During the whole holy-war, I saw only one example of a truly feminist approach - about the family, where spouses support each other in self-realization and the search for a suitable job. And the princesses, waiting for her husband to beat every idiot who let go of the rough joke that hit her, are not feminists, but just the opposite, longing to hide from everything in life for a knight.

My wife brought me to meet my aunt. There is a chess board. I asked, can we play?
The championship was hardly at all.

– Shirt, and your Abrasha helps you at home?
“My Abrashah is one of those people who are most beneficial when they don’t do anything.

I stand in a line at the box, in front of me, a Negro pays for the purchases and goes out. I approach the box and see that there are 500 rubles in the box for delivery. The seller looks around to call the guy and return the delivery, and gives to the whole store:
Chunga Changa! You forgot to surrender!
Strangely enough, the guy realized that they were addressing him and returned for his surrender.

Alex Byev: Today in the match against Wales I saw how Russian football died
Jester: The Iron Birds disagree with you.

Dennis, change the monitor for me. It is impossible to work on this!
What does not please you?
Not all lines are visible.
I’ll give you another monitor.
I have a virus on that computer. Will they also be on the monitor?! to
I will be very careful when replacing.

The whole essence of any deception is to impose on the people of the first world the ideology of the second world.
by : : :
asceticism, altruism and pofigism.

xxx: Today there was an OPG attack "Red ants".
YYY: What is it?
xxx: An organized criminal group of eight or nine members attacked my leg.
YYY: The garden was watered?
XXX: Half of

I complained to a companion that it is not very easy to communicate with girls. Reply to:

Because we are deceived,
Our home, our home of birth,
First of all, the aircraft.
And the girls? Instead of boats, boats

Unfortunate translator
Concert of the Leningrad Group
Two hours will not fade.
He holds his middle finger up.

The public transport. The people in battle. A guy stands at the door, leaves out everyone and enters again. After another trip, I saw a friend. He asks him:
At what stop are you going out?
- The "Panoramas" And you?
On each one!

A former colleague came to work every morning and put a cake in the refrigerator, after him a woman came and put her food there. Thus, every time she opened the refrigerator, she saw different strawberries, but thought it was the same one... And two weeks later, the strawberry threw out a fresh strawberry so that the colleague didn’t get poisoned. It is said that his face was shrinking when his fireplace is flying in the wash.)

There was a case: the girl started drinking phenotropil to improve the brain and after a week and a half she left me.

Going for a new job. The boss’s name is Borch. Before giving out the non-illusory puzzles, he pronounces the phrase: Borscht begins to boil!!! A fun man in general.

Ulyan
I can’t remove the canyon from the violin.
Matthew
Did you put the violin on?
Ulyan
flies during the game and is glued
Matthew
Could not spiral?
Ulyan
No is. Tasting for a long time. It warms up and clings to the tissue.
Matthew
I can quickly heat up the solder, I tried.
Ulyan
Lifting lamp, construction fan, open fire.
Matthew
How many options, and you are friction
Ulyan
by old
Matthew
In the Stone Age, cannabis was warmed. Does your cannabis smell good?
Ulyan
I like the tree, the resin. Not very much. When I start playing, she starts smoking.
Matthew
It also tastes good when I catch it.
Ulyan
It smells different, it burns on the solder. I don’t drink that.

by Euro2016
ctokep: Russian national team of disgrace

A year ago she moved to Gelendzhik from Kazan. The director at the interview holds my Russian passport and asks if I have citizenship. On my O_o asked if Tatarstan is part of the Russian Federation.

Commentary on the film:

and ewgennn :
to see! Do not listen to anyone.

The Mocked Shell:
Recommendation from a person who makes two mistakes in the word "none", somehow alarms...

This thin line between throwing out and might be useful

I read the article that the members of the U.S. national team all appeared as asthmatics and drove doping is quite legal, unlike Russian athletes who use the drug to protect the heart from overload because it is punishable, so I decided to tell how I ate doping and almost won the ski race.
In the Soviet years of stagnation everything was good: and sausages with meat, and grass greener.
And I was at that beautiful time 12 years old, and since I, having cut half a circle through the park, won the school championship in skiing, I had now to defend the honor of the school in the district competitions. In a whisper to my ear, our classy promised to close my eyes on my walks and put a quarter trouble on algebra if I won the "district". I really wanted to win, because my father had a wide GDR leather belt. In a word, it was my only chance to survive.
When I came to the competition and saw the "loos" against which I was going to run, my optimistic attitude immediately swelled down. The fact is that now everyone has tweets and contacts, and then even computers were not in all schools.So it was difficult to find out who exactly came to the competition from school. What was used by the directors of most schools, exhibiting athletes from SDJUSHOR instead of ordinary schoolchildren. Who knew them in the face? No one! This was used.
Seeing my disappointment, Fima - my classmate, who was called to accompany me in exchange for official permission not to attend school on this day, issued:" here do not cut - flags around and at every turn people stand. In short, you need to eat purgen and doping.The first will reduce the weight, the second will speed up."
Since what purgen and doping we knew very approximately, then in the nearest pharmacy, just before entering the park, for 12 kopecks was bought "for the grandmother" drug with the inscription "laxative", and the role of doping got vitamin C and hematogen because the money still was no longer enough. Something bad I felt as soon as I swallowed the eighth laxative pill, snacking with vitamin C. Here suddenly announced the start and to visit the toilet, which was on the other side of the park, I just couldn't. After the announcement of the start of the competition and a shot from the launch gun, at the same time shot and my body, and with such a sound and smell that those standing behind me started only seconds after fifteen. How I ran away! I felt the urge of my stomach becoming unborn, turning my head trying to pull out at least one bush before which there would be no person. But the competitions were district and it seemed like the whole area came to watch them...These three kilometers I ran as soon as a man could run, a man sitting on a coll-I ran working with one knee, applying all the effort of the pelvic muscles to squeeze the half of my ass. My scream of “Ski, Suka” was blowing off the track not only of the person running in front of me, but also of the person running in front of him. This way of skiing had to be included in all the textbooks, because I came second. He received his silver medal of stainless steel and an honorary diploma. To be honest, I got a Fima, because at this moment I passed the finish, directly on the skies ran into the toilet and pulling in the course of the rafting gave a powerful stream into the cup of Genoa.
I got my three in algebra, but I proudly refused to participate in city competitions, referring to my studies. Life was just beginning.