bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №99953
 02.07.2014
by Alexey: Hey
by Sergei: Hi
Alexey: How is it?
Sergey: You are straight like in the e2-e4 chess started))
Tribute to Traditions

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №99952
 02.07.2014
My colleague's mother gathered with her friends at her home for her birthday. They modeled different costumes, made each other makeup, hairstyles and photographed... on the monument...

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №99951
 02.07.2014
Y: And where do you live?
X: Artem
Very nice, but in which city do you live?
X: to smoke...

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №99950
 02.07.2014
What kind of music do you play right now?
and Vanessa May.
1: Who is this?
2: (disappointed) U-u-u...
3: The famous violinist from Thailand, special for electric scraping. But Zincchuk on the guitar is still better!
2 the zinc? This is who?
1 and 3: (chorom) U-u... :)

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №99949
 02.07.2014
For these hunters:
We went into the community "rat", meaning a thief. It is not a pity, but contrary to the fact that in your food, someone is constantly digging, then the cottage is crushed, then the sausages will bite off, then the milk will crumble off, then all the meat will be caught in the borst. We can't catch it, decided to find a cheap minicamera in the internet to put a hidden seam.

They burn without cameras. They try in the company to eat at the expense of others, at the general fee, either do not drop under different pretext, or invest less of everything in something cheaper (a bank of sea cabbage against meat on a shale, for example, - and what, he brought "eat meal"). They are always very interested in what you have in your pockets, in your bag, always ask for something you eat or drink, bite or swallow, trying to bite or drink more, although you will have your own not worse and enough. Typical phrases: "Oh, I’ve eaten it all, right? Ha-ha-ha!" when it comes to something delicious from the common table. Take a look and calculate.)

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №99948
 02.07.2014
Why should non-drinkers tolerate drinking alcohol?
Why should non-smokers tolerate smokers?
Why should dog lovers tolerate cats?
Why should vegetarians tolerate farms?
Why should Child-Free tolerate other people’s children?

In short, listen, you’ve gotten rid of it. Drop everyone on a deserted island, unless your parents have taught you that all people are different, and you have to somehow live together.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №99947
 02.07.2014
xxx: I have a telephone faster in the page load than my wife's galaxy ))) although also Samsung! )))) iPhone - for business, Samsung for entertainment - so in principle with two and walk )))

YYY: You can still carry a wheelchair for the ponts, 3310 for self-defense, Toughpad 4K to create a wow effect in the surrounding world.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №99946
 02.07.2014
Today in the store of household appliances saw a TV LG, on the price note of which was written: "TV LIE".

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №99945
 02.07.2014
(C of the Literary Forum)
I’m looking for books where there are demons and angels, war between them, or a demon, an angel or a man.
zzz; read the Bible. A world bestseller.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №99944
 02.07.2014
hemisink: I'm afraid to imagine what happens to manchucks if you overfeed them: they won't be able to get their legs to the floor :)
Gvaaranz: They will either crawl like goats or roll over. The fucking cute cats.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №99943
 02.07.2014
D: Sex with sex, but no Third Heroes before the wedding.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №99942
 02.07.2014
Advantages: The film is very transparent, soft, comfortable!
Disadvantages: Lost without a plan
Commentary: A great movie!! It is super!! I chose between a tablet and a film, I bought a film!!! Very pleased!! I look at her and rejoice! Very transparent, flexible, pleasant to touch, not even visible in the light! There is no tablet yet, the money spent on the film.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №99941
 01.07.2014
xxx: on the streets of France mourning - their football team has ceded to Germany and leaves the World Cup. The next rival will be the French team.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №99940
 01.07.2014
I remembered: I went to the hypermarket in the winter - in the pocket of the number: on the jacket, on the cart, on the child in the children's room...

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №99939
 01.07.2014
The night correspondence

I will embrace you in the morning.
Tag: I smell
I am a nurse! 😉

[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №99938
 01.07.2014
It is 3.14...ec, dear edition.
Shabash at the repair plant as a sharper (I come regularly three times a week). Freezers, drills, guillotine knives (plate metal machine to cut, not heads) and much more made of alloy steels and solid alloys.
Under this case, he purchased his abrasives (tapes, circles), assembled heads for fashion tools, special abrasives for keeping the angle and positioning relative to abrasives, etc. For a year and a half, everyone was happy. After my sharpening (correct surface processing, correct geometry of the tool, lack of release...) the tools worked better and longer and less went into use, even simple metal scissors.
Yesterday I wanted to take the force!) my self-employed console for the machine on which I was tapping the solid alloy mills.
Argument:"We need" and "why are you here so smart, we take the job". I pump the skill of the welding machine and in September currency to Poland for another six months. I cannot withstand here.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №99937
 01.07.2014
Video of 10,000 nuclear reactor launches in California
The commentary:

It lights blue because the American reactor in the Soviet Union lights red!

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №99936
 01.07.2014
From Habr about the graphene thread:
“On the one hand – like nanotechnology, and on the other – the teflon brass and scotch on the edges...”

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №99935
 01.07.2014
xxx: the phrase "Dear, let’s go to the ass today" significantly reduces the likelihood of divorce of a young couple ;)
Yyy: but the strapon pulled out of the pillow dramatically increases this likelihood!

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №99934
 01.07.2014
from the community. Discuss the failed trick of a motorcyclist on the road:

In the keno looked at beauty, and forward. Even today after the optimum of the prime I wanted to drown under four hundred. Glad you were on foot.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna