bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 37 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №16833
 28.05.2009
Halop: People... Who knows how to shake when both hands are in the gips...

[ + 50 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №16832
 28.05.2009
XXX is
I am a very passive woman:'(

YYYY
I noticed it at 14:42))

XXX is
14:43 and you noticed:'(
14:43 all... only myself now will be :-D

YYYY
14:45 Will you be passive with yourself?

XXX is
14:45 yeah... I’ll go to bed... I’ll stretch my legs... and I’ll wait for it to end.

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №16831
 28.05.2009
Hearing on the radio in the program about high-tech news: "A new alarm from the company ******* according to the developers will be able to wake anyone up. At first, it rings like a regular alarm if the bright white LED backlight is not turned on enough. It can ring in different ranges - in the range of low and high frequencies. Also, if you put it on the bed, under the pillow or near the bed, it will vibrate heavily and thus shake the bed. If that’s not enough, it will call your phone until you turn it off. It must be made in the shape of a human head, so that you can get up, give it a fuck and go to work.

[ + 92 - ] Comment quote №16830
 28.05.2009
We are sitting today with a friend in the reading room on the 4th floor in the universe. He shakes, I roll over lectures on the sopromate, there is a small hurricane on the street (we often have it, so nobody flies).

Here, suddenly, a blow of wind breaks out the drive on the window, it opens up with a terrible thunderstorm. The wind passes through the audience, raising up all the small objects in the room. Just at this moment, the friend suddenly jumps up and asks the whole audience:
"Remediation and Destruction!!!!!!! Everybody leaves the room!!and "

The people froze in amazement and even stopped catching their records.

It has to be linked to science fiction.

[ + 32 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №16829
 28.05.2009
Science can come up with any name for the flu, but not to recognize it.
Your attitude to what is happening.

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №16828
 28.05.2009
I teach at the university. As usual, students play with the teacher.
– Dmitry Mikhailovich, and let’s go to the theater with you.
“Thank you, Margarita, but I don’t have time right now.
I am thinking about the article.
What kind of article? I already have eighteen.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №16827
 28.05.2009
He is an evacuator. She is a tax inspector. Watch the video:
“The Clash.”

[ + 40 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №16826
 28.05.2009
xxx: People living in the academic town, easy to distinguish by smell from the rest of Kiev
YYY: Do you have a river-smell flowing there?
No, the water was shut off for a month.

[ + 40 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №16825
 28.05.2009
There is one exception, however, this guy is equally polite with everyone. Friday, my dr, the mood was shaken by a slope with bugs. I sit down and cook rolltons. I hear a knock on the door, the above-mentioned “exception” comes in:
Hello to Nate. Happy Birthday to you, and put on the table a “traditional” box of candy, a bottle of Chianti and a bag of cakes. Don’t get rid of Rolton.
I don’t have time to thank him, as he gets a giant bouquet of fresh roses out of his backpack. I have never had so many flowers in my life as there were in this bouquet. As I look at the bouquet, a slide appears on the table:
This is a sweater. and self. I hope I evaluated your figure correctly and he will be on the right track, - here the guy silences for a moment, looks at me and smiles. Your facial expression is like, “Thank you, of course, but I would like the processor.”
I smile confusedly. The guy puts on a backpack, says goodbye and says at the exit: "The sweater is wrapped." I turn out. The GeForce GTX295
I sit at home, in a soft, warm, cozy sweater and socks (which he didn’t say), drink Chianti, eat cakes and think, “what am I, fucking stupid, if I’m most pleased with a video card?”

I think why are you happy?Chel she loves unrealistic, and you on him... Think about it!!!!!!!! to
and Yorri.

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №16824
 28.05.2009
Very useful advice for all students who can’t take their ass off the computer and start preparing for the session:
put that big thread on the race (film in good quality / game / yes anything) for 2-3 hours, and better on all 5 and go to the battle. Three to five hours of preparation is all that. And then a deserved rest. I do so, not the first session, it really helps...

© Z

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №16823
 28.05.2009
Q: Why do you think my application did not go into the application program:
Today, on this wonderful and sunny Friday, the boss with a smile asked me to stay in the office until 8 in business, which I am pleased, and I ask to put him on the air something from Masani's repertoire about the boss.? to

[ + 49 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №16822
 28.05.2009
PZRK "The Needle" - The Dreams Are Completed

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №16821
 28.05.2009
A car like a woman, constantly needs a shower and asks for all kinds of delicacies.
There are probably also boys cars.
Girl 1: Nuow, those ask to eat and fuck - type of our classics

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №16820
 28.05.2009
Have you ever tried to spend money on beer for food?
I tried it here...I liked it.

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №16819
 27.05.2009
The more incomprehensible the quotation about the computer, the more funny it is. I’m right in doing such things, right?

[ + 78 - ] Comment quote №16818
 27.05.2009
News headline: Americans will kill people with environmentally clean bullets
Unlike the standard M855 ammunition used in the M4 automatic carabines, their bullets are made of vismute, which causes less damage to the environment than lead... the creation of such ammunition is a significant step forward, which will significantly reduce the emission of lead into the environment.
I only think they have a code error, genetic?

[ + 70 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №16817
 27.05.2009
Today I cleaned the apartment and stumbled upon a notebook where my mom recorded my bright moments in life, such as the first word and other hernia. I read the recording:
" 2 years 6 months My grandmother goes to a stop:
Grandma, take me on the pen.
Betty and her son said:
- Grandma, now we ran on a trolleybus!"
Now I understand why the universe teachers say to me that I am naked.

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №16816
 27.05.2009
I’m sitting down this morning, watching the TV, the news starts. It sounds the only phrase:
North Korea conducted a nuclear weapons test.
The fucking! Blue screen, nothing works
It turned out that the unplanned prevention on the television station...

[ + 89 - ] Comment quote №16815
 27.05.2009
I just found a small round in a pack of triangular cookies... how could she, so small, survive in this triangular society and not become a triangular one?
A cake with unshakable will.
Now I persuade her to become my teacher! It is silent, it does not give up, it is a big cake.

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №16814
 27.05.2009
Sister plays some kind of military flight shooter, where you are given a plane and five to six crew members sitting in different parts of it. They can receive reports on the state of the races.
So here, I sit on the couch, she plays tightly on the side and whispers under her nose:
“Oh, he’s all right... He’s all fine, just great! And the fact that he is dead sitting in the burning tail of an airplane is nothing, it’s normal.

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