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[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №122495
 31.12.2015
We have children. During the holidays, a terrible shock from adult photographers, almost half of the parents spit out in front of the spectators and shoot their children. It hurts to watch.
I once sent my son a concert to the girls to shoot.He brought a photo of the back of the chair on which it was scratched.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №122494
 31.12.2015
If a girl pierces a condom (picking sperm, lying about pills), she is a fool and the child (morally)is her problem.
If a boy refuses a condom and then refuses a child, he is a goat and deserves the most complete twist on food and inscriptions on the forehead of the "irresponsible goat" (but not the honor and pleasure of raising a child. Why bear the goats?
if there was an accidental failure in contraception (gugliem pearl index), then this problem of BOTH partners and the "I am not in business" problem is that the goat is ordinary and crazy classical.
If both of them wanted a child and they were conceived with the voluntary consent of both parents, then this is their mutual headache for the next 18 years and the divanodavil body "I participated in it) who?washed! The fool is ordinary and deserves not a borst but a clutch in the ass. Tcheka

Feyenoord in this chapel and with the New Year

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №122493
 31.12.2015
here here :

Young people do not remember, but before the symbol of the New Year was snow. It was so much that excess was even taken by trucks and burned.

And the foxes took their fireworks, went to the blue sea, the blue sea lighted. :D

[ + 11 - ] Comment quote №122492
 31.12.2015
The scientific associate. Z / pl 10t.r Prize from 0 to 3. Technical specialty. Scientific experience 8 years.

[ + 34 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №122491
 31.12.2015
One day we saw with friends a girl (3 years old) with her father who first walked by the hand, and then the dad decided to joke, and pretended that his daughter doesn’t know at all, saying to her:

The girl! And you who?

She answered very harshly:

“I am your daughter!”

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №122490
 31.12.2015
I play online chess with an American.
Gone his king in the corner, I write in the chat "ha ha ha".
I forgot to switch the keyboard, it went "rf rf".

Also nothing.

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №122489
 31.12.2015
Not an anecdote. It was today.

In Moscow, near the metro “South-Western” (red branch) on the Vernadsky Avenue appeared a banner, which was to help figure out how to get to the station.

But somebody snapped - in the end, the banner is beautiful "South-Back."

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №122488
 31.12.2015
In a state of shock, you can even run fifteen meters with an open fracture of the leg, and then fall, because a broken leg should not run.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №122487
 31.12.2015
People who pay such angry grandmothers for heating are hard to convince to fight global warming.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №122486
 31.12.2015
As a technician, the final smiled at me.
From the NII-2, better known as the “Marphine Bowl”. About the seriousness of this office of history jumped here, I will tell, or rather, tell my own.

The security department is probably second in status after the secretaries. In particular, they make a verdict on the possibility of using a particular component in the products being developed. The parameters specified by the manufacturer exceed a couple of times, if the component can withstand, include in the list of permitted for installation in responsible devices. This time on the test button. Not quite a simple but still an ordinary button that has no right to fail to work or accidentally work at the most inappropriate moment. Tests for humidity, shocks, etc., all according to the regulations. Most importantly, the button must be pressed. The provider claims there are millions of unsuccessful clicks. Only there it was calculated by the formulas, and here the regulation is to check in natural conditions. After how many clicks the employee will go crazy, not checking. In the experimental production ordered a primitive mechanical finger. The idea is simple: two digital counters, one counts the fingers in the button, the other - the facts of clicks. In fact, for statistics, there are several buttons pressed with one push, not the point. Especially gambling even bets made when this damn button is broken. The day comes, the buttons have already developed the resource specified in the documentation, and the testimonials of all the counters coincide. The moment of truth has come. The account stopped. I could not withstand the pressure.
This type of button was unanimously decided to be allowed for use in combat equipment.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №122485
 31.12.2015
You laugh at Putin’s quotations. You have to take more exams on him.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №122484
 31.12.2015
One day, a delegation of the clergy appealed to Catherine II with a request. Priests said that at one time Peter the Great removed the church bells for melting into guns, promising to return them, but did not fulfill the promise. The officials of the church believed that Catherine now had to fulfill what the emperor had promised.

Surprised, the queen asked if the clergy had a correspondence with Peter I himself. “Yes,” the applicants gladly answered, “we have a petition to the Tsar.”

The document was handed over to Catherine and she read a resolution in which Peter offered his intimate organ in response.

After getting acquainted with the verdict, the Empress asked to give her a pen and ink and with her royal hand wrote: "And I, as a woman, can not even offer this."

[ + 16 - ] Comment quote №122483
 31.12.2015
“If the driver considers your processor to be Athlon, you might need to contact the seller of your processor.”

©Haber

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №122482
 31.12.2015
I am the husband of the 80th Level.
My wife just called me.
She went to the store to buy a dress.
The xxx:
She called me from the store.
I asked "What size dress would you buy me"
She did not know what to measure.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №122481
 31.12.2015
XXX: How is the last day of the year?
Hell is full!
xxx: read a bright picture about the "ad full": a man falls after a cleansing house in hell - on the way are carried by courts with movie porn stars, officials and partisans, he goes to hell and he is asked at the entrance - Have you booked? No, this is hell! Then go naked. Hell is full.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №122480
 31.12.2015
Fascially
I immediately felt like Jason.
Shyonsu
OO
Shyonsu
What is it?
Fascially
Well, at the bathtub, I picked up the wood, I thought tomorrow.
Fascially
I went to my girlfriend on the way.
Shyonsu
XD is
Fascially
Imagine me splashing wet, coming out of the elevator overweight with the saw... and she stands and smokes on the site, although she promised to quit.Well I her and the guard - "Who promised to quit smoking?"... I have never seen such facial expressions.
Shyonsu
Go to XD
Fascially
It didn’t go well, or maybe it fell down.

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №122479
 31.12.2015
She asked: Can I be proud of my loyalty to my husband if I am fat, depressed, living in the woods and no one offers me anything? c) Masha Rusova

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №122478
 31.12.2015
I still do not lose hope of losing weight by 9 kg before the new year.
Yyy: Mom, today is 30 years old.
Cut your leg is the only way.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №122477
 31.12.2015
Miracles of Mathematics

The chance of becoming pregnant with the spiral is 1/50 per year, not for the rest of your life, so for the 5 years it is put on, the total is already 1/10. Is it little? O_O

Five of them, the dish. They are reproducing.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №122476
 31.12.2015
denisis 25.12.2015 20:58 #
mistergrim wrote (a):
Genrix wrote (a):
An honest 480p is quite enough for a movie at home.
128kbps is quite enough for home music.

256kb/c dual-lap is quite enough for the internet, 64mb of opera is enough for everyone, 30fps in games is the same thing, the human eye still no longer sees, ears do not hear, brains do not think, and only hands write nonsense.

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