bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №6235
 01.06.2008
From the news website about Putin’s visit to the Bush family:
Chete Bush showed a layout of the entire Sochi region with future sports facilities. Looking at the layout, the wife of the American president noticed the river and the same name skiing complex, which is called "Laura", which in English writing coincides with her name, and paid her husband's attention to this. “Why is it named after my wife?” asked the President of the United States with a smile. To which Vladimir Putin, with a smile turned to Laura, galantly stated: "Specially in your honour".

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №6234
 01.06.2008
Sometimes I need to get out of the comp!! to
I fall asleep, go to the toilet at all speed, I open the door - and there is a stranger sitting on the push!! to
It turns out, while the CS crumbled, guests came to the family... This is how she, paranoid, and develops...

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №6233
 01.06.2008
The Talent:
I can’t understand why a mineral, on an empty stomach,
>a little bit "insert"??? to
and gt; gas

The Talent:
>this cup whispered, as if half a bottle of beer was drunk on the stomach :)


by Izia von Butterbrood
>yeyeye... a man. You are very lucky. It touches you from the mineral :)

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №6232
 01.06.2008
REKVIZIT
What to do in the universe tomorrow?

by Bilda
I have a beer for tomorrow.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №6231
 01.06.2008
Puppy
So tell me, isn’t it a foolish guy who, looking at the photo where I am sitting on a spaghetti on the ice, asks what kind of sport I am doing??????? to

Anko
Acrobatics on skis... a black shirt on the kamasutra. Gold Prize for Long Distance Running. You can tie a knot from your partner's leg.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №6230
 01.06.2008
The main thing in the art of flute is to pull a moderator into the flute!

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №6229
 01.06.2008
XXX: I have split up.
XXX: Am I a man?
You can drink beer again ?
xxx: thy
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №6228
 01.06.2008
Only a Russian engineer can fix a broken mouse for an hour, lose a piece, run around the store, buy the same mouse, remove a lost piece from it, repair his old mouse, discovering that the button works somehow wrong, and only after that to think about buying a new one.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №6227
 01.06.2008
Titanium
Advice to Firewall

Stray
and hz. I do not joke.

Titanium
Do you have an antivirus?

Stray
Haaaahah

Stray
Do you have a firewall? Are you a paranoid?

Titanium
Firewall + Antivirus = 95% protection

Stray
> Are you a paranoid?


Stray
As my uncle says, put on three handdoons at once - 100% protection! And if the second and third do not complete, there will be scratches.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №6226
 01.06.2008
The fucks!

I have never had such a number of toys on the compass in my life! Work is up. I have a submission of the project after tomorrow, and I sit down with red eyes in the worms. Here is only the third quake, unfortunately, until it starts - the drivers on the viewpoint got up badly, well nothing.
I’ll start it...I’ll forget it all...
— — —
In a few centuries, a normal man was caught! Respect and respect! =) is
And the woods are not wronged, they are just unborn. Go to nvidia.com and put a bag of wood there. Start with the command sh /path/to/driver.sh

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №6225
 01.06.2008
Yamaho (17:15:24 30/05/2008)
A friend from Kenya returned...Tell me how he found the grass there...))) without knowing the language)))

lost (17:16:06 30/05/2008)
How is? and :)

Yamaho (17:16:41 30/05/2008)
He goes on the beach...to meet two blacks...he goes to them...Jumba says (which means hello).They go to him)))He’s Bob Marley...Reggie....

Yamaho2 (17:16:49 30/05/2008)
They started singing and dancing.

Yamaho2 (17:17:06 30/05/2008)
And then they said: Do You Went Bob Marley Cigarettes...

Yamaho2 (17:17:23 30/05/2008)
Everything is done ?

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №6224
 01.06.2008
She (18:43:15)
I got into all the hard :-D
He is (18:43:54)
The opposite
He is (18:44:18)
19 days later(((((((((((I promise to be unsexy))((((((
She (18:58:10)
Why this oath?
He is (19:00:28)
I decided that the girls became so many that when one of them called, I asked "Who is it?",what she said "Katia",I was covered with a cold afternoon and began to recall convulsively with which Katya I could sleep with!!!!!! He was sworn in forty days because he was unhappy.
She is (19:24:11)
It was I who called you!!!! to
He is (19:29:27)
and crying!!and (

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №6223
 01.06.2008
Here’s everything to follow over the booth... And you know that there’s not hot water off :)))


There is no there at all.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №6222
 01.06.2008
Those who work the most have the shortest reports.

of work.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №6221
 01.06.2008
In the morning I meet a friend with a wife, a friend has a blue eye, I know that yesterday

He and his wife were at some anniversary party, and they were riding a car. They see in

My eyes are silent and his wife tells me:

This one, pointing his finger at him, yesterday pulled away from me and

When they went home, he asked me, “Well, we’ll go to you or you?”

The Houses? It is!!! to

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №6220
 01.06.2008
Better to see once than to hear a hundred times. Better to touch.

It’s great to fuck!

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №6219
 01.06.2008
The Prehistory:
With us, Odmin has been living in the server room for half a year... and in the most direct sense. a week ago, he had a birthday, and we all went off the department: we installed a shower cabin in his suitcase...

And now the story (from the ASI):

I am -
You can imagine that Martin was surprised.

HHH
What?

I am -
I went with a client to the bank, I have a contract for a fairly large amount of money... well, we have all arranged, we are happy to return to our office...

I am -
And here this miracle goes along the corridor: in a coat, shoes with ears, a towel is wrapped on the head, trousers are tossed out of the pocket... unwaveringly greeting us and hiding in the server room...

I am -
We and the client hanged for five minutes... then as we shop together... in short, the client said that now only with us will work :-)))

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №6218
 01.06.2008
I work in the service center.
Today brought a key, a description from the words of the client: "First the letter T, then the keyboard began to behave unpredictably"
Fuck, I’m afraid to turn her on, suddenly she will attack me...

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №6217
 01.06.2008
It often happens that the hot water is turned off. No one wants to burn dirt, you have to drag water from the kitchen, there to heat it in the basement, dirt excessively, especially washing in the pelvis is uncomfortable and not always effective. Electric heater - a thing, of course, wonderful, but Zuko is expensive and not everyone has it. Almost every apartment has a great washing machine.

All you need to do is throw the slurry tube from the machine into the bath, shake out of the drum, the powder does not need to be poured. Next, we put this miracle of civilization in the washing mode with boiling, clogging the hole in the bath. After half an hour we have a bathtub of hot boiling water, which remains only 'by taste' to dilute with cold water, to launch a yellow plastic bathtub and voila into the bath! The bath is ready, with a light steam of you, comrades.


Thank you, you have saved the world from dirt!

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №6216
 31.05.2008
Frenchman: Excellent electric shield in the project invented, SCUCO shield (central control system shield for boiler equipment), we are waiting for the reaction of the chief engineer

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