The teacher: The student! You matched the result in response!
Student: Does this not please you? Are you an oppositionist? Are you sponsored by Americans? Should I call the police for trial?

from vk.com
xxx: Citizens of Moscow, we need a responsible comrade (m/g), capable of performing one easy assignment for reward! Subscribe to us, recommend friends!

Yyy: Bringing a bomb to the Helm Padi?

XHH: I am grateful for my work
WOW: In the sense?
THANK YOU: I am working.

A pregnant employee left sandwiches with nutella in the refrigerator. The manager opens the refrigerator and asks.
Whose are these unsweetened sandwiches?
by Galina
- Yes, pregnant they are like this: "I want a sandwich with shit!" - "No, I don't want a sandwich with shit!"

There is an accountant.
The director is delighted:
How are our pre-year finances? Singing a romance?
The second album has already been recorded.

by formspring'e

Question: What is the best gift you have received?

Domankov:I remember when I was a child when I or my brother was given something for my birthday, often the gift was put in bed, that is, you had to wake up with the thought that what a fool is preventing me from doing it. One day I woke up with the rolls in bed.
And there was still a tradition, if you gave a cell phone, then your night secretly puzzled, switched the sims, put a new under the pillow, and called in the morning, from which you woke up and all such a happy oral "YAAAZH%!&#@" and "here is the phone of my dream here".
What a gift was the best I was, but probably good that I never asked for anything like a snake or a tarantula, it would be bright to wake up.

pen_guin: Every year the voices in my head become more and more clear. It seems that the cockroaches no longer hesitate to comment on my actions.

Nowadays, deleting a page in the social network is equivalent to local suicide.

How is? Well, how could you throw a cell phone into the wall, so that neither the fragile touch screen nor the sensitive filling suffered, but... the @#$ simka broke?!!! How is it?

I received the mail from our manager this morning.

Hi Alexey!
I would like to ask you to change the contact of your ass, as your customers confuse it with the phone number and have been calling me for about a year and a half and ordering your laptops))) And this is not a joke!!! They already got me!! Please try to resolve this issue faster. Thanks in advance)

I stopped at a small pavilion – a store. In front of me is a healthy goop with all the attributes. His turn comes, and he says to the seller: “The strawberries are like that, the cookies are like that, the litre package of juice is like that.” He paid and went out. Then I: “Liter of beer and a pack of cigarettes.” He paid off, went out, felt shit. ( by

News on Yandex:
UN accuses Russian airline employees of rape

Our airlines are so harsh that they fuck the United Nations.

The xxx:
Do you think there is a perdoz of lemonic acid?
The xxx:
by Fuck*

The Ministry of Internal Affairs has proposed to ban anonymity on the Internet.
Anonymous on the Internet are proposing to ban the MVD.

Latest news from Bora:
- So everything is bad in the Russian Federation after the elections or even worse - the opinion of famous political scientists from the Internet
- What is happening in Moscow: have tanks already been introduced or are they currently operating with a battalion of special forces? - records from eyewitnesses
- Who else should play Bezrukov? - recognized film academics from the world wide web express their thoughts
Your cat - a cute beast with a lack of consciousness, instinctively controlled or sent by an alien civilization spy with a mission to seize power on the planet - advice from experienced breeders
And also constantly updated gossip, scandals and scares from social networks that came there from here.

Z is. And yes, sometimes there are rare incisions of humorous situations from the life of admin and not only

I read in the collection. I sent to the secretary, I thought we would laugh together, and I was still roaring alone.

Role by 11:15
I found it on the computer.
C:\Here on the job\Hemorrhoids\Stupid clients\Non-payers\Oxuews\Dear Sergey Anatolyevich.doc

Swedish 11:16
In my thing?

TerraPower, which belongs to Bill Gates, is negotiating with Chinese companies on the development of a new-generation nuclear reactor, reports Associated Press.

All fucking, the reactor on Windows.

XXX: How are you in Moscow with traffic jams? Why are you not late?
Yyy: Well, for example, today I left at 7:30 to arrive at 9. Arrived at 10. Good to be at 12 :)

I turn on the TV, and there is a labyrinth lake.
I almost sat.
It turned out, just some channel from NTV-plus increased the craving for culture :3

Yandex surprised me:
I enter "adddefaultcharset utf-8"
The first version of the title with Matt
It has to!! to
He told me when I introduced...
What if the child introduces something?

Bone... what kind of child?