bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №20942
 01.10.2009
The Club Forum:
Hello dear forum members! Broke the bumper and the lights. The driver’s and front passenger pillows worked their way, and the front seat belts were locked. What to do now?
Are you still sitting there?

[ + 86 - ] Comment quote №20941
 01.10.2009
Anyone who loves animals, please help me.

There is a ugly man who thinks of himself as a veterinarian and who torments animals very hard!

I need as many people as possible.
Please connect all your friends.

I need your help very much. and very insignificant. just call him and tell him what you think of people who steal a cat into a shoe with their head and without anesthesia castrate, who without anesthesia, if the dog laughs, burns her voice bands and advises people that their animals don’t throw on others while walking burn their eyes so that they don’t see almost anything.

Please help me!! to

8-985-two five seven seven two zero nine. His name is Sashurine

P.S. for your favorite cats! Please miss this quote.


[ + 106 - ] Comment quote №20940
 01.10.2009
When Timothy sings, all the singers are silent, because birds cannot sing and whistle at the same time.

[ + 73 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №20939
 01.10.2009
to this

In Thailand, at the show of transvestites, five minutes before the start, someone from the party shouted at the door through the whole hall: "Cola, come here, soon to begin!"" At which the drunken roar of a huge man came out of the door, who also replied to the whole hall: "I'm looking at the pyodoras in Moscow, and here Hennesie shakes in the lobby!";


The great Russian man, you are my God!! to

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №20938
 01.10.2009
The C Forum:

" the girls The instrument is sterilized. To me, my manicure has been going for a long time and exactly sterilized the tool. I will write more accurately, and so far I can only say that most dangerous viruses die at temperatures up to 80 degrees Celsius!!! And it’s up to 90..."

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №20937
 01.10.2009
What kind of nick do you have on Skype?
yyy: nu_hot_etot_nik_svoboden

[ + 117 - ] Comment quote №20936
 01.10.2009
A friend went to Chicago for a year. His history of life:
He decided to rest from Russia and went to the United States to work. I go from work on the bus. Late evening, in the bus person 8-10. the mood is good, had time in the bar to miss a couple of bottles of beer, the soul is singing. I decided to have fun and laugh at the Americans. He took it and shouted to the whole room: “Americans are pudders!” Here the one sitting next to him in pure Russian says: "pohorno pydory". Then from the middle of the salon: "Moscow, what do you lie, do not sleep". Then another replied, “Because they’re the pids that you’ve come here.”
Rest, fucking, from the homeland

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №20935
 01.10.2009
girl: and I used to think that if you go through Medvedkovo station, you can leave Bitcevsky Park.
Did you think Moscow has the shape of a ball? O_O

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №20934
 01.10.2009
Announcement at the entrance:
Dear tenants, in connection with the start of the heating season, ask all who do not have batteries to install them. Congratulations to you"

[ + 61 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №20933
 01.10.2009
To all of you!!! to
(sin(30)^2)* 8*cos(60)+tg(45)

The good half of the idiots and the little ones.

___________________________

I'll tell you so, schoolchildren and stay.. this is the equation of the 9th grade... 7 years ago I would have counted it in the mind for 5 seconds... now in emphasis I don't know what this expression is equal... =)
It is better in this case to insert a piece of code and ask to find and correct the error... then all quotes will finally be with IT deviation =)
++++++++++++++++
(sin(30)^2)*8*cos(60)+tg(45)=(0,5^2)*8*0,5+1=2
Shame on you guys!
Rostislav Andreevich, 67 years old
_________________________________________
(sin(30)^2)*8*cos(60)+tg(45)=(0,5^2)*8*0,5+1=5
Sorry to you =)
– – – – –
(sin(30)^2)*8*cos(60)+tg(45)=(0,5^2)*8*0,5+1=0.25*8*0.5+1=1*0.5+1= 0.5+1=1,5
Oh guys, what school did you go to? and 0))
--------
It’s not yours, but we’ve been taught that 0.25*8=2, not 1 :)
------------
I personally understood one thing...
All the writers of Bora :D

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №20932
 01.10.2009
De La Prada: We recently had such a joke in the universe...
We played cards at will.
One boy was left in a mess and he was told to go to his grandmother and say, “I want love.”
Well, he long thoughtlessly found his grandmother, said "I want love"
And she gave him 10 UAH (50 rubles) and said "luckily...")

