bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №83010
 16.06.2013
An unknown man took out a wallet with money from the Israeli ambassador in St. Petersburg, which contained 12,000 rubles.
Well, at least I managed to get back home :)

[ + 26 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №83009
 16.06.2013
No, I understand, everything in life happens, but what had to switch in a person's head to change the job from an admin to a funeral agent?

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №83008
 16.06.2013
The newcomer:

"Make an opportunity to comment on quotes, give life to scratches!"

One of the first changes was the cancellation of comments XD
First of all, the registration of new users has ended. :)

Reader since 2006. ^ ^_^

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №83007
 16.06.2013
Anonymity implies that they will write this test without outsiders, and the results will not be published. Anonymity does not mean that the test sheets will not indicate the FIO.
– – – – – – – –
EGE miscarriages do not distinguish between "anonymity" and "privacy". The sadness.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №83006
 16.06.2013
Yesterday I saw an advertisement where top pop singers and singers complain about the presence of a voice and the absence in their repertoire of new songs, offer the people to write for them a new hit, which they will choose. It seems to me that they’re all in...li?

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №83005
 16.06.2013
From the bike forum:
The people are illiterate and the salespeople are very upset.
The husband of a cousin's sister was coupled a bicycle with a gas amortiser (wild). Brother to me: Mishan go let me show you what my son bought for 25 thousand...
I ask him: what kind of gas foam can air??? (What do I think of ourselves?)
Well, there is an ordinary Stells with a start-up level hydra and a PCT fork with an elastomer (a circle curtain is also the easiest). I’m like a roasted roast: and where is the gas? He is like this: well, I don't know, they said the guy immediately under your weight fill the fork with gas (damper), only you then don't touch anything... muddy... The hardness twist was twisted and the pump depicted a wild pump.
So I'm not surprised that people are stupidly coupled with these wonderful units under the appearance of professional-level veils, and when we all look at them as idiots, they think that we are just crazy and jealous of their self-made.)))

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №83004
 16.06.2013
Russian people: coco, in Europe, big wages, honest officials and the laws are observed! And we bribes even take lighting, salaries 10 thousand and eternal 146% * pulls out of the wallet the last penny for the next utility payment, shocks a fist *
The government: breathes up, looks at the sides in confusion, mourns, grumbles, but suddenly clarifies in the face of the gay marriage in France! The Swedish families. The disgrace! Growing up our children! The Propaganda Law! The penalty! The penalty! The Traditions! Say NO to European infection! Fight the gay!
Russian people: * wide clamps eyes and obediently hates homosexuals *
Tagged: o_o
The government: Fuchs legalizes slavery, sells the last Ryazan mud to extraterrestrial invaders and plunges into corrupt Europe.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №83003
 16.06.2013
Do you want to play the piano tomorrow? :)
2: Do you feel the irony, the crawler asks a simple programmer to drag a piano? and :)
Do you raise 60 kg?
I get up from bed at 2:64 every morning.

[ + 31 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №83002
 16.06.2013
Here’s what I didn’t expect, including a porn video – so it’s to hear the "Palacho’s Bride" of the King and the Joke band in the background of what’s going on about___O

[ + 21 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №83001
 16.06.2013
Tyki Mikk: And when I studied in 1st grade I drank almost without drying... mostly vodka... like we drank about 1.5 liters of vodka per person... 3 hours I drank probably... then I first grabbed a protein... the next day I was dragged by the smell of vodka to embrace a white friend...
Tyki Mikk: After this incident there was another 3-4 drinks to protein...then I decided that vodka I still don’t like
Max Art for [Tyki Mikk]: what is Taras protein? How it affects you.
Tyki Mikk for [Max Art]: For the first time I had an obsessive idea that the computer was following me... according to the stories of the computers, I bite the wire from the key and threw it out into the window
Tyki Mikk for [Max Art]: I was still trying to escape from drunkenness, but the escape ended with the first door hole...why I tried to escape no one knows... say I stood up and ran
Tyki Mikk for [Max Art]: Well, and the last time after I was almost bound with vodka, I explained to the dwarf about an hour why he could have an advantage in racing...
Tyki Mikk for [Max Art]: Instead of a dwarf there was a dwarf statue that is put in the garden

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №83000
 16.06.2013
Oh yeah! The grandmother said looking at the strings in the market... something happened... and there is nowhere to go.
Here we had a coward, dishes and floors to wash and my grandfather was enough to wash the car... and now shame one

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №82999
 16.06.2013
Typical news on First: America in the ass, Europe in the fire, and we are in the best country in the world!

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №82998
 16.06.2013
@2crazy4you
Epic trolling of girls: buy a underwear, and then give it to your best friend with the words "I am small, and you will definitely fit!".

[ + 37 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №82997
 16.06.2013
Shop and Lunch. There is a young mother with a 4-year-old daughter. She lists the foods she needs:
“Give me two kilograms of sugar and three large mayonnaises.
My daughter with a complaint:
And the bread please.
My mother is surprised:
Why do you have bread, sweetheart?
Are we going to eat sweet mayonnaise?
The curtain.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №82996
 16.06.2013
Elena
I took Kiryush to work in the cafe two weeks ago, and he liked everyone so much that the mistress decided to buy another one, only a girl and a blue. I pulled an old cage out of the house. And here we went with the waitress Vika to the nearest zoo for a bird. Zoo near Lenin. We picked out the most beautiful, active and wonderful girl, put her in a box and we, in turn, kissing, brought her to the cafe. In short, when the puppy was transplanted from a box into a cage, it naturally flew out.
Elena
I flew into the kitchen.
He struck his head at the window glass.
He fell into the freezer.
Paul is
I thought I was just murdered and here...
fucking
Elena
This is a funny story ?
Paul is
Geth is
Elena
The quick cook dropped into the freezer with his hand.
Paul is
It is the same
Elena
I pulled the animal out!!! to
Paul is
Did the cook get out?
Elena
All are alive
My bird for two days.
She is holding ?
Elena
I’m glad that no one ordered the potatoes that day!! to

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №82995
 16.06.2013
It's and
I will show you where rar's zip's fun!

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №82994
 16.06.2013
This feeling
When after a long stay on the Internet, you open a book, read it and realize that there is no mistake!

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №82993
 16.06.2013
I bought a children's disc with cartoons. We read with my husband the description (orthography and punctuation are preserved): The good cat Leopold, constantly bothered by two mice, demanding reciprocity.

[ + 32 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №82992
 16.06.2013
The State Duma has passed a law banning gay propaganda. But there is one nuance: the word "homosexuality" has been replaced by the elegant term "non-traditional sexual relations". Let you know that oral sex is not a “traditional sexual attitude” like many other people’s bed hobbies. It is canonical and traditional to be in a missionary position on the bed, under the blanket, when the light is turned off (fubla!). Thus, the sellers and buyers of bananas, hot dogs, collars, belts, ropes, handcuffs, lubricants, sausages, cucumbers and other longed objects (in Kazan, for example, champagne) can be fined and chewed with phallic bushes. Because a woman who eats a banana in public promotes the most unconventional relationships, let alone a man. And now eat ice cream only at home behind closed doors, sitting in the closet.
However, for masturbation by crucifixion is now a penalty, so fuck with it, with ice cream.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №82991
 16.06.2013
If unexpectedly, just so, the father-in-law gave your family 10 thousand, be sure, you will work all 50.

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