bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №140253
 06.04.2017
(for the cat)

Irina
When I go to work, I use a computer via a timweaver passport. I leave a new tab on the browser.
If there are left letters - it means that the hole is on the key.
I turn on the music and he waits and goes away.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №140252
 06.04.2017
xxx: The employee’s name "Rock" is sliding or not?
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
YYY: It is not just for the female sex.
That is, if he changes the sex, will he stop bending?
YYY: Yes, it just needs to be pushed back.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №140251
 06.04.2017
He received from the Department of Labor Protection a memorial on actions in case of hostage capture to familiarize the collective. I informed. There are types of points:
- tolerate deprivation, insults and humiliation, do not look in the eyes of criminals, do not behave provocatively,
- comply with the demands of criminals, do not contradict them, do not risk the lives of others and your own, try not to allow hysteria and panic,
To do anything (sitting, standing up, drinking, going to the toilet) ask for permission.
These paddles returned the memo and said that "they knew, the collective treaty was read..."

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №140250
 06.04.2017
All will be taken and fired. And here is this aunt "until retirement one and a half years left, and there even grass does not grow" and the middle-aged specialist "three children want to eat today, and not when the strike (may be) will bear fruit" and a young specialist, no longer needed anywhere with a bunch of experience "and what this he a week as the past place hired, and yesterday already resigned?". Others are already writing statements. And they disappear. And they remain on the increased load not the best representatives of the profession or just working for the soul of the teacher, who do not need income - the husband will buy shoes (and they go away from the stubborn in this very soul battle of the poor parents, just recently here on the topic of how she dares to buy shoes for her husband's money - it would be better to feed and drink other children at her own expense and provide toys).

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №140249
 06.04.2017
The less you steal from the state, the more carefully it checks you.

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №140248
 06.04.2017
Behind every successful man is a grandmother who believes in him.
Behind every successful grandmother is a fool, whom it all came to pass.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №140247
 06.04.2017
To the shit about the Great Teachers’ Union and the millions of statements written under the copier.

The labour market works normally. Do not use non-market methods. It works this way: where they pay little - there are people who pay more for nothing. This is a quick but inevitable process. An old teacher-fan of his business, working for nothing for the idea, will retire - he is generally a rare creature in any generation. There will be no new one in his place. There will be a marijuana who does not want a big salary - she wants to be next to the house to take care of the child, in the summer, a longer vacation and two dozen unrighteous little things, on which you can scream, take the line and spit out your anger on a failed life.
Marianne will not write a statement of solidarity. All that can be achieved is to accelerate the departure of those who have gone wrong and already regret, but for the time being try to do something. Their place will be quickly recruited by new marijuana, we have a lot of them.

Increasing wages does not improve the quality of these employees. Just for a high salary competition, and you can be promoted. But for this we need a leader who matters the outcome and who will choose those who work best, not those with whom it is easier. Just raising salaries in schools will not work.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №140246
 06.04.2017
XXX is oh! Funny is! On the website of the Ministry of Internal Affairs link "Report about the drug!"
YYY: What is it, they lost contacts?

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №140245
 06.04.2017
Uncultured, of course, but gummies should be sprayed on roads and pavements, not in urns. Maybe at least they will get stronger.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №140244
 06.04.2017
On the email came the advertisement of the seminar "Procrastination: how to make the lazy work for yourself". I looked at how much it cost and didn’t go, because my laziness already works for me, allowing me to significantly save on seminars. I suspect a recursion. I feel millions.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №140243
 06.04.2017
I have a great poverty.
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
My clock is dead.
The fuck was 17 years old.
xxx: now I walk like without hands and suffer
The master said - in the morge :(
The clock?
YYY: In the sense of hand?
XXX: Ohga
They used to be worth two of my salaries.
xxx: Patamusta 17 years ago I had a salary less than pizzot euros, bgggggggggg
XXX is fucking. I am in stress now :)
Tagged: gmmm
You are an idol.
The clock?
YYY: The monodiversity?
xxx: yes
YYY: What can only time show?
Tagged: OMG
xxx: yes
Only Time, Only Hardcore
I hope they were at least as an accessory.
YYY: Bring them to stop.
XXX: O
yyy: their functionality will become even more highly specialized
XXX is a thought :)
yyy: Show time only twice a day
xxx is real :)

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №140242
 06.04.2017
The regional government has given the task to hold a anti-terrorism rally on Saturday. Budgetary membership is mandatory. Whether the government hopes that the terrorist, having seen the rallies across the region, will cry, dismantle the bomb and return home to Syria, or, on the contrary, that he will blow these budgeters to the tails of dogs, since they are all gathered in one place.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №140241
 06.04.2017
Citramon in the pharmacy from the manufacturer costs 6 rubles, in paper packaging.
In other pharmacies, the usual citramon in foliated packaging cost 10-12 rubles.
Now it is sold only in foil packaging and a cardboard box with a bright color and the inscription citramon, but it costs 40-50 p...

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №140240
 06.04.2017
The moment when you choose to sleep instead of reading a book is common sense or old age?
WOW: This is a bad book.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №140239
 06.04.2017
Ferdinando: Tomorrow, by the way, there is a quest for Kafka.

Outsider: Oh God, this is really a puzzle...

Ferdinando: As it is not surprising, it was made by Russian.

Outsider: You know, your niche is not surprising!

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №140238
 06.04.2017
The administrators from the fitness club I’m attending are surprised that I’m stably going to them six times a week. The instructors of the same club wonder why I do drastically different exercises every day. And Satan is hectic about how my twin brother and I are doing one subscription for two.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №140237
 06.04.2017
How do four-year-olds know everything?

“Misha, why didn’t you close the door to Aunt Olle?
So she is married...

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №140236
 06.04.2017
Q: Will we ever be able to build a spacecraft fast enough to deliver humans to one of the nearest exoplanets in a lifetime of one generation?
WOW: Earth is a spacecraft with all the amenities. We are flying in space at an unimaginable speed on an autopilot. The door is locked - "protection from the fool". All we have to do is wake up and put it in order.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №140235
 06.04.2017
XHH: There was no electronic documentation, and there is no one. Everything on paper, soon it will be embarrassing to go out into the forest, to look the trees in the eyes.
The Dendroids.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №140234
 05.04.2017
From the Workers:
As my friend VDVshnik says, “If you don’t know what to do, then push yourself out.” But we’re not in the army, so I’m going to write a new regulation.

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