bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №33278
 21.07.2010
No, yet to dismiss the boss and his bastard at once is cool, it’s our way. Now any contract-account-invoice-paper question resembles a quest or game "What? Where is? When is" A crowd of people gathered. They sit in a circle and start to remember when what was and where the documents went. Typical, loudly asked questions: "And who signed this in 2006?", "And why do we pay N thousand rubles a month to this organization?", "And why is it written on N, not M? Why at all? Do you know? This is crazy!"
Fun and not boring.

[ + 64 - ] Comment quote №33277
 21.07.2010
Talk to a half-sleeping father.
Father, give money for tomorrow!
Father (O) – I will not...
I will not be able to go to the institute.
Oh, and not to go.
Q. Will I go to sleep tomorrow?
Spy...

[ + 55 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №33276
 21.07.2010
Born, grew up, gave offspring, died
YYY: So it is time to die.
YYY: Although not, you are not right...not so all...
yyy: was born, grew up, gave offspring, paid out the mortgage, died

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №33275
 21.07.2010
XXX: The man today has met such a disgusting
First the door to the entrance in front of my nose clogged, then he did not respond to my greeting, and then he came on his foot in the elevator!
I’ve long regretted not being a cat. I would smell at the door, kneeling at the knee, the milk from the bowl would cheer so pleasantly, and then I would smash this guy into his pizzardic beige mosquitoes with his nose wrapped!!!! to

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №33274
 21.07.2010
by Peter:
I have dynamic ceiling alarm systems, they are like curved car, even two-band alarms. I want to hit them in the roof of the plaster and get them to the magnet on the balcony!

and Zhff:
The largest subwoofer in the world was made by the inhabitant of the Ural city Petro Baranov from his balcony!

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №33273
 21.07.2010
I had a story today, I wasn’t able to sleep this morning.)
At half six, I fell asleep by some noise...he heard a knock and one so monotonous? Clearly from the neighbors? The first to sleep.
I am already swirling, I can't fall asleep, and the knock does not stop, and so for less than 50 minutes...
I got enough, I got up, I'll go thinking about the kitchen water to drink, at the same time I'll see if everything in the apartment is already on my ears from this whisper.
So, the suspicions came when I opened the door from my room and knocked on my apartment!
I go to the kitchen and there is my father sitting and making the cuddles!! to
I am O_o... - "What are you doing?"
and he was so innocent - "and I couldn't sleep anyway, decided to crack down and eat..."
I am on the wall!

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №33272
 21.07.2010
Whiteman: Your pope is a pedestrian
Whiteman: if you remove the costume from the cage
She begins to fuck.
Whiteman: then whisper like exploded
Whiteman: the fox does not sit silent for a second
WhiteMan: so she has had very short days lately :(

[ + 56 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №33271
 21.07.2010
Entrepreneur and patron Savva Mamontov named his five children so that their initials were the father's name: Sergey, Andrey, Vsevolod, Vera and Alexander.
- You also need it, Igor: Ignat, Gioric, Olya (let the girl be Rudolph)))
with: better Elijah, Gandalf, Octavegin, Rambo. Where it will be.
Rambo is no more.
and the younger))

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №33270
 21.07.2010
I read another love novel from the Middle Ages, next to Mom, I play her:
-Damn they describe the food there, the comp is ready to eat... and I read the line - on the third guests served strawberries, and rare unusually tasty pomegranates..."
What my mom says:
So imagine how they were joking, and there was no toilet paper.

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №33269
 21.07.2010
1: fucking, I decided to get in touch - so none of the girls I wrote to answer my messages... :(
2: bone, sheet I ask 2 questions
1: Give it
Chapter 2: Is your page closed?
1: Yes Yes
2: second: and who can write messages to you?
1:...
1: Only friends
1 to Fuck

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №33268
 21.07.2010
Online consultation in the online store (K - Customer, M - Manager):
K is Hi. I need a kitchen mixer that would cut vegetables and cook soups!
M is called WOMAN.
K - Oh, thank you for the help. I will look for a wife.

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №33267
 20.07.2010
Eho: and my father has a tough... yesterday the phone crashed, it all broke down, the battery, the body, everything in different directions... after that did not turn on. So he did not think long, went and immediately, bought a new, exactly the same... in the evening comes and sprinkled me on the couch old, "on for your collection of clay." Well, I thought that it was really a phone cap...and everything was much easier it was dumb.)
You have great ancestors! Instead of charging the phone, buy a new one.

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №33266
 20.07.2010
thx (11:50:36 20/07/2010)
Did you get scared when you saw the size of my file?

yyy (11:51:16 20/07/2010)
She pretends to be dead in the event of imminent danger.

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №33265
 20.07.2010
xxx (11:52) :
Would you be beer?

yyy (11:53) :
Yes Yes

xxx (11:53) :
Then go for a beer and I will be happy.

[ + 64 - ] Comment quote №33264
 20.07.2010
xxx: I want to sleep... I wonder when I retire, will I have time to sleep before I get old-age insomnia?

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №33263
 20.07.2010

xxx(22:41:09 19/07/2010)
Is your appearance more important than your inner world?

yyy(22:41:36 19/07/2010)
I need the golden middle.

xxx(22:41:52 19/07/2010)
I have 18 cm.

yyy(22:42:30 19/07/2010)
I am waiting for you, come...

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №33262
 20.07.2010
From the game Lineage 2:
I have a lot of stuff in the warehouse.)
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
XX: I know, these are the tips of a woman’s breasts.
YYY: The idiot!

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №33261
 20.07.2010
yellow_pill
How long these Tuesday days are, like a whore to an elephant.
Karna
How experienced you are...
yellow_pill
There were a lot of Tuesday in my life.

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №33260
 20.07.2010
He took his wife to the birthplace. The second time. Oh, she didn’t have to say "I'll be back!"

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №33259
 20.07.2010
XHHH: that is the case: the iPad charges a week usually, and then I put it near the bed and in a couple of hours the battery is dead. Do you have a Geiger Counter?
Don’t look at him porn.
Shit... Fuck...

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