bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 30 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №99693
 26.06.2014
Time to return the limit. Too many people have gone. Moscow is not bullish.
_____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
and late. She has already broken you.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №99692
 26.06.2014
from Answers

Q: I earned 700 rubles, what to spend on?

The best answer:
A: On drugs, rum, women.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №99691
 26.06.2014
When I was a child, I sincerely believed that a black glasses icon meant that I was blind driving.
WOW: WOW, considering the skill of our visionary drivers...
The idea doesn’t seem so ridiculous, right?

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №99690
 26.06.2014
In the work of colleagues:
Oh, I’ve always thought, but why do you have a black bowl?
Tagged: color gamut
Oh yeah?? to
To drink black tea gathered by black people, you have to drink it in a black cup!

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №99689
 26.06.2014
Dear people, understand already, please, that clutter and clutter is not dependent on the city of residence. Just in Moscow because of the accumulation of business and everything else that requires such behavior, such people are more.
I myself am an indigenous Moscovite and in my life I have not been proud of this and have not cheered. In the village, where we have a house for 20 years, everyone treated us well, because we behaved the same way. My brother and I played with boys from both Moscow and local. No one ever made any claims against each other on this ground. Yes, most likely, the villagers were a little bit jealous, because we had more toys, but at the same time we unselfishly shared them. And the sharp corners were smoothed.
My father and mother were always ready to help the local people. Dad arranged one for himself to work. We bring books to the local library. And our neighbors who lived in the village were the best friends of the family.
And people like my family are not few in Moscow. Just because we don’t go anywhere, you don’t know about us. Humming, it gets it all.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №99688
 26.06.2014
Dmitry: the airplane of the Spanish national team was hit by lightning yesterday
Dmitry: the march of Zeus has not played the bet=)

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №99687
 26.06.2014
UNHCR and UN Security Council are important! Do you understand how international politics works?! to

Every country has its own selfish interests. Sooner or later these interests cross and a competitive struggle begins. Competitive struggle consists in energetic throwing shit on each other. At the same time, splashes fly in all directions, including those who have nothing to do with. The process of throwing shit is called politics. The one who loses the most. At the same time, America has a shield "We are for freedom!", to which it is reluctant to stick and behind which it is very convenient to hide absolutely the same banal selfish interests that every country on this planet, including Russia, has.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №99686
 26.06.2014
Aaa was agreed with an investment fund from the U.S. by autumn will be $ 50.
BBB has gone to the guess, I confirm.
ccc agreed with the investment fund from China will not be $ by autumn.
A great joke about three financiers!
Eee talked with a farmer from Shelanga by autumn a kilogram of potatoes will be $.
fff Talked to an investment fund from Uzbekistan by autumn said the workforce is imitating.
ggg was interviewed with an investment fund from Mongolia, asked what is the dollar?
Hhh Talked to the Investment Fund of Uganda, asked what is an Investment Fund?
Called with the investment fund aliens said that we are all shortly.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №99685
 26.06.2014
xxx: The troll is another troll
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
XXX: Hardly opened
xxx: and there are 2 tables "we opened up!"

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №99684
 26.06.2014
How is it female. Give me cowards with the inscription “I’ll lease them out” and then forbid me to wear them, no matter what anyone accidentally sees at work.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №99683
 25.06.2014
Danterina: We were in Kubinka (tank museum near Moscow). Do you know what delighted me? We walk around the pavilion with Russian tanks, and a few soldiers, 10 people, apparently, enter it. Probably brought them on a trip. These soldiers stand and look at a tank. It’s a long time, maybe 5 minutes. And then one of them says, “Now enough to watch him, in part, what did they not see?” I remembered the whole company and went on to watch :)

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №99682
 25.06.2014
<xxx> The enemy of my enemy is my enemy.
<yyy> deathmatch is what?

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №99681
 25.06.2014
How can you describe the state of the soul if, after reading the mistaken writing, the imagination of a young man instantly drew a minor alcoholic? ( by

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №99680
 25.06.2014
Yuri, you’ve been on the foreks. How to distinguish a normal from a cowboy?
WOW: Look at the scheme like this – you and another 200 lochs bet on red, and on black puts only 100 lochs. The program knows this and the joke is not visible. How do you think it will fall?
HH: Oh I understood it. What are normal signs? Give a reference.
I am normal and described it.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №99679
 25.06.2014
So, the old grandmothers in the rows were already at that time, but I remember a store where, in response to the indignant screams of the Aborigines in the row, one young lady said: be ashamed, people from far away came for their own. He was absolutely right! We bought the shui sausage. I don’t like you, mosquitoes.
_________________________
Old grandmothers and now EVERYWHERE defines infamous, prostitutes, drug addicts, alcoholics, bandits, etc., about which they always scream loudly - in shops, in the OT, sitting on the bench near the entrance :)
You made conclusions on an ungrateful ground. Unfortunately, not only you.
Believe me, much stronger prejudice in the regions to the Moscovites than the opposite. I hope that over time the regions will be able to get out of the economic pit into which they were driven by the disregard for the leadership of the country and the regions themselves, and then this stupid opposition of us to each other will end. Look deeper, an educated man will never allow himself anything like the described grandmothers (or do you and the young lady hate?It was everywhere, both in Moscow and in the village of Gadjukino. So what does it matter where we are from as long as we remain human?

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №99678
 25.06.2014
Kitz: I dreamed here that my legs were hellish hairy, straight like a hobbit. The dreamers assured that this signaled my indisputable dominance in the family and a slight threat to wealth in the distant future. But everything turned out to be more prosaic - exactly one day I sowed somewhere my favorite collasso... :(

[ + 30 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №99677
 25.06.2014
An American student, who came to Germany for an exchange, got inside a giant sculpture in the form of a vagina and could not get out of there for a long time. In order to bring the young man into the world, 22 firefighters were needed.
There are no words.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №99676
 25.06.2014
The law of three denials: Do not do, do not say, do not think what you are not asked for.
If you are not a telepath...
_____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Especially if you are a telepath.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №99675
 25.06.2014
CCH: Oh, a great picture from the director of the broadcast. A fan of the English national team reads a newspaper on the tribune. This is all said.
You just didn’t notice the thermos with tea. Brazil by Brazil, but no one cancelled the O"clock

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №99674
 25.06.2014
From Habr:
When it comes to the financial data of a huge organization, their loss is equivalent to disaster. I immediately recalled a similar story, when at the dawn of my engineering career I found myself repairing one customer – a serious structure that was legalized in the 90s. They discussed that their admin removed something inadvertently. “What happened to him?” I asked then. “Well, he’s sitting here in the basement for the third day now. We are waiting for the general, he will decide what to do with him," the bull-headed employee with a heavy chain on the bull's neck answered me seriously.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna