bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №115453
 29.06.2015
The site was still considered humorous, but the fan was no longer stopped. There were still some separate jokes coming out from underneath, but the entire pages were covered with a flat layer of mental stools on eternal topics.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №115452
 29.06.2015
Adolf Einstein: The seizure of an electron by a German atom is not an act of aggression, it is only a step on the path to peace!

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №115451
 29.06.2015
Do you know what day is today?
and no.
Today is June 29!
and what?
Do you know what is June 29?! to
Amy... No.
Is that, no one knows?
and silence *
Fuck, I just have to get drunk.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №115450
 29.06.2015
I bought cement on the way to the construction, a folding grid, and something else... And then I remembered that I needed a solder and cannabis. She went to the store with the younger while the father and the older ones tied a grid to the trunk. I go out - and he so communicates with his uncle, who loaded a huge ring of glass-plastic armor on the trunk. I think: Well, the man is already thinking about the second closure! And yet everyone didn’t want to even consider this armature... I’m glad... Sit down, we go. Dad is excited:
Well here! There are shops that cut it! They still have cuts!
I suspect something wrong:
And what?
- And we guys can make nice bowls at all in vain!

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №115449
 29.06.2015
by 4pda
The news is that the new Win10 will not be sold on a disk, but on a flash drive.

DVD drive for installing OS? In my opinion, it is unreliable, long and uncomfortable. The entire life of the axis was put through USB, so the MS solution is correct.

There is no need for comments.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №115448
 29.06.2015
In the morning, I feel like I sleep best.

[ + 21 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №115447
 29.06.2015
Our technicians are such idiots! I write them a service note asking them to add to the drawing a gauge with a scissor M16x1,5 in such a quantity, after half an hour, the chief technician calls with a ride:
You asked for a shutdown, but you did not indicate the scratch!
The M16x1.5
Is it external or internal?
Maybe the outside? O_O
and yes!
In the gauge? O_O
and yes! No... no... goodbye!

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №115446
 29.06.2015
Arenol Shark: I have a family bike on this topic, like my grandfather-zoo technician, humbling my grandmother, in a romantic tone said: “You have eyes like a calf!”"
Grandma was terribly offended. And then it turned out that the eyes of calves are unreally good: thick, huge and with long eyelids. Then the compliment was appreciated.

[ + 17 - ] Comment quote №115445
 29.06.2015
If you want sex, why do you fuck?

That is why, that is why. And yet another reason.

- Well, and catch the cucumbers, if something is not suitable for you, stay away from the guys! If you don’t like something it’s your problem, we don’t owe you anything. If you are all so bad, and for no reason, so do not meet spontaneously, wait for princes, let people live! Have you tried to meet a person first and then sleep with him? And we also take risks, here’s one I know.

The logic of men is so masculine.

Guys, did you want to hear the answer to your question or just once again get upset at bad girls, who for some reason do not give the first whistle to every random encounter?

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №115444
 29.06.2015
Do not go to bed, no one seems to force you?
Catch up at least with cucumbers, but do not consider all men the source of problems.)
_____________________________________________
This is a version of the phrase: "Don’t like in Russia? You’re going to go into your Geiropa", right? Do you not even feel how infantile and unfortunate this sounds? The boy was placed in the corner, long ago forgiven, and he proudly still does not want to get out of the corner, stands, overwhelmed, and thinks: "Look, I will stand here until I die, and then they will all regret, will still ask forgiveness from me, but it will be too late!"
If women tell you that there is a SYSTEMAL problem in sex because of typical male egoism and indifference – maybe pay attention? Women are really hard to finish. We may not be satisfied at all from time to time, you simply do not have it (with some very rare exceptions). Female orgasm as a concept became known in the broad masses relatively recently. Please do not behave like idiots. change to change. You are not obliged, of course, you are not owed anything to anyone, but we ask you. We ask you to start changing, engaging in sexual education, raising sex culture. We need it, don’t you really care so much and you’re ready to hit anything, just to be right and drop everything on someone else?

