Online chat games:
Ork: Sec, my clothes are washed.
and my disguise)
Orc: I hope you have a bed, not a lower bed.
What if it is below?
Ork: So then you wash again...

In Novosibirsk, after the scandal with Tangier, the Ura-patriots are now called gay Slavs.

X: And the circus is gone.
X: (A few minutes later, fun).... but not all!

I saw a beautiful thing in the online food store. There are beautiful boxes on the stand, and it is written on them "Luke shell for coloring eggs", the price is 60p. ... And 2 meters from this stand is a vegetable section, in which it is quite free to lie on a 32 ruble-kilogram beetle with the same shell.
I don't know, maybe we have some sect of crocodile haters, but lovers of onion-painted eggs came up, but the onions of this in the store at least got stuck, and a box of only 2 and remained.
This is one of the most important things in the world.

The inventor is a genius marketer.

I can only envy the ability to extract the bubble from the garbage.

[ from the answers ]
xx: I still wanted to ask you, I started drinking Elevit, well on the 2nd and 3rd day of reception started to get sick from them?
yy: "2 and3day" - what is that mat?! to

Bad mood is a guarantee that no one will ruin your mood.

Parents’ Day at the Pioneer Camp.
A little girl in a pink dress asks:
Father, take me away from here.
Grandfather (in a fighting shirt, shorts and with numerous stickers):
A camp is a camp. The deadline must be completed in full.

I already see the following project Mikhalkov: - network of travel agencies "Sit at home! " “Sleep with your wife!”

Gagarine is Flying!
Really Flying

Immediately recall quotes, as someone scratched eggs with garlic, peppers or other hands.
So I immediately think that at home you are not only cooking without gloves, but also without pants.
There is something to try in the guests...

With spicy pepper is quite real and in normal sanitary conditions. The fact is that capsaicin (a substance that provides burning pepper) is very poorly dissolved in water, but perfectly - in fats. Therefore, it settles well on the hands (no one cancelled skin fat) and is badly washed with water when washing hands. T.o If you go to the toilet even an hour and a half after cooking (and regular hand washing, of course) and touch the sensitive skin with the hands on which capsaicin remains... But wiping your eyes with these hands is even worse.

"Response to"
How to start a relationship?
NN: Specify with whom. With a girlfriend, with a guy, with the tax police?
by: Yes
The NN:

XXX: Can you reinstall my window?
Yyy: But you just bought a laptop, you have a new window.
You are stupid, do you not understand the hint?
YYY: You can’t reinstall the screw, and I’m stupid?

XXX: I had the most idiotic phone conversation of Eva right now:
and allo.
Is this Jeanine Vladimirovna?
You mistaken the number.
How it was wrong. not wrong.
Who do you need?
by Jeanne Vladimirovna.
There is no one here with that name.
As it is not, it has always been, and not now.
It never was.
No, but I’m calling by your number.
- Well let me check the number (he actually dictated my number, and he called me in my opinion already with the exact same result)
I keep silent, he continues, complaining:
Jean Vladimirovna...

All these conversations about the culinary show "July" and more remind me of my wonderful grandmother. The women of our family were always wonderfully cooked and conservation in Soviet times went on the hurdle. At one event with a bunch of different guests, Babula pulled the cucumbers out of the bench and, Horrible! with her hands. One guest made her a comment: why not a fork. The grandmother replied that the hands are clean, and so faster and more comfortable. The guest didn’t get along and said that it was just ugly and someone might cheer to eat the cucumbers they got with their hands. My grandmother said, let these crazy people know that I also put the cucumbers in the bowl with my hands. So guys need to be a little more tolerant) through the kitchen I try not to drag anything, but the bones of lemon, for example, before adding to the paste, also get my hands. I often wash my hands in the kitchen.

In the original quote, the man expressed some concerns about the fact that a woman who cooked in a television show would be somehow linked to the catering network. But why you, dear friends, began to tell each other, who in the kitchen should where tomatoes to carry, you fuck knows, to be honest.

from ZH
Daddy, Daddy, why don’t we paint eggs?
Because son, we celebrate the day of spaceflight, not a successful imitation of a suicide attempt.

MDA...

Uzbek people are strange. They just want to work, for example, we wait for the crane, we need to raise 40 15-meter boards on the roof, we folded them carefully on the bottom, climbed to the roof. No crane, I’ll tell you in an hour. Okay, full of other work, but no, prorab went to the city, left for the elderly one Jamsut, he ores to pick up in the hand! How many of his Russians (I and Serega) did not convince me that it was still necessary to pull the dome, tie the armor, etc. No, he’s stuck, I need to raise the boards. Ok to Ok. One person from the bottom breaks out our careful stack, carries it to the other end of the building and binds it, two people from the top lift the rope with the board. And so for an hour. As a result, on the thirteenth board came the crane, threw the remaining ten boards in a minute and left. The Uzbek people never understood why I was crying and laughing.

If you have appointed the prorab of the Uzbek senior, you are very foolish builders.