bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 72 - ] Comment quote №17133
 09.06.2009
The game is "plus minus". One player sets a situation, the next is looking for a plus and a minus.

The xxx:
You are a diplomat.

YYYY :
+ You get along well with people
You know, you are a suitcase.

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №17132
 09.06.2009
And I also want to ask young mothers: please do not cross the road with a wheelchair forward (especially in the wrong place). Very scary for you.

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №17131
 09.06.2009
The Trimetyl Propyletyl:
Minsk, like your hamster?
by Minsc:
Minsk is sleeping, I am for him.
The Trimetyl Propyletyl:
And you who? O_O
by Minsc:
His hamster.

[ + 68 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №17130
 09.06.2009
I am on the street (I am a girl). In front of the two girls, one in a lightweight and very lightweight (even according to current standards) dress, the other in some coffeeshop and so thin and stretching pants that through them you can see not only the style of her underwear, but also the mole on the pop. I hear them talking:
Fuck, there is something I want!
Not to eat, but to eat. There is electricity at home, Rolton. I hate him, shit.
I don’t have Roland.
to share?
“Well, go, let’s go to Lechka, he will feed!
No, I can not. I only had it on May 28.
I was only in April! Let’s go as if I went specifically, and you happened to meet me, right?
- Ah, "accidentally" met, "accidentally" went to eat, "accidentally" eaten two pots of food. And most importantly, how do you pay for the service "pay"? He will not take the money and will not sleep with him.
Fuck what to do? We cook... fucking... No money, nothing to eat either...
Get married to him! One would be fed as his wife, the other as his wife’s best friend.
- Fuck, that's why only with age you realize that the ugly household man who can feed you is better than those beautiful muscular guys who fuck you for pants, sweaters and a restaurant, right?
Here I am knocked on the rust, I pick up the phone and, without typing the numbers "imagine the conversation":
Here are two shells coming to you, eat the shell! Chase them! What is "why" I am going to you!
As these two looked at me.

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №17129
 09.06.2009
My dear, will you feed me? After the morning she hadn’t eaten anything.
I can only offer evening yogurt.
zzz: If the "afternoon yogurt" is what I’ve thought about, I’m even afraid to guess what the "afternoon yogurt" is!

[ + 43 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №17128
 09.06.2009
In what year did the Great October Socialist Revolution take place?
1) The Rabbit

2) The horses

3) The monkeys

4) The Tiger

I don’t even know how to answer...

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №17127
 09.06.2009
Mademoiselle, who almost every morning by chance goes on the same trolleybus as me, just around eighth high school? You have been my mother since October.
Could we finally meet?

Miss the plz, at least in /abyssbest.

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №17126
 09.06.2009
Rin: I have stomach pain –_
I mean, someone lives there ?
Rin is a fool. I ate the sirens.
o o o o o o o o o
Rin: Well, you know, you’re looking for a five-piece flower and you’re looking for a wish. and eat. The sirene was mutant. There were 8 and 10 and more. I am standing at the entrance, hugging, eating, only having time to guess.
HH: And what then?
Rin is nothing. The grandmother came from the first floor stretched the biscuit, said: "How can you, what the child was brought to."
Rin: And the stomach is still hurt.

by DiVampire

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №17125
 09.06.2009
If the enemy does not surrender, it is destroyed.
If it is not destroyed, it is respected.

[ + 33 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №17124
 09.06.2009
What kind of tricks do girls not go to get married!
A friend told me about the situation with her colleague at work.
The girl burned on a man, so specifically, that it swallowed.
I want her to marry him as soon as possible. Object of Desire
However, the proposal was not in a hurry.
First, the standard method was used: Dear, I am pregnant!
Pregnancy, of course, did not exist in reality.
The man, however, turned out to be not a whore at all and wanted proof, for
Started as a test tape.
What to do? It was not really planned to fly before marriage.
The women at work were thoroughly interviewed by all women of the same age and
A pregnant colleague was identified. My colleague asked me to write and
Use the strip. The shell was carefully hidden.
When meeting with a loved one for more credibility, the maiden at him opened up.
packaging with a new strip of the same company that hidden, removed
I went to the toilet and made a replacement.
presented to a man. He was confused at first. Then he gets things.
three or four strips of different firms, stretches out to a friend and says:
You know, I’ve heard that the test tape is unreliable, often lies.
Step, repeat again with different strips.
The result: marriage did not come out, a friend evaporated, earned a powerful depression
this soil. All her men now, of course, are goats.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №17123
 09.06.2009
The dacha is the place where the plant becomes a tree, the seed becomes a vegetable, and the plant becomes a tree.
Man is cancer.

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №17122
 09.06.2009
I just gave and left. without words. And it’s not because I don’t like to see the manifestations of emotions, including those momentary ones, that make people do things that they later have to regret. I left because many of us started to confuse a gift with a bartender. When you give something and expect something in return, it is not a gift, it is a barter. And a gift is when you give "just so"©. I left so they didn’t think I was waiting for something.
Cake, wine and candy when I came to work, I took it out of my backpack, put it in one bag and put it in the refrigerator so that it didn’t ruin. And when I went to the server, I did not translate from the package to the backpack.
I’ve started pulling since February. Not in a hurry, not under the sticks, not in a hurry, but for pleasure and pleasure. For a gift, not a barter.
I was not going to take the 295, but I was looking for something thousand for nine. But there was a charitable campaign in the store - "donate an amount, get a ticket with a discount". Most discount is 1-10%. This time I got 50% (with indication that it is valid for purchases with base prices from 20K). So the 295th I got for 9500, including "donation". And the amount "drawed" by the eiradas.
I don’t care what they think of me. I am what I am.
P.S But the flowers didn’t come in :)

[ + 79 - ] Comment quote №17121
 09.06.2009
The chief in the morning drew all kinds of eastern sweets, sits down slowly eating. The accountant comes in, looks up and says:
What’s delicious, what’s not calorie?? to
The leader with a quiet voice, not moving away from the monitor:
The plate...

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №17120
 09.06.2009
Well, comrades students, from next semester we start studying?

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №17119
 09.06.2009
Listen, if there is a concept of “brain assault,” then should there be brain assault planes?
yyy: brainstormers, brainstormers, brainstormers and brainstormers. I know a few people =))

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №17118
 09.06.2009
Yesterday my cat walked into a textbook on higher mathematics, I had never had such solidarity with an animal.

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №17117
 09.06.2009
A friend recently arrived. The owner looks around the table.
Having seen an unprecedented device - a tablet, grabs it and tries to put it on the floor: "This is the weights, right?"
I’m in full horror...I succeeded!

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №17116
 08.06.2009
Valyard: During my six years at the university, judging by my remaining knowledge, I studied only yupology, yupography, yupometria and a little yuposophy.

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №17115
 08.06.2009
I’ve seen a lot... but in order to use ArtMoney to try to increase the download speed displayed in the browser...

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №17114
 08.06.2009
By the way, do you know who the Southern young people are talking about "fuck panda"? About moscovites who come to the south and sunbath in sunglasses. About a week later, they have circles around their eyes that are typical for the panda.

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