[ + 18 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №115443
 29.06.2015
You will pay attention to how often in local gender reviews the quote is about one thing, and it is cut and answered exactly by the cut text, but about another. Whether it is with the sight of people something... or with the head... or they respond to what is convenient to answer. So we live.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №115442
 29.06.2015
by Tim:
My brother remembered. I was driving with my son (6 years old), was in a hurry somewhere. And in the city there was a plan "Interception" or something like that. In general, they were stopped, brother out of the car, hands on the hood, legs broader than shoulders. The boy comes out of the car and follows a dialogue:
Uncle Mussol! Let my father go quickly! (It is very awful)
And then what?
Or I’ll polish you!! to
And they let go.)

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №115441
 29.06.2015
If you can’t carry your girlfriend in your arms, the girl is unbearable.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №115440
 29.06.2015
The dumber the health situation in the country, the more on television becomes Dr. Malysheva.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №115439
 29.06.2015
Natasha is a trainer. He talks about his students like his mother. I couldn’t get rid of them even on my birthday. About an unknown to me girl: “Yes, it’s wrong. Writing well, it is helpless. But these are her mistakes. The own. Not downloaded from the internet. He is worried that it is going badly. But she goes on, just herself. He reads a lot and writes his own. But it is coincidence. Just made from such a test. Sooner or later they will tell her that it is easier to load the ready, slightly rework. For the works, okay, but in life? How can you explain to her how important it is—what herself?”

I listened to her, and in my head was a parable. And a real story. Once upon a time there lived a small but proud man on the swamps of a tiny river. From the south - Greece, from the north - samnites, with fertile grasslands and pastures. Their grain and livestock grew abundantly and were inexpensive, but even with them these nations were not favorable - in Sicily, Alexandria and Cyrenaica it was possible to buy much cheaper. And the unfortunate people in the swamps to buy was not for anything. I had to grow myself, in the sweat of the face. And only after a while it became clear that the main harvest of this scarce land is not grain or lambs. It is because of them that these people have so much stumbled. The main harvest of this land is the people themselves. Persistent, persistent, accustomed to overcoming any difficulties. These people and conquered the world – the Romans.

A similar story has happened on different ways many times before and after. Before the Macedonians, then the Spaniards, the Germans, the English. And we Russians.

I am not calling for conquering the world, we passed. I am about the fact that the final product of training is not officially documented. This is not a bunch of serious documents for which students try - works, examination works, tables with assessments. In five years, all this will go to laundry according to the regulation. The final product of a strange land called the school is the man himself, beyond the Copy-Paste keys.

I may have written it all, but myself. Those who write themselves what they think are not ashamed.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №115438
 29.06.2015
Sochi is the only tropical city in the world that has plenty of facilities for all winter sports, but there is no floodwater for the case of the rainy season.

by Andrew (c)

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №115437
 29.06.2015
YYU: The future has already arrived and is now shamefully wiped out of the grass.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №115436
 29.06.2015
An open tram stop without a barrel, there are two boys, in appearance - high school students, and a woman of 60s. The guys discuss something very fiercely, intersecting the speech with the words "fufflo", "fige" and other things, i.e., jargon, but without matte.
What a young woman she was! What an expression! as criminals, honest word!
Here the rain begins.
Woman (even more disgusting): What a government! Even if the roof at the stop was made, the creatures are...they!

[ + 21 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №115435
 29.06.2015
Moscow, 3 July, 18:00
Are you all unemployed? Do you work in Lubyanka? Everyone has up to 6-7 jobs. 10-15 minutes to get to the Chinese city.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №115434
 29.06.2015
Do you think the poor are grateful for what you give them? They consider you to be cattle, food base, and beings so inferior to them that it is you who gives them money, not they who carry it to you. I heard the contemptible phrase at the station: “The sinners, that is why they serve.” And this is a more or less decent old lady, not a boy or a Gypsies.

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