bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №106831
 15.12.2014
by Tilka_Beermaker

He was offended by Hajime.
It is the best antidepressant.

Sitting is bad. We will all die, don’t worry, drink wine.
Around the goats. They will also die, don’t worry, drink wine.
Wages are not paid? Hayam: they will die, there is no need for money, drink wine. And take it.

And with the hand all the depression, as with the hand...

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №106830
 15.12.2014
Apparently soon the price of passing in the subway and therefore measures were taken - 3 tokens in-hand.
I stand at the box.
A woman quarrels - her class to take on an excursion, you need 20 tokens. It is called lower. She points to the crowd of children behind her — say look, I am not lying — but the cashier is a pooher. The woman is fooled by saying that she is like she is 7 times in a row to defend what??? She says - with a dew - well so for the sake of the children stand and we have the rules. By the way, the token sales machines were turned off. The teacher says the cashier - they asked themselves! Give every child 100 grams. Each child purchases three chips. 2 to the teacher.
The Profit.
A cashier in shock from the naeba system

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №106829
 15.12.2014
Inflation affects all spheres of society.
Bordels in Murmansk have raised their prices by 30-40%.
In the future, they may even be attached to the dollar"

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №106828
 15.12.2014
I'm embarrassed to ask, but by the name, by the advertisement, you didn't know where you were buying tickets? Or did you specifically sacrifice yourself to let us post this emotional report here?
The problem is not in religious propaganda, but in the collapse of education and the return to medieval ignorance of the unread population.

You are wrong, man. I don’t think there are idiots in these theaters either. They understand that if you call things by their own names (for example, in this case, you should write "Religious Sermon" on the poster), then no one will go to them. The show could well be called, say, "Night before Christmas," in order to filter out all the lovers of devils and witches and purify them of the spiritual scratches. Or there "Christmas fairy tale" is a niche name that attracts the growing generation. Advertising is advertising to cut the hair. In reality, it usually has no relationship.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №106827
 15.12.2014
My husband is busy. Libido below the plinth. If after marriage I still asked “Where is my sex?” then now, 10 years later, I stopped asking. We live in soul. Not everything is measured by a member.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №106826
 15.12.2014
Mom bought a stupa and a stunt....Well, I joked.....In Odessa style: "Mom, I understand everything, but just don’t make a dead loop!" 2 weeks we don’t communicate

That’s like getting my aunt to buy a stitch and a stitch, right?

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №106825
 15.12.2014
Birthday is something unusual. The children are off, the husband is on a business trip.
True, a man from the North ordered the delivery of a bouquet.
My daughter also bought it.
The younger children painted bouquets.
The man brought the rose.
In short, my flowers are like funerals.
WOW: Here’s what you don’t need to want, that’s a sense of humor, that’s in excess!
Oh, Caps himself struck, so I tell the truth!
XH: Is this the new Internet sign? and lol:

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №106824
 15.12.2014
XXX is
It is original! did not know. Jew + Chinese - a child of the type of Latin will probably be successful. Let us wait. I want to show you a picture of the child. By the way, according to the Torah, a child can no longer be considered a Jew. by Imho.
Reply to
YYY
Are you racist?
XXX is
What about race? Racists are when the Negro trolls and the rest of the people are not Negroes.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №106823
 15.12.2014
In the very heart of the forest is a super-thick super-massive guerrilla, curling space around itself, so the large masses of people entering deep into the woods paint never to return from there.

[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №106822
 15.12.2014
If for a long time not to bear saliva from the cellar, the cellar becomes a saliva.

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №106821
 15.12.2014
Tamke was 6 years old, insulted him for something, sitting, swollen.
The husband approaches him and asks:
What, Timothy, is your mother strict?
The child responds indiscriminately:
Dad, you had a choice, and I got that.

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №106820
 15.12.2014
The course of the ruble has overcome a psychologically important mark - "no matter."

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №106819
 15.12.2014
The 5 minute...
The new joke:
A friend calls a girl at 7 in the morning, all in tears: a cat escaped from the aquarium! It was 😉 😉 😉 😉 😉 😉

(Based on real events) 😉 😉 😉

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №106818
 15.12.2014
<...> The high-quality drinking machine has always been in the price of what was then, what is now.
--------------
By the way, o...
I read in Inet about the excavator, 5 years ago.
I went to the office for an announcement. Threatened like a half-man.
He comes, therefore, into the footage, they talked, and at the end they ask him: do you drink vodka? No, he is answering. You do not fit us...
Chewooo? →? to
In general, they explained to him: if he does not drink, then he will have to pay the promised penny. And if the bosses smell the smell, then remove 50%, and the foundation of wheat. The fees are saved and everyone is happy with each other.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №106817
 15.12.2014
to this:

I think the current situation in the economy reminds me of a “civilization” game, when things are getting worse and worse, despite any effort.
The people of the city are unhappy - let's hold the Olympics!
A sharp improvement in happiness, but the money became noticeably less.
Increase the salary of police and firefighters. Not bad, but there is no more money.
A small winning war – new resources! However, there were no resources there, but a lot of money had to be poured into the infrastructure and fed the eagle of people.
Release the currency for free navigation. No, something didn’t help
Increase the CB rate. We impose counter-sanctions! We speak comforting words. Give up the jpg! Deal with India. No does not help? ( by
At the end of the game, there is a game over.
And we did not survive.

The main thing is that in the same
the DOOM decorations did not start ((
— — — —
The most important thing is that "DUKE NUKEM" and "Fallout" do not start!

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №106816
 15.12.2014
The Scary:

>>>I still remember all the gods before the take-off, and here the wings are surrounded by Scottish clowns.

Relax, this is most likely a protection against frostbite.

[ + 31 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №106815
 15.12.2014
Don’t worry, the euro and the dollar can’t cost more than 99 rubles, as the electronic billboards are designed only for two digits.
and c)

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №106814
 15.12.2014
Where is?! to
A straight line that needs to be placed. But all
The trouble is that they can plant (and plant) on this.
for completely harmless things, for example,
for what you said to a nice colleague: "you today
You look good" You wanted without any subjects.
Make a man pleasant, and you have a time.
— — —
Where you've heard and seen this - a sprinkle in the studio! You are told in direct text by those living in this rotten capitalism that there is no such thing, you do not have to invent it, and you are again for your own. Think about who and when told you this, and why you believed him.
P.S I live "there", married to "Americos", smiled at me and invited me to lunch without any fear of being arrested for harassment, oh. And around me, chatta couples often form, marry and have children. They have not disappeared, and yet they are not going.

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №106813
 15.12.2014
Only now came the realization that we will not give our old toys to our children. Instead, accounts in Steam, Origine, Juppé, etc. will be inherited.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №106812
 15.12.2014
If your husband "is suspected of betrayal", congratulations - the problem is in you. You cannot / do not want / can not build a family life - do not complain.
Look for the problem in yourself, not as a cleaning.

If your wife teaches you horns, you are looking for a cause in yourself or...?

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna