played together, and when Mom called to eat, we ate together. The food was the simplest: soups, cakes and so on. After cleaning up the dishes, we went back to our classes.

Once upon a time, Lenkin’s mother visited us. He goes into the case, and in the case asks:

What did you cook for lunch today? for breakfast? for dinner?

My mom wondered why the neighbor had such an interest in our food? When she asked again, she answered:

What purpose are you interested in?

The neighbor was a little confused and then replied:

My little girl doesn’t eat at home. I have no mind, what to do with it? And his cattle, and the pigeons, and all the varieties of salt - does not eat infection! Because you eat so that it breaks behind your ears. The worst thing is that I’m cooking too. What is the secret?

“There’s no secret,” my mother replied, “I’m never bothering anyone. Do not want? So not hungry. Marching behind the table. During the day, they run, get tired, eat everything you don’t offer.

I can’t let my child be hungry all day. You just have to cook what he likes. Today he has your cake with potatoes, here I will go and cook them.

Ordinary Russian woman, with bleaches from copytes and burns from b...

Is there anything good in Israel?

Glory Shifrin

On the third day of our stay in Israel, Zama’s “old” relative invited us to his home for dinner.

Zyama in our family was considered a dissident who suffered from the communist regime. He left for Israel in 1975, literally two months before an extensive revision in his supermarket. According to the results of the revision, the director of the supermarket was given 10 years, the deputy director was given 8 years, he managed to withdraw from the party and suffered a heart attack, and the modest merchant Zyama at the time of the trial had already drank warm vodka on the shore of the Mediterranean Sea and mourned the wealth earned by hard work and left for preservation to not very reliable people.

Sitting at the head of a table filled with unfamiliar food and exquisite alcohol (Gold vodka, brandy brought by Zyama “from America” and two types of wine – White and Red), Zyama presented to us his vision of the Israeli reality.

The climate here is terrible. This heat is totally unbearable for us Europeans.

Zyama, of course, considered himself a carrier of the great European culture.

Probably because he was born in the very heart of Europe - in the town of Baranovich of the Brest region.

Or because he taught German at school and could construct the phrase in German, “Woman, if I take 4 pieces, will I get a discount?”

Israel’s economy is falling. There is nothing of its own: no metallurgical plants, no oil, no coal, no aircraft, no aircraft carriers. “No ice breakers,” added one of the guests. Without American aid, this country could be closed tomorrow.

The army is one big myth. A couple of times defeated the stupid Arabs and joy. Look at how the soldiers here look like the Belarusian partisans who came out of the forest. They can’t go through the building normally, I’m not talking about the song.

Medicine in Israel is a disgrace. My aunt (he pointed to the fork on the old lady, concentrating on chewing the sandwich with new, apparently not in the Soviet Union inserted toothprotheses) for the third month stands in line for cataracts (he said so and said “the row for cataracts”). We would give the doctor 100 rubles and my aunt would have been operated yesterday, and today I would drink an oxygen cocktail in the prophylactory “Green Pine”.

Is this education? They do not teach anything at school: neither physics, nor mathematics, nor this, like her. The chemistry. I read all the literature by the age of 16 (“I listened to all the music by the age of 18, I reviewed all the paintings by the age of 20,” I thought). And they don’t know the world literature at all: neither Drun, neither Senkevich, nor Mopassan (Zama’s brother was the director of the maculature collection point, so Zama’s home always had the freshest literature).

Is there anything good in Israel? I asked with hope.

Zyama silenced, poured a glass of vodka into himself, with a precise, trained movement threw it straight into his stomach, without rushing to snack a champagne chewed with a goat baking, thought a little and replied:

The clothes will dry quickly.

Somewhere in the Krasnodar region, a woman judge, whose daughter's wedding, where Baskov, Meladze, Kobzon and Brezhnev sang, was discussed by the whole country, suddenly froze in front of the TV and whispered: "God, it was possible???"

I want to officially apologize to the creators of the pornography industry. From childhood, he considered this "scientifically popular art" documentary and boring. And, if “the most important of all the arts of cinema,” pornography, to this day, is “the most important of the cinema!” In which there are no bloody scenes of violence, no lies and no scattered political propaganda.

Thank you Uncle Vassula!

