bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №6135
 30.05.2008
It was about lunch, I was sitting in the ash and, without suspecting anything, discussed with a friend of my acquaintances. In the midst of this correspondence, the accountant enters the room and we have the following conversation:
She: Hi, do you have a wireless keyboard?
I: Well, and what happened?
She: Yes, I also put a radio keyboard yesterday, just like you.
I: Great, you wanted me to help something, advice something?
She: Yes, I’d like them to start working at different frequencies, or you’ll hit me on the air.
It turns out that half an hour ago a 1C programmer came to configure something, because he only had to remove my tips! He tried to fight in the first place, when the phrases were such as: "a bouquet in exchange for the evening", "Look at her in the chest." But when it came to the phrase, “Take your donkey terribly into her little mouth,” the programmer apparently perceived it as a proposal from a computer brain, looked unhappy at the accountant and quit smoking, saying that he would not work anymore today.

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №6134
 30.05.2008
Buying Mac addresses from dead networks

The cleansers

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №6133
 30.05.2008
XXX is a greeting!! to
xxx: Hello to you!! to
YYY: Who are you?
XXX: Po Russian ponimaesh?? to
yyy: know.only English

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №6132
 30.05.2008
by MaYaK:
I brought up a new classification of errors - by phrases:
"Oh I am sure!!" - a simple error, as well as a syntax error
"What fucking thing?" - The mistake is complicated, the fucking thing knows how to solve it
"What I am?" is a logical mistake

The continuation:

"Pisdets" – a critical mistake
"Scuco" - Automatic error
"tasting" – the error of taste
"Yopt" - systematic repetition of mistakes
"x..y!" or as a variant "p..yes!" - end of errors

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №6131
 30.05.2008
Conversation between m.

Damn, don’t you think I need to lose weight before summer? Or somehow...
M: Yeah, I like it so much. My dear booklet.
Which one? Who is TEFT?? to
I said, My Dear, You are in the body!

The fucking shit :)

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №6130
 30.05.2008
XX: Let’s do something beautiful
Q: How are you Rubens?
YYY: Why did you suddenly talk about painting?and :)
XX: well what else we have beautiful... could be of course "about breasts" but I did not decide somehow :)
YYY:Tfu...and you’d be there with your eyes...
The eyes are definitely beautiful...but they are not remembered.
XX: Here is Rubens in the paintings.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №6129
 30.05.2008
SMS: I said my mom’s number, don’t call! Go out with your hatchback!! to

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №6128
 30.05.2008
<a> In the event of war even out of dumb calls.

<s> Only senior officers, starting with Napoleon.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №6127
 30.05.2008
Noein Fuck shorter with a friend ppc stumbled, drunk returned home at 4 o'clock at night, neither cars drive nor people, quietly fuck.... shorter we go quietly so do not hear the steps, suddenly we hear the ticking of the heels.. we stood, where in the corner to our side someone was going (so they did not know) shorter stumbled listen to the knock.... and the puzzles had to be a friend to scream "EDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!The Fucking Fuck!

In general, girl, if we scared you so much then, you’re sorry 😉

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №6126
 30.05.2008
I think that advertising wwf "opt out of black caviar" is somehow inappropriate in the bus...

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №6125
 30.05.2008
M: What are you doing?
J: I sit, quietly degrade, I do not disturb anyone=)

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №6124
 30.05.2008
Fuck you fuck! There was no explosion.
Fuck the panicers! I am from Dzerzhinsk. The fire was extinguished in the factory. No one was hurt! There was no explosion!
You don't know all the information - fuck up and don't panic breeding!

Bring it to the top so that these pydors are already shut!

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №6123
 30.05.2008
1 to Fuck! Fucking in the mouth!! to
Fuck, are you kidding? Speak culturally
1:...
What do you usually say when you crack the screw of your best friend?
2 the screw? My Winchester?! to
2 is fucking! Fuck your mother!! Fuck the fuck!! to

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №6122
 30.05.2008
It was Border Guard Day. They met a friend in military uniform and decided to congratulate them. He was already buoy, stood, listened... Then he said – “bl@, I didn’t know that today was such a day!” The shape was dressed because the wife washed everything"

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №6121
 30.05.2008
I come to work, I turn on the computer... it doesn’t turn on, the blue screen error and that’s all! Loading does not help! I call our programmer, he’s coming from a terrible buon, he’s carrying a crack!!!! I barely eaten! He sees the blue screen and with the screams "AAA, scuca!" beats him from the top with his fist reboots, adds "Work us!" and kicks. The PC is working!! I will call him in 20 minutes. The printer persistently shows that there is no paper! even if the paper is enough for a year! The programmer come and whisper with the scream "AAA,scuca!Work niibet!and beats his fist, enables and he works!!!!! to
And he adds to me: "Do not sin anymore!" and goes away...
I have a question: What kind of God is it that makes it work?!?!? to

[ + 2 - ] Comment quote №6120
 30.05.2008
Attention to the residents of Nizhny Novgorod and Nizhny Novgorod region!!! to
On May 29, 2008, at 21:30, an explosion occurred at the "Orgsteklo" plant in the city of Dzerzhinsk. He was so strong that the walls were lifted up in the shop.
In this workshop there was a large amount of blue acid. As a result, a large toxic cloud was formed in the air.
According to the latest data, 42 people were killed.
The wind blows in the direction of Nizhny Novgorod.
Local channels and radio are silent because the order was given to not disclose! We hope only for ourselves!
I recommend closing the windows and doors.
Blue acid is very dangerous: to poison one person, you only need a few portions of a gram!

Bring it to the top!! to

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №6119
 30.05.2008
I need to wash my hands, or I will get some infection, nakher.
<Pets> <Pets>Pets>Pets>Pets>Pets>Pets>Pets>Pets>Pets>
<Royal> *WALL*

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №6118
 30.05.2008
I love anime because there are always bad not Russians, but Americans.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №6117
 30.05.2008
What about the fluidity of frames when even galaxies run apart!

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №6116
 30.05.2008
The story of cats with the keys to the apartment.

I go to acquaintances, trailing, to-se. They have a refrigerator door.

A gymnastic 32 kg support. To my unclean question

Explain: the cat goes to the refrigerator, opens, supporting his legs,

the door, drops the egg from the cell to the floor and slides. The Door Naturally

It does not close. Less heavy headaches are removed.

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