A few days ago, I washed coloured clothes with white and got an interesting result. A girl beat me.

The Father:

Many mothers are happy. They lead children, almost from birth, to developers, swimming pools, logopedists. As a man who graduated from school in 92 with a medal, a university in 97 with a red diploma, who passed Abkhazia, Chechnya, who read so many books that so many of them were written, the father of a three-year-old child, not a spock and not a nicitin, and who has not achieved such prosperity as Vasya, a neighbor who is dumb, I will tell you that, I believe, the child will need in the future life. English, fighting - from 5 to 12, Thai boxing from 13 to 18, minimum gun shooting skills, and not being a fool.

That is right. Well, why developers, logopedists... Only, IMHO, here and English is superfluous - with such skills of fighting and boxing who will risk not to understand you, even if you are not logical and do not speak half the letters of the alphabet, or speak in an unfamiliar language.

The male cat is a cat. The male horse is a horse.
Nails grow on the feet. Hand in hand. On the legs are leaves. When are the nails.

Liya: Some acquaintances from the Krasnodar region asked how it was in the summer in Murmansk, did not know how to explain. In the end, she said that we have a summer coat and a summer hat.

I go to the store with my wife.
xxx: meet a slightly buoyed guy, asks for a cigarette
XXX: I give, and he replies: thank you! What a beautiful girlfriend! God give you more!

<Natalia>Well, the journalists, well curved: "The next film of Anna Karenina excites the viewer with its unbeatable".
<Constantin>nu good though not "unpredictability of the plot"

My wife is looking at a property in Amsterdam.
The site is naturally in Dutch, she translated it into Russian in the browser.
He reads:
External memory device. This is what?
– Hey... Apparently a backup, a warehouse, something like... storage type.
- Oh yeah.. "Heating: heating pad"?
...??? to
- "Hot water: a geyser"
Do you look at the walls? ?

In trolling, the funniest thing is when after a while you go somewhere, and there they defend your point of view.

We have a full family.
We are sinners to complain.
You, Me, Son and Monk at Level 70 Season 10

I am responsible for every word I say, but not for the compot you make of it in your head.

(In the Egyptian)

December 2015, television channel "Russia-24", the program "Economy. The course of the day.” One of the experts:
The ruble is weakening against the dollar and the euro. This creates additional tension in the foreign exchange market, increases risks and complicates the macroeconomic situation in the country.”

April 2017 The same program, the same expert:
The ruble is strengthening against the dollar and the euro. This creates additional tension in the foreign exchange market, increases risks and complicates the macroeconomic situation in the country.”

It is hard for satirists today. You come up with a parody on our reality, and the State Duma, it turns out, is already accepting it as a law in the third reading.

How to Win in the Cross Noliki
The most stupid aid
In the crosses, you can win if the opponent is an idiot.
Tagged: ahaha
You have to learn not to play but to choose the right opponent :-)

I needed to buy a small bench to fit my ass in. To take therapeutic baths in it. Naturally, in the center of the capital, where I work and live, fuck you where to buy a raft. It is not royal to sell in such areas. So I found in Eve a form for baking a heart-shaped cake just under my ass.

You are a distant girl from science.
Not true, I am not far away.

I bought a laptop for repair. "It is not loaded!" Start the waiting line. Reboot, I go to BIOS - does not detect the disk. I disconnect, there is no disc. My eyes are rounded. The acquaintance proudly protrudes her lips: "Well, I took it, so that you don't crack in my photos!"" Found the strength to praise: she was able to do it without the help of others...

Scientists have discovered that a river has disappeared in Canada.

The morning. The Sushi. The Canadian Alcatel.

The same feeling when you can’t decide what is more fun to do now: refining the genetic algorithm of selecting the analytical type of function for data approximation, ordering the knowledge about the procedural generation of landscapes, an article about a new form of note recording, teaching a song under the guitar, reflecting on the physical “theory of observations” or preparing for writing a science fiction story – and you are written at this point that you probably have a very narrow spectrum of interests, because you don’t want a expensive black car and sex with the first girl who hit.

From Zh.

I am a translator. I frequently check for Google expressions. This fool instead of real texts began to add forums of translators to me. And I, fucking, need a live authentic text, not discussions of ignorants like me!

P.S I know, other search engines, entry under incognito, etc. He just made me mad today.

At school, we were sent as walkers to the city judo competitions. There were only two weights, up to 50kg and above 50. I have exactly 50. The coach said, go out. So I got into the group to 50 and won the first fight. With a little thing. He never fought.