bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №85429
 11.08.2013
Saints Row 4 Super Dangerous Wad Wad Edition sold for $1 million
Per the most expensive boxed version of the game in the world was presented by the publisher Deep Silver. Saints Row 4 Super Dangerous Wad Wad Edition is sold for $1 million.
The Super Dangerous Wad Edition package includes a week's rest at Dubai's most prestigious hotel, a week at Jefferson Hotel in Washington DC, Lamborghini Gallardo and Toyota Prius cars, a model of a dabe-step gun, participation in hostage rescue and espionage training, a suborbital flight on a Virgin Galactic aircraft, plastic surgery, a personal helicopter, first-class airplane tickets and some other little stuff. Saints Row 4 Super Dangerous Wad Wad Edition is sold in a single copy.

They don’t joke about advertising.)

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №85428
 11.08.2013
The daughter in the first will go)) Well I too)) Today asks me " Mom, and what is hypotenuse?"..I answer..."The cut that connects the 2 sides of the triangle, which are called cathetes") I thought the theorem of Pythagoras to lump.. changed my mind.. I ask "And why do you?".." And grandmother always says...I will break your hypotenuse") Well I sat there))

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №85427
 11.08.2013
When I say don’t touch me, it means don’t touch me, but not always.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №85426
 11.08.2013
The wealth of words hides the scarcity of sentences.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №85425
 11.08.2013
About the story No. 2 about the ATM and the Lieutenant.
In the early 1990s there were many banks, straight like mushrooms after the rain. And they chose the names, not giving special insight to their meaning.
One of the scientific library institutions near the center of Moscow entered such a bank (or rather, it was given a part of the squares). The sign was if not on the whole, then on the half of a gentle wall, visible from a distance: "Ipotec Bank" (although it was unlikely that the word "Ipotec" was known at that time, even the employees of the bank itself). Since the institution was semi-closed, the employees of the bank were called to the guard stands, where the main transactions took place. There was a price list here. And the services were not always understood by banks.
As a graduate student, I went to work at the library. I stand, wait for the pass to be issued to the reading room and watch such a scene. A young woman approaches and asks, “How can I get a loan in your bank?” And the bank worker answers: “Put the money onto our bank account and then you will be able to borrow 80% of your account.” Well, the woman’s next question was quite logical: “Why should I then put my money on your bank account?”

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №85424
 11.08.2013
I watched the government meeting on television, seemingly all the smart people, but then they spoke.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №85423
 11.08.2013
Why don’t you always take your cell phone?
He usually lies far away when I’m home.
I usually put close: suddenly someone will call.
I usually put away: suddenly somebody will call...

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №85422
 11.08.2013
The name of weapons. I’ve always liked the grenade to the submersible grenade "Drop"

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №85421
 11.08.2013
Discovery "Destroyers of Legends" The acceleration is called joules. The pipet. The translator is fucking.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №85420
 11.08.2013
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
The greeting! You are sexy!! I want to give you a sea of affection and tenderness, will you receive this gift?

thx 25.01.2013
The greeting! You are sexy!! I want to give you a sea of affection and tenderness, will you receive this gift?

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Good night!

by 09.08. by 2013
What about the sea of affection and tenderness?

H to 09.08. by 2013
I would like to give it to you!

WOW 09.08.2013
Thank God, I thought I forgot the words.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №85419
 11.08.2013
Go to the recipes:

But here’s how most famously signed our grandmothers’ bottles with strawberries and jam! My hands are - "YAD-2011" and "AD-2013" (apple jelly and apricot jelly"). There is also a favorite - "Viscus" (cheese with bones).

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №85418
 11.08.2013
to this:
"After working day on my heels - my erogenous zone"

After a working day in Kirsak in the summer! The legs are an erogenous zone.
I think a lot of men will confirm.)

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №85417
 11.08.2013
To that!!! to

Someone here recently said how great it would be to forget all the passage of the second fall and feel all those feelings again. I am jealous of you, mortals. I went through the first fold in my time. The second was not enough time (institutes, then family and responsible work). I have not watched any passes or youtubes on this topic. And now, fifteen years later, when all the kids are already living virtually their lives, you won’t believe I’m betting on my android.
_______ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___

Where do you get her???! to

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №85416
 11.08.2013
Stanislav: I was here a few days ago admired by the Chinese honesty!I had a Chinese sewing machine for 3 thousand.There it is written that the service period is 3 years.So it is!After the deadline collapsed :-D.Two days I tried to repair it, spit and went to the extreme measures - gave to my husband.He was driving a clock, put it in a garbage bag and pulled it out of my asshole 10 pieces.Now I have a new machine with a huge number of operations,I was sewing everything I could for two days.
Soxatyi: Conclusion – more often trust the repair of equipment to your husband. Upgrade your entire home arsenal.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №85415
 11.08.2013
to this:
Once we got the recipes. In my mother's notebook, the names of the recipes were usually received either by the source (from Tania, from the grandmother of Clava, etc.).Or by ingredients. It was very fun to see the series: Salad from beets, Salad from seafood, Salad from TV...

My mother in this spirit had a recipe "Salat with Vera Borisovna cookies"...

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №85414
 11.08.2013
Vasya: Oksana said that we have all either frogs or homosexuals. What to do?
Boot_from_cd by Quake

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №85413
 11.08.2013
Once we got the recipes. In my mother's notebook, the names of the recipes were usually received either by the source (from Tania, from the grandmother of Clava, etc.).Or by ingredients. It was very fun to see the series: Salad from beets, Salad from seafood, Salad from TV...

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №85412
 11.08.2013
Do you suffer without me?
and no. I suffer with you.

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