bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 106 - ] Comment quote №23498
 09.12.2009
In the bus.
Girl, stop ticking my bag in my face.
Girl: Close your mouth, she sits herself and she doesn't like something - it would be better to give up the place to the grandmother born in 1915 who stands in front of you.
Old lady: Girl, calm down, let her sit – you don’t see, she’s only a year younger than me.

[ + 148 - ] Comment quote №23497
 09.12.2009
Yesterday I witnessed why tears turn in the eyes and you need to put individual monuments.
Standing at a stop, the grandfather slowly crosses the road (seems to be very old and probably a veteran), stops and misses the cars, as he passes in the wrong place and goes very quietly... Even the pennies do not pass... But the young guy on the Lanser stopped and honestly 20 seconds stood waiting until the grandfather passed...
Bring it to everyone, change the world for the better!!! to

[ + 64 - ] Comment quote №23496
 09.12.2009
The failure ended the attempt of the creators of the film "on the game" using the title to protect the picture from downloads. The movie can still be downloaded on Google. As stated by the director, the following films will be titled "Download", "Free", "No Registration" and "Folder".

[ + 72 - ] Comment quote №23495
 09.12.2009
Latvia sells the city. Just for some 323 thousand American rubles. Can be delayed for 10 years. How about you?
Yyy: LOL, in Latvia cities are cheaper than apartments in Moscow.
xxx :D

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №23494
 09.12.2009
by Danya (18:45:09 8/12/2009)
I opened the ski season in the same weather yesterday.)

Julia (18:45:28 8/12/2009)
Wow, how is your neck?

by Danya (18:54:38 8/12/2009)
I opened a ski season, not a gay club :DDD

[ + 77 - ] Comment quote №23493
 09.12.2009
Who has the iron. Grandmothers selling seeds... Just giants of willpower, sitting in front of seeds and not eating them.

[ + 74 - ] Comment quote №23492
 09.12.2009
Fragment of the real dialogue in the Asche:
Tobias> Hi and fuck!
July> Hello to you!

[ + 87 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №23491
 09.12.2009
I sit and eat peelings. The cat goes wrong next to him, loyally staring in the eyes. Heavily breathing, I forge out the meat from one pellet and put it on a newspaper. She walked around, smelled and suddenly... began to buri his leg. The pelme that was in my mouth is falling out and I realize that I can’t have THIS anymore. There are four more on the plate. I eat the cake (I really want it!) and the meat, so as not to prevent the cream from leaking out, I put it on the same newspaper. After a while, I hear a pleasant whisper. The infection smashed all the meat!! to
Something we don’t know about our cats.

[ + 74 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №23490
 09.12.2009
Now the telecast showed a conversation Medvedev with the prosecutor-general Yuri Tchaika about the fire in Perm. According to Tchaika, the cause of the fire was non-compliance with fire safety measures, one of which is the absence of orderly numbers of fire extinguishers.

The fire! Take the firefighters!
I can not! There are no numbers...

[ + 64 - ] Comment quote №23489
 09.12.2009
Q: Are you not pregnant?? to
What kind of shit???! to
Fuck, you see what...

[ + 80 - ] Comment quote №23488
 09.12.2009
I live in Germany. A bell at the door.

I ask: Who?
The answer is "Cable. I need to check out."

I am afraid to open, suddenly a pumped man in a combination on a naked body! and :-)

[ + 82 - ] Comment quote №23487
 09.12.2009
I recently removed the dusted tooth of wisdom (the hell they grow wax) I am standing on the street, waiting for the guy to come after me. A full mouth of cotton, turned back to the road, so still three people asked the guy how to go. And only in the car I understood why they scratched so much from me when I turned around and cried that I could not say, the guy offered to look in the rear-view mirror - all the lips and around in the blood with the flow of bloody saliva ( scratched vigorously, and anesthesia acts, I don't feel that it flows) cheeks swollen, a vampire swallowed, fucking, horror!

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №23486
 09.12.2009
It would be nice to travel all the countries! What are you dreaming about?
To see the sharks crawl.

[ + 77 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №23485
 09.12.2009
I never understood...
Wassermann is the smartest.
Chuck Norris is the strongest.
Why Bruce Willis always saves everyone?

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №23484
 09.12.2009
Where there are two lawyers, there are three decisions.

[ + 44 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №23483
 09.12.2009
Once a family was on holiday in Egypt and decided to celebrate the birthday of their son. He was eight years old. We decided to order a holiday cake at the best hotel restaurant. The inscription was “8 years.” But the child was allergic to coconut, so the Arabs were strictly warned that no coconut, nothing coconut at all. And knowing the local mentality even attached a note "without coconut!!!" It has been emphasized several times.
As a result, a cake was placed on the festive table, all abundantly dried with coconut straw, as if someone specifically tried not to regret coconut, tried very hard, even decorated with a rose cut out of coconut. But the most important thing is the inscription, also made with a coconut stick.
8 Years - Whithout Coconut!!!

[ + 89 - ] Comment quote №23482
 09.12.2009
The gross axiom: borrow a person a hundred times money, or do another good deed... and then refuse at the 101st... and you will be a worse shit than the one who immediately sent to the her.

[ + 64 - ] Comment quote №23481
 09.12.2009
I support :
"I was in a change. During the lesson, he laughed at the structure of the human body."

[ + 131 - ] Comment quote №23480
 09.12.2009
XXX: Listen, you also like all the men do not use a washing machine?
YYY: No = No
XXX:So this is why we have so fast soil gel to end!
YYY: I don't think that because of this, men do not use them at all, they wash the body with shampoo that flows from the head...
XXX: Where did he go then?
YYY: Do you have a son?
XXX: 12 years
YYY: Tell him the type We have a very fast gel to start, you are better with saliva, so natural.
XXX: I’ll try it.
......
YYY: Hi...
XXX: What is the joke?! to
YYY: What are you talking about?
XXX:I said, the husband was rotting, the son was red, but the gel actually became less to go.
YYY...

[ + 88 - ] Comment quote №23479
 09.12.2009
The cat is a wool product of entertainment.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna