In Russia, if you steal small, you can soon see Magadan and Vorkuta, and if you steal bigger, then - London and Paris.

In the dining room at work.
What do you have of meat?
Cocktails and turkey.
What is a turkey?
and chicken.
and)))

XX: In general, it is strange to observe the rise of homophobia in a country where two-thirds of the population is raised by same-sex couples – mother and grandmother.

My younger brother did not speak until he was four years old. That is, at all. Everyone hears everything, understands everything, and no words. Parents drag him to the doctors, they say: he is healthy! (Time of the 80s) And then somebody has bored my mother-in-law and says, “And you scare him!” Well, my mother-in-law and now not big minds do not ah you with humor) turned on the gas with the pot, put the little to the plate on the chair and says: you look at the soup, and I am the. He hid in the bathroom. It stands and waits. The soup boils, the cover jumps, the steam rolls, the little stands watching. 10 minutes stood, leaned to the plate to disconnect and said in one phrase: here is a fool, b...y, went to the store and did not turn off the plate!

The woman left the house, taking all the equipment from the house:
Where were you at that time?? to
HHH: Near and far...
WOW: How is it?
In the neighboring room, but in the deep water.

<Tsd> hello people who talk with their fingers.
<Angelofnet> Tsd: We dance our thoughts with our fingers on the hills of keys.

Desperation: I stumbled on the naked breasts of the Aborigines from the illustration in the book “The Land of Sannikov” of the 69th edition, when your parents were still walking under the table.

Why not invent an epilation cream for men? I smelt my face, smoked, washed and finished.
It does not grow long.

Has your heart ever been broken? ?
The heart is a muscle, it cannot break.
Oh yeah, you are stupid.

What if an astronaut in space ends up throwing him back?
WOW: Oh, and if the gases will release it forward... we’ll get all the engines off, we’ll give the astronauts a peanut and viagra and they’ll fly on their own)))

Two top comments on YouTube to the most famous Bee Gees video (6.5 million views):
In such narrow pants, I would sing.
Shoes with sandals :)

Patent disputes between Apple and Samsung
xxx: apparently patented use of two fingers (multi-touch).
Read carefully: Apple has two fingers of one hand, the rest have two fingers of different hands. This is how it is drawn on explanatory schemes — and there are no problems with the patent.

300g of cognac – almost 3 granite glasses? I don't know in what dimensions you live, but the classic granite glass has a volume of 250ml, the density of your cognac find out for yourself and count, but I suspect that two glasses will not get, right? This is first. Secondly, real punks drink before the concert, during the concert and after the concert (and also fuck schoolgirls after the stop) and absolutely do not get stuck with the transfer of alcohol into unclear containers. Punks Not Dead!

C of Habra:
by k1b0rg:
The Japanese have toilets with access to the net.
by khanid:
Well, at least not with the auto-posting of received content on Instagram.
and Weageoo:
I’t be so sure.

xxx: Boy, I don’t have a very standard request to you
yyy: roll, friend, but remember I’m still heterosexual
XXX: No more
yyy: ಠ_ಠ

<River> How good it is that today is Saturday. Nothing to do, just like yesterday.
<ximik_mv> Yesterday and Saturday?! to
*** ximik_mv leaves the conference

We live on the fourth floor and our neighbors see us as idiots. They screw and repair on the fifth, and knock on the battery on the third. As a result, on the third doom, a hundred millimeters of drilling, and on the fifth, that we knock on the battery, and in fact we lie quietly and try to sleep.

Such a feeling that any new device will only work successfully as long as the box from it is carefully stored at home.

I am looking for a girl. participation in armed robbery. No intimate offer.

How did you lose weight so quickly after pregnancy and do not see stretches?
Nerves and divorce. and :)