It was a recent story of news on the 1st channel about new standards in the reception of patients at the Sklifosovsky Hospital. It was said and shown there that when receiving injured patients, X-rays are now made straight at the entrance by such a device on wheels. Oh a miracle! It is :)

In the summer of 1981 I was 11 years old. Mining village in the Far East. We spent the holidays and as much as we could. That day we climbed the trees and roofs. A branch broke under me and I climbed on the fence from 2 meters. I was fortunate that the fence was low and the area of the district hospital was across the road. So I first got off the fence, clogged a hole in my right side with my hand and drowned into the hospital. Tired, he just started to breathe slowly after a painful shock, the bloodshed chopsticks, sat down on the wreck of the laboratory and here a good aunt goes. She saw me in the blood and said in a good voice, “boy! You have to go to the hospital and go on. The Pilates! Where am I going?
Arrived at the ambulance, there the man is pulled out of the eye. Sitting on the couch to wait. Here they saw me and led me to the surgical department. To the middle of the staircase to the 2nd floor reached himself, then cut off.
I was lucky for the second time. Surgeon from God Uncle Vasya Cherepanov!
On the couch, at the entrance to the department, I was taken a X-ray just by a wheeled device, put a catheter for future droplets, and since then I know my blood group. The hospital was repaired, so I was operated in the "dirty" operating room. Not many people know how protective birds sing in the summer outside the window after getting out of anesthesia. I was already discharged from the local gynecology (repair however!!!) is
On the other hand, Uncle Vasy’s one eye had a glass prothesis.
A lot of people have been saved by Uncle Vasya!
Low tribute to you Uncle Vasya Cherepanov for my salvation, long years if alive and thank you for the new standards in the reception of patients in the hospital named Sklifosovsky, established in that far away 1981 in the simple, Soviet, district hospital of the mining village in the Far East!

Presentations at weddings and corporations. The Cossack Choir. and expensive.
Ask to Vladimir Vladimirovich

People usually see kindness as a sign of stupidity.

As a child, I was a very active child. My parents did not have it easy with me. And although I was not capricious, but managed to quickly exhaust anyone, because the energy in me was like that rabbit from the advertisement.

One day my mom’s beloved aunt came to visit us. They have not seen each other for several years. In the city, my aunt was on the road after a long trip and was going to stay with her beloved niece for a few days.

I was 4 years old then. I passed through our narrow two, like an army of Hunts, leaving chaos and destruction behind. My aunt only had one day of contact with me. By evening, she had already picked up her bags, said goodbye to her mother and rushed home on the train.

My parents were so worried about my excessive activity that I was even drunk with valerian and driven by doctors. At the reception with another neurologist it turned out that I was completely healthy. Meanwhile, the doctor asked my mother if I was the only child in the family. Her mother jokingly said that she would not dare to have another such active child soon. The doctor said very seriously, “You think so. After all, if one child had to be tortured well, the other will be a “gift.”

This reception at the doctor made a strong impression on my mother.
A few years later she gave birth to a younger brother. As my mother later admitted, the doctor was absolutely right. Indeed, if you struggle with one, the other will be a “gift.” This was the “gift” for me.

“I was born” – I was born. It is “I was born.” We are used to doing everything ourselves.

There is nothing more unpleasant and annoying to a professional historian than a credible fact.

Jason Ohart writes:
"I played golf with a busy 78-year-old old man who constantly gave life advice. I have never met a bigger puppy in my life.
After the game, he told me, “Don’t talk to me in the parking lot. My wife will take me away, and she thinks I was deaf five years ago.”
The legendary man.”

You have the right to remain silent...Everything you say can be used against you in court.
Why do you read the words of American police officers?
"This is not a police phrase, it is a new user agreement for registration in Russian social networks.

The party is merely a form of organization of people on the principle of "your-strangers."

I talked to a funny couple in a neighboring bed. Misha is a healthy, slightly overpumped and overfed guy under a meter ninety. Masha is a thin, cute cock weighing twice as much. Both were shy and shy. They told me that they met a few days ago right here, at the resort. After the trial, they are determined to get married.

Michele remembered the first day of their encounter. They swam it all and swam it. The girl struck him with her fear. She swam well, but did not dare to go further than twenty meters from the shore. She climbed the rocks cleverly, but higher than a few meters up she was scared. I got married, but I kissed Misha. She packed things when moving from the beach to the beach with such care as if they were on a long space trip. She was constantly spraying the cream, afraid of burning.

Finally, Misha began to get it in order.
That’s why she is lonely! He thought, sadly, that she was a good girl.

In despair, he cleverly tried to drink her. The same smoothie came out - she replied that she loves Mohito, but refused to drink it categorically. I took a sad breath at that. Her eyes were filled with sad memories.

Why - Michele would soon be convinced on his own skin. The sun had already bowed to sunset when it broke Masha. She quickly drank a large glass of Mohito and was transformed. With a disturbing wide gesture, the hair adhered to the whiskers and turned into a beautiful witch with a hairstyle "enemies ruined the crown nest." The devil was clear in her eyes. She whispered laconically and whispered: I clutch to those stones! He threw his hand somewhere in the sea, and it was. Within seconds, her thin figure was already waving in the waves.

