My six-year-old daughter’s hair, I water her head out of the shower.
Mother, don’t drop my brain!
I am 0_0
“Well, you pour water, it gets into my ears, and from there it drops into my brain.

His laptop under Gento is so rough that it charges from the connected iPhone.

Hi, let’s meet you?and :)
Did he smell the grave?
Oh sorry not you.
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

From Habr:
Some vacancies hang for six months, and when you come to the interview you see a fantasy.

What are your achievements?
The accomplishments? With a salary of 20,000 rubles per month!!! I have both eyes and I don’t wear my pants.

<SAPRO> Here is the MTS wholesale service! I called them "Hello! In the subway, your network does not catch from Taganka to Ryazan Prospekt. Previously caught, and on the cover map is drawn what caught." - "Thank you for your call, I made the application". I watched it in a few days and it was repaired!! Remove these stations from the coverage map.

To save their face, women use makeup, men use scars.

Polygon, district center and clinic.
Table on the office: Dentistry.

A really cool person is not one who buys a car to go to work, but one who buys an apartment near work to walk there.

xxx: Thank you to everyone who supported the veterans of the WOW on Twitter. We are far more than those who do not yet understand the meaning of the Great Victory.
YYY: All right, Twitter support is just what veterans are lacking.
You have a lot of things missing in life. But respect and gratitude, if you know these words, is not in the last place.
yyy: The question is whether veterans are familiar with the word "Twitter".

Nicole
Was there anything before the creation of the universe?

Favourite
Black emptiness... and a lonely console.

The minor TP, who ruined a family photo session with a child, showing the "fact" in the background (Volgograd, onshore), - I hope your children will be smarter than you. Print what, your face and glue half of the city?

eulenspiegel7: I don’t know how Dallas’s plan is, but in early Russian marriages there is a huge plus – by the years 25-27 there are large flocks of light and still fresh prey (women or married, who have been bored by their husbands for 5 years before horror).
Father, you are a cynic.
eulenspiegel7: I'm not a dog, and the word "Fu!" won't stop me when I see a delicious wild :-).
eulenspiegel7: A "Fi" - so much more :-)

xx: Aqua parks are generally amazing places full of surprises, I once jumped into the pipe in a swimsuit, and ran out without it.
Yy: Surprise, it’s if you ran without a swimsuit and ran out with it.
zz: with the next descending it happened

Argus [9:26] Hello!
The Joker [13:17]
Argus [13:20] Hrenase you are brake
Joker [19:46] as I can))

I read another quote about the installation of a windscreen at a girl's house. I have been asked many times to put the window at home. I came... and put... a window...
I wonder if I’m stupid or I’m exaggerating.

I realized how small he grew up when he walked over his head opening the upper door of the refrigerator.

Barnauley is the capital of Altai honey!!!! to

If you give a student a course topic, you can understand who he is: a historian, a mathematician or an ornithologist.

When you are trying to download a run control app on your phone, and you are, first of all, offered to download "Run, cow, run" from the list of possible - it is, you know, offensive.

What compliment to a girl?
What is the name of the girl?
Theme: Olesya
Say that if you were a transgender, you would have taken the same name.