bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №121905
 16.12.2015
A possible enrichment plan of thirty points. They all contain the same word “theft.”

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №121904
 16.12.2015
Meanwhile, Mega-Kadrovik did not speak out for the first time. There was once a story about how to keep people in touch. Typically, we have higher salaries than our competitors, people come to us, so we will have fun as much as we can. And then about the system of fines for every cheek, which is not officiated in advance, and about the fact that the first months each employee even owes the company remains, about the poisoning of any human behavior in employees and transforming them into robots, even to the toilet walking strictly on schedule.

Such a sadistic company wants to enjoy, even if you have never worked there, and leaving there does not " knock on the door" is simply unrealistic.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №121903
 16.12.2015
In the clinic is not allowed without bacillus, the price of which is 5 rubles. And I’ve been there every day for almost two months and, to be honest, the frog has a breath of giving a coin every day. Therefore, I economically remove the cushions at the exit, carefully hide in the bag until the next visit.
Today, after the next procedures, I go down from the fifth floor of the clinic on the spare staircase, absolutely deserted. On the way I pull my shoes off. In the face of the man - the morda-golda-print - the classic image of the recetor of the 90s. I am frightened: "Do not throw, let me take!" I am, after wearing, stretching out the unfresh blue pieces...

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №121902
 16.12.2015
In my opinion, upgrading Windows is like playing a casino – the main thing is to stop on time.

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №121901
 16.12.2015
At the video with the fight between Saakashvili and Avakov: Armenian with a Georgian in Russian, they find out who of them is the larger Ukrainian.

[ + 16 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №121900
 16.12.2015
Per the tigers are all such bats and don’t bite anyone at all? Smellful people are chasing us about the difficulty of working with predators

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №121899
 16.12.2015
XXX is no. I have all sbs. I don’t go to work, I don’t betray my wife (no wife – no betrayal), I don’t argue with my friends.
Yyy: No work – no walks.
Zzz: I have no friends, I don’t argue.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №121898
 16.12.2015
The lectures on art yesterday burned:
I do not like that Jesus is often depicted as so poor and unhappy on the cross. After all, he was a healthy young man with good genetics.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №121897
 16.12.2015
Today I met someone with the same character as I have... It’s hard to admit, but yes... I wanted to stifle this infection in 10 minutes.

[ + 16 - ] Comment quote №121896
 16.12.2015
One day I’ll go out of the house for a bread and sit in the electric car on the Maldives.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №121895
 16.12.2015
From the hub, an article on using home internet at work, bypassing content restrictions:

I will immediately state that the article is not intended for professionals, but rather for people in need of full access to the Internet.

XXX: I thought that the article for secretaries and accountants, who were closed social networks, and here

"We will assume that you have installed a clean, naked Debian in terminal or graphic mode, to your taste."

XXX is 5.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №121894
 16.12.2015
I am tired of already explaining to clients that my name is not Divanov, but Ivanov.
YYY: And you can imagine what our colleague and your friend Ermolin...

From the same opera:
Alexander Spirin has already reconciled, but Yevgeny Bukkin refuses to use the mail.

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №121893
 16.12.2015
After dismissal from the previous job, I was paid compensation for unpaid leave (White employment was 10 000p). Not wishing to tolerate such an obscurity, I began to write to the former boss on the soap demand for payment, for which I was sent in a polite form.



I didn’t get lost and wrote a letter to the labor commission of the Russian Federation, but in the letter I described everything: the black trade, the absence of fire extinguishers, the illegal hiring of workers, the making of marriages, etc. After a few weeks I forgot about the letter and quietly worked in a new place, as a former employee called me and told the story with a shaken voice, how to them in the office broke up with checks of everything and immediately. In his call, he told me that they wanted to cover the office, and the bosses were fined 200,000 and it was not the end.



I have never been paid a compensation, but it was somehow pleasant =)

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №121892
 16.12.2015
There is a legend that if 4 to 6 drivers of the Jigul gather together and empty their luggage compartments, they will easily collect another car.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №121891
 16.12.2015
XHH: Once we laughed at people who, when they first saw the browser, typed something in the search line like: "Show me a film with Schwarzenegger, please".
We laughed and called them lambers and teasers.
HH: And today it works.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №121890
 16.12.2015
I may add to this:
HR 19089: You're lucky to have dealt with the bugs in the IT field. I had to restore the object after one IT shaker, dismissed due to the kiddalov from z / p, so he managed to turn the network so that a bunch of mints, FSB-shchniks and other shushers, who came to the object, could not find and prove anything. The only thing that has been confirmed is that the fall of the network is a human factor. And they got everything there so well that they had to change all the equipment and raise the servers from scratch. The result: the large enterprise stood up for almost 3 months. Losses of hundreds of millions, if not more.

And also, boys, have you heard about the fact that if the husband beats the rose again, it is not the husband's fault, but the father? If every time a former employee punishes you, you are really kidding. And you don’t have to fantasize about the topic "but we’ve shown them all". A doubtful story.

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №121889
 16.12.2015
Opinions about the Forex Exchange:

Sergei Plotnikov 7 hours ago
He (author of the video) forgot to remember that all this is kiddalovo

Peter 7 minutes ago
Sergey agrees, I also tried to deal with programming, looked at a couple of types on YouTube, statistics of salaries of progressives and sent resumes to many companies, but they never contacted me. So what a kidding these progammists, and what a fool they will pay from $1,000

Andrei 3 minutes ago
Petr +1 and I tried to read a book in a clear way, in order to write games, and there is not written how to write games. Mouse here.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №121888
 16.12.2015
For fifteen years I and my co-workers said that the bosses are stupid fools, and I finally became the boss. And now I can’t forget how my former bosses controlled this herd of lambs and didn’t kill anyone.

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №121887
 16.12.2015
I came today for an interview with a company that sells alcohol. With a wild hammer, in a messy shirt and with a missing look. I go to the staff manager’s office, he looks at me for five seconds and says, “I’m looking, you’re preparing.” taken to work.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №121886
 16.12.2015
I decided to share my feelings. The Metro. Hour of Pick. Most of the stations. In the first approaching train "inside" is not possible. The people slowly, the train after the train, passes to the door. And here comes the long-awaited moment when you realize that you can get into the next train, because between you and the rails there is nothing but a couple of centimeters of air. There are two terrible minutes of waiting. Behind you is supported by a crowd of people who have enough light push in your back that you would fall on the rails. You want to go back, to free yourself at least a few more centimeters of saving space, but you can't, because the crowd behind you will not allow it to do. Here comes a train that barely touches your head with its mirror. You are put into the car, and there is a "relaxed" state. Another day, and no “good,” “adequate” citizen has hit you under the train. And so every day.

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