Misha could hardly see the stones coming out of the water in this Masha direction. The distance was a little frightening for him. But he was delighted with the opportunity to show her all his power and ability to swim. He left traces. He ferociously struck with all his limbs, his biceps and his triceps, trying to push this wickedness. did not succeed. It resembled a wheeled steam boat race for a torpedo boat. So much foam, so little.

Misha had already reached the middle of the strait and had been exhausted when Misha welcomed him with these stones. She was bored there quickly. He swam and went back to the beach. Moving past Misha, she joyfully asked: take me off on that rock until the sun settles!

Looking at the object of the film, Misha trembled. The rock really looked great, sprinkling out into the sea from the beach. It had only one disadvantage – verticality.
Masha is standing! He walked after her - don't think about going to her! You will be killed!

In response, there were bumping bubbles of her laughter. Misha was still bragging in the waves, when at the hellish light of the burning sunset he saw her figure cheerfully climbing up. With the cleverness of the broken cat, she grabbed for invisible performances.

Remove the slugs! He desperately blasted Misha. The rock consisted of smooth plates of the strongest mesozoic limestone, drowned by dinosaurs. Misha himself on such plates slid in wet shells and in a flat place.

But Masha hurried to climb the top before sunset. She succeeded. Without taking slides. When Misha finally ran to this rock, Masha had long and thoughtfully posed in the hills. The entire beach was delighted to photograph her silhouette at the same time as the sunset.

Take me off! Weakly brought to Misha.
Sit in silence! Do not move! I go behind the camera! He responded to Misha.
Take me off the rock! I am scared!! to

Mochi seemed to have been out of it by that time. Changed the sexy pose with the knee up to the emphasis of lying. He threw his head over the pit and was terrified.

The sorrow of Fedor was on her face.
Don’t take me off, Misha. Masha said bitterly – or you’ll kill yourself! I cry while it is light. Take it when I crash.

I thought about the absurdity.

Could you call a fire car? Let me be photographed.

"Then the barge must be called," Misha replied, "the drying technique will not come here. Let’s try it ourselves first. Sit where you sit, don’t move.

And began to rise. He could climb the rocks much better than swim. He reached the top faster than Masha. Three meters below it, I realized that further - only a ticket to one end. He got stuck with a dead grip for a couple of concessions in a position that allowed him to take the falling Masha on his head.

He carefully examined all possible taps for her descent. I asked her where to put her hands and feet. In shock, I did not immediately realize that Masha began to descend too in the slats!

Throw them down to the fucking grandmother! He was grumbling.

Masha humbly and alternately shrugged her legs. Both unwittingly looked down, realizing that they could hit someone in the bowl with these shoes. From the beach, the rescue operation was monitored by crowds. The slopes did not reach the spectators. They alternately collapsed on a slope and... exploded! Flown into many bright colored fragments. Thro the crowd went a crowd of astonishing admiration from the cycle "I don't believe my eyes!" The resting people caught the pieces that fell on them and looked stupidly at them. Misha almost fell out of surprise.
Masha, what was it? Did you hide explosives? Why Why?
The mosaic has flown! Masha answered sadly.

It turned out that its shells, modest from the outside, from the inside were a strange idea of the designer. The plastic pad had a high border on the edge, inside which numerous multi-colored pieces of elastic material were placed under pressure. They fled when they hit the shovel.

When this couple finally came down, it was awaited by a whole deputies with selected pieces of shellfish. The children walked into the hillside in search of the lost pieces. Masha began to restore the mosaic on one of the tapes, Misha tried to help her by collecting the second. But I had trouble. It was a real puzzle.
“Don’t,” said Masha gently, “there’s a pattern to remember. I will collect faster.

I looked at the fragments carefully.
“Children, there is still a small orange piece in the shape of a cupcake!

Detvora was delighted to spread around the surroundings and in a couple of minutes found the tea. And Masha, meanwhile, laid out the pattern, sometimes thinking.

Meanwhile, Misha began to comment:
We need to develop shoes! Increase the intelligence. Self-liquidate when the IQ of the owner or the owner itself falls. They recover if she has the courage to gather them back.

Masha laughed and continued to squeeze the colored pieces.

A resident of Barnaul was sentenced to five years for publishing Rorschach’s spots on the Internet. The court identified on the picture: demonstration of Nazi symbolism, insulting the feelings of believers, justification of terrorism and pornographic image of the mother of one of the investigators.

A monarch acting in the interests of the people is better than a parliament acting in the interests of the party.