[ + 72 - ] Comment quote №20931
 01.10.2009
Q: Where did the heating go?
Stratus: So, it seems, the test inclusion was
S * A * M *: Did you like it? Send SMS to the number.

[ + 104 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №20930
 01.10.2009
The Internet God exists.
The third day (without stops) hit StreetFighter 4 from Rapida. If you suspend or turn off the computer, it will not work. If the connection breaks down, the same thing.
There was one hundred percent left, I sadly (but hopefully) looked into the screen of the Opera downloads. Under the table, I whispered my legs, turned UPS, and so on. And suddenly... I didn’t hold the interruptor, he turned to the side, grabbed the wire from the modem, the modem falls, the cable flies out... I raise my eyes and see literally a second before the fall appeared the inscription “the boot is complete.”
That’s how they become believers.
-------
Atheists have uTorrent.

[ + 72 - ] Comment quote №20929
 01.10.2009
The topic on the forum dedicated to intimate hair:

Danik
I welcome this, I have everything under zero and my wife too.

O_O

[ + 79 - ] Comment quote №20928
 01.10.2009
A spokesman on the radio said:
Now in Ivanov and its surroundings, including in Moscow, 7 hours 10 minutes.
Young man, I respect you!

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №20927
 01.10.2009
to this:
Not only is Wi-Fi not everywhere, they also limit the session to 30 minutes and 15 MB (on Pure Proud). It is underground! They would still hang code locks on the toilets.
In the Ukrainian macdacs always stood code castles. The code is on the cheque)))

[ + 75 - ] Comment quote №20926
 01.10.2009
from the discussion.
How should a real gentleman behave during a mine?
Yyy pretends to have seen nothing and goes out silently.
The real gentleman doesn’t make a coin!

[ + 84 - ] Comment quote №20925
 01.10.2009
For a long time I struggled to work with one guy who was constantly taking everything without demand. He punished himself:
There were no ashes at the computer table, and I shrugged the ashes into an empty bottle of tea. So that the bull did not smoke, it poured water there, about a third of the bottle worked out. He, as always without demand, grabs a bottle and begins to drink... Rushing up with a bull, makes a surprised face: "And that you were silent, what a bull?" "And you asked?"
I thought he would at least ask...
Fuck it there! He started splashing only after THE THIRD time "Halva"!
For the fourth time (there was a Pepsi Bank) he still asked, "There is nothing there?"" And without waiting for an answer, he drinks... The Bull found him this time.)))
And you speak reflexes, reflexes... Pavlov’s dogs learned faster than others.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №20924
 01.10.2009
More people are eager to change students in class

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №20923
 01.10.2009
I was told a story recently.

“We were sent on a trip from Moldova to Nikolaev. Driving
by Kamaz. Arrived at night, decided to stay overnight on the base of the bridge.
The driver ran into the bedroom, I settled in the cabin on the seats. Three seats are comfortable to sleep.
The third of us did not want to stay with us in the cabin, took the mattress and used to arrange for the night up, on the body. He already knew - we won't let him sleep in the cabin - he sneezes.
In the middle of the night they knock on the door of the cabin. I woke up and looked like:
What is?! to
“Come out and see,” said the guard angrily.
We go out. We see. Our truck was roamed, probably, with twenty dogs, all mourning to us. The third sleeps on top. and grumbling. As soon as he releases another roll, all the dogs begin to laugh together, and loudly, and while the third continues to snore, the dogs laugh.
Dogs laugh, the guard can’t sleep. I had to move to another place, away from the guard and her frightening dogs; well, the bridge squad is located on a large territory."

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