bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №84705
 26.07.2013
Have you tried running in the morning?
The first day I run, the second day I run, the third day I get depressed and start to eat.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №84704
 26.07.2013
M : My colleagues! Don’t forget Friday’s timelapse!
I would drink beer with my friends.
M: That is, there is nothing stressful in the word timDilning?
Tagged: Tension
J: But I liked the idea.

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №84703
 26.07.2013
Miss Thailand on x#u threw all accusations against her

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №84702
 26.07.2013
Lucia, a lonely middle-aged woman, when there is a thirst and you want to feel a man nearby, goes home not on a steep BMW, but in a crowded subway car. This session lasts for 4 months.


[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №84701
 26.07.2013
A cat is more likely to survive a fall from the 7th floor than a cat from the 5th.
WOW : Why?
Well, she turns out to have to fly through 5 floors to realize what’s going on!
WOW: and pull the ring of the parachute!)))))

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №84700
 26.07.2013
Kyrie: By the way, about Nero, I haven’t heard of him for a long time. But with the speed with which they added new fichies, I’m sure they’ve already created artificial intelligence and flown to colonize Alpha Centauri.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №84699
 26.07.2013
If a child loves work,
A finger in the book,
About this they say:
He is a good boy!

© S. I Marshall

_________________________________________

Mayakovsky "What is good and what is bad". Learn the game, shit.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №84698
 26.07.2013
They brought an agenda from the military. The naive mist.

[ + 15 - ] Comment quote №84697
 26.07.2013
It was a long time ago, in the 90s. In the second grade, a girlfriend fell in love with a guy from the fourth grade. He is a blonde, an athlete, played for the institute in basketball, etc., short of a bunch of merits. He paid attention to her and invited her to the cafe. She returns from the date of evil and upset. He tells me, “He drives me, everything is romantic, we talk about sports! They already arrived at the community, and he did not take my hand, did not embrace me," she decided to hint on him, walked around and said, "something was cold." He said, “Is it frozen? I have a reliable way to warm up, the coach taught us. You have to jump, pulling your knees to your chest! Try it! Look, I’ll show you how to do it!”
The park, the snowflakes revolve in the light of the lights, and he jumps like a goat and screams, "Try, or you will freeze!"
In short, she offered him to stay just friends, he was confused, but that’s another story.
I mean, we were sleepy at the time without the internet, we didn’t have friends. They just cut off the doughnuts and raised her on the subject.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №84696
 26.07.2013
I am pregnant
I just got this message from a friend named Maxim. But the reflex worked.

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №84695
 26.07.2013
xxx: crowns along the roads act on drivers better than signs and fines as they make you think.
YYY: You look at some and think only about how it could have been in this place to fuck to death?

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №84694
 26.07.2013
Comments on auto.onliner.by

Yes, I remember sleeping in the front seat on the road from the airport in the evening. Suddenly I wake up - I am in the driver's seat, there is no steering wheel, fuck at the meeting and the headlights ahead. I haven’t pushed so hard on the floor before.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №84693
 26.07.2013
Do not deceive yourself, fellow citizens, spinning on the fact that the photos on the passport did you some wickedness. We really look like that!

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №84692
 25.07.2013
xxx: :-P F VYT,JKMIJQ VJYBR LFKB
Yyy: Thank you, the window activated.

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №84691
 25.07.2013
There is a radio in the capital where there is no specific format and you can hear anything during the day, especially in the application program.
At the height of the working day, on the backdrop, the radio is noisy and suddenly we hear by the edge of the ear that some man asks to congratulate his mother-in-law with the anniversary and put her in the “Gaza” sector.
And the words of the host through the pause: "Unfortunately, this song is not in our database, but we congratulate your aunt and put a no less remarkable composition "PunKrot" - "Big Fat Happy Shark"...
The working day stopped, someone left smoking, someone under the table.
I wonder what happened to the maid?

by PS. Respect you radio "Capital" for the excellent mood!

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №84690
 25.07.2013
Discuss the possibility of the bears to return to the stand on their own:
1: I can not. Maybe that's why sometimes a goat is put on the head of the oats' oats? Probably they are smarter. and :)
2nd Sometimes even a whole word of goats.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №84689
 25.07.2013
I am by nature a fighter) and by figure a fighter (

[ + 47 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №84688
 25.07.2013
I am preparing for a new job. The managers seem to have no questions, they send to fill out the questionnaire. A few days later a call from the HR department: "Sorry, you have not passed the security service, the reason is unknown."

From the manager with whom I was interviewed I learned the reason - I in the column "A way to contact you urgently", solely because I was bored and I wanted to smile to the one who reads these huge boring questionnaires, wrote:

The cell phone.: +79*********, in emergency situations you can dedicate the spotlight to the sky.

If this easy joke is a reason not to work, then this world is dead for me.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №84687
 25.07.2013
He: Come home, get out of the freezer the bacon, plus
She: I don’t know how he looks.
He: Well, that’s not chicken, not ice and not peelings.
She is...

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №84686
 25.07.2013
Article on the tape: Pele did not dream. Nigerian players disqualified for 146 goals in two matches
Comments on Lack of Video:
Where is the video, fucking.
- Here's how it was, all the most crazy and boring matches in the world are always taken from all angles, and the most gorgeous show operators are about...

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