bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №97593
 08.05.2014
BigBossik: It's all difficult here (to buy a big toy you need a pilot's license, to get a pilot's license - you need to know English, but with this I have had problems since childhood....Parents apparently in the bed with the flag of the USSR at night covered, so that nothing because of the iron curtain into my head did not flow...So from school foreign languages and I hate each other.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №97592
 08.05.2014
The girls are hugged! There are dozens of female characters there are so many men that you can count on your fingers! And there are some of the main characters almost dried up on the princesses and they are kissed! There are two boys! There are (almost) all the problems that only girls solve! There are several family couples, but of the six (and even nine) main characters, only one shows interest in boys! You say, the rainbow...

__________

I’ve never felt so motivated to see these pions.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №97591
 08.05.2014
xxx: You may know that I am not well with geography, especially when it comes to some unknown countries whose flags are not even in the instructions on the air refresher.

[ + 28 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №97590
 08.05.2014
@ar00t: Many are now thinking - whether to issue a passport, or better wait when Russia will be everywhere

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №97589
 08.05.2014
I go to the office where Vitalia is currently working. The brigade of their installers looks like mobile phones are pressed off by passers at night. He seemed to have worked before retirement in the KGB investigation department. At the reception, a little girl and the makeup of which Dracula is jealous. Yes, Vitaly himself is forever shaved and in the dirt, admin to chew him. But most importantly, the director over this zoo is a low, forever smiling, puffy man with a pursuit "Naf-Naf"!! to

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №97588
 08.05.2014
Remember, a student aunt came to us in communion to tell us about the harm of alcohol. They took us into a room and we went on to talk. I paid attention to her lecture when she painted a bottle of champagne on the board, a crab in it (bacteria, as she said) and explained that the garlic in champagne is because the bacteria crack. And pathetically asked if it was nice to drink a drink with gazes and bacterial bodies. And it would be nothing, but based on her lecture, this was the main reason not to drink alcohol.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №97587
 08.05.2014
"Miting Against Chaos"

The 40th millennium of the dark future has already arrived!! For the Emperor!! to

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №97586
 08.05.2014
Surprised by:

Only in Russia you are already serving with weapons, when passing the military-medical commission, you need to bring a certificate from a psycho- and drug dispenser, that you are not registered there!

Everyone has the right to go crazy. It is good that this process is monitored at least with some periodicity.

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №97585
 08.05.2014
I’m almost 30 and I understand that it’s time to reconsider some things.
XXX: The Matrix... Star Wars... The Terminator can...

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №97584
 08.05.2014
Dr. Morf: After recent events with Crimea, the headline of the news "Lviv buses will be collected in Russia" no longer seems so unambiguous.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №97583
 08.05.2014
7 May 2014, 23:19 (MSK)
Saakashvili said he will not drown despite the "wave" that washed him off

It was not a wave.
The water was dropped...

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №97582
 08.05.2014
Hobober walked through the hallway, he heard from the room where three girls lived, wild screams: "In the ass! Fuck it!" I looked, maybe something ;) They turned out to be banally dissatisfied with the set business plan. How boring to live.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №97581
 08.05.2014
First of May, nature, from the bushes a rushing perspiration is given, and a tragic whisper: - the pot does not boil

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №97580
 08.05.2014
Do you do any press exercises?
Well, unless the flooring in the position of cancer and scratching a cat from under the couch side =_=

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №97579
 08.05.2014
Over the past month, a dozen jokes have accumulated, to which the sea of comments about what the author is stupid.
I am curious, these are the same people who did not understand the joke about "roll on yourself", "operatively popping diving", "amplifier from magnetron" and other ironically-sarcastic?

It seems time to reopen the Captain Evidence section.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №97578
 08.05.2014
In the morning, going to work, my husband catches rubbish, we do not have a rubbish pipeline, there is a container at the bottom. Well, that day he was very in a hurry, ran past the container and already at the parking lot found a bag in his hands. Fuck, there is no time to go back, throw the garbage into the car (these were plastic packaging), such as in the evening after work, on the way back you can throw it out. Then put him back home, because he stopped again.
I tell my friend how my husband got stuck, and he says:
"It’s still a bit of shit, I’m like I’m sitting with garbage in the tram!"

[ + 21 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №97577
 08.05.2014
About the beef:
All my life I thought there was only one.

Meat and Turkish drums.
Who plays it? <Name and name> caterpillar! (The Moscow)

A survey was conducted at work. found another

Meat and salt cabbage!
It rolls on the floor, no one eats it! (The Black Land)

[ + 20 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №97576
 08.05.2014
Argentina’s manit negro is not trouble.
Kein ice zebra bobber - this is it!=)

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №97575
 08.05.2014
>>>>
YYY: Yes for God’s sake. Robots are better than people. Among the robots I have not met any idiots.
_________________________

It was you, comrade, with our car dealer just didn’t have a deal...


[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №97574
 08.05.2014
here
(Discussion of the photo where Aunt Toples washes the window)

O-va (13:29:56 7/05/2014)
Of course, I’m wildly apologizing for the fact that someone else is cleaning up at home?! to

Macluen (13:31:45 7/05/2014)
What is your address?

O-va (13:32:44 7/05/2014)
What is? The faces?

Macluen (13:33:01 7/05/2014)
Home of yours

O-va (13:33:07 7/05/2014)
December 29

O-va (13:33:08 7/05/2014)
and CHO

O-va (13:33:17 7/05/2014)
and

O-va (13:33:20 7/05/2014)
I understood

What city, what city?

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna