bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 36 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №95428
 17.03.2014
From the website of the radio station "Voice of America" (the propaganda radio station of the USA):

The administration of Barack Obama promises to take immediate action and punish Moscow for the fact that the inhabitants of Crimea voted for joining Russia.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №95427
 17.03.2014
Cousin and three sons:
Time is flying! My eldest son is watching Star Wars, and he is better than I, who is there, who is there, who is young, and where is the star of death.

[ + 17 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №95426
 17.03.2014
Mr. PAnd on the territory of those countries that are dissatisfied with our policy in Crimea, we will hold a referendum on joining Russia!

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №95425
 17.03.2014
“In this century, the times have long passed when the international community could accept the fact that one country takes over the territory of another by force,” he said today. Press Secretary of the White House. Did he understand what he said?

[ + 30 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №95424
 17.03.2014
It is time to hold a referendum in the U.S., is it in vain that we sent immigrants there for 100 years?!?! to

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №95423
 17.03.2014
here here :

As a person familiar with the ases of marketing, I want to shake the hand of the one who first came up with advertising through a speaker on our city buses.
...And as a common man, forced to regularly use public transportation, I would give this genius a shield from the helicopter.

— — — —

From the subway the same story, to drive without headphones - just the nerves to tremble from these endless advertisements. That’s why I have to listen to music, which actually reduces my chances of meeting someone.
p.s So if you suddenly looked at a girl in the subway, but she is in the headphones, honestly, nothing terrible will be, if you carefully tap her shoulder and ask to get acquainted) and if you suddenly send a response, then believe it, you do not need it. All rays of good are shorter.

[ + 40 - ] [8 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №95422
 17.03.2014
I do not understand why yesterday’s fighters for freedom and fair elections deny the free will of the people of Crimea?

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №95421
 17.03.2014
Antony
Whoever sees the account first wins.
Anna is
For example? =) is
Antony
I would like to get a flash bottle.
And you? )
Anna is
I would like to rule the world.
Antony
God knows I need to win.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №95420
 17.03.2014
Race by
About "Y"
So I understood that if the letter "Y" is banned, then the great film of Gaida will either be banned or renamed into:
"Operation "It Can't Be Called" and the Other Adventures of Shurik"

Only not "naming", but "naming"

[ + 56 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №95419
 17.03.2014
I am a writer!! I moved and moved into a new house. These are access points:
FreeWIFI_Kvartira_116
Free WiFi Kv.99 [300kbps]
FreeWI FI KVARTIRA101 [Na Zdorov'e!]
Free Wi-Fi Speed – 1 Gbps! to
Wi-Fi Halava Kvartira 113
Wi_Fi besplatno podavites' 1gb/s
Just free spoot wifi [no password]
Wifi berite komu nado!!! by kv 105
It seemed to be a mistake, but don’t eat...I was ashamed of the shit!! to
Tomorrow I’ll go out and get rid of it too!!! Are we worse than others???? to

My wife really said I was fucking.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №95418
 17.03.2014
This is how it was necessary to care for people in their own country, so that they voluntarily wish for life changes and even with such unanimity.

[ + 18 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №95417
 17.03.2014
When I in the New Year under the battle of the curants guessed that the Crimea would become ours again, I did not think that I would be so literally understood.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №95416
 17.03.2014
We do not need a Schengen visa.

[ + 38 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №95415
 17.03.2014
Russian Minister of Culture Vladimir Medinsky gave an interview to the American newspaper "Russian Life". The Minister said:
“I believe that after all the disasters that struck Russia in the twentieth century, starting with the First World War and ending with the restructuring, the fact that Russia is still preserving and developing, says that our people have one extra chromosome.”

In any biology textbook, you can read that an excess chromosome (47 chromosomes instead of normal 46) is a sign of Down syndrome.

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №95414
 17.03.2014
Father and son in the kitchen. Both of the factory dynasty. The Father:
We played dominoes and cards and drank at work.
The Son: No We have this strictly! No cards, no alcoholic drinks!
Father: What’s the point? Do you no longer pay for the replacement?! to
Son: Yes, I agree, but why is that so, Dad?
There’s a pause and then the grandfather from the bedroom shouts, “Yes, granddaughter, what did you want?” As we built these furnaces after the war, so you float on them.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №95413
 17.03.2014
xxx: Do you want to go?
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYY Not long and not loud.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Mom gave Vova two packs in the morning: one with lunch, the other with garbage

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №95412
 17.03.2014
In order not to fall asleep for anything important, Hertzens usually called the Decembrists at six in the morning.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №95411
 17.03.2014
Alexander the Great: There are fucking smart people. Those who know hundreds of phone numbers, all known by their surname, know the shortest. Like Sherlock Holmes, you are popular. How to train memory? What advice would you give?

Change the nick: iodomanine huni by the vein

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №95410
 17.03.2014
I used to rejoice when I found an old box with children's toys in the country, and today I feel the same emotions when I find an old hard in the remote box of the table.

[ + 42 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №95409
 17.03.2014
Moreover, being a divorced mother or even a single mother is more honourable than being a “old virgin.”
This is the same thing....
I agree with you, is it just nonsense?
What does it mean to be "honorable"? What is the complex of inferiority, what is life for others to praise or at least not to blaspheme? Points are more meaningful?
Everyone has their own situation in life, and everyone builds (well - must build) their own life under their specific conditions.

For example, if I have a job near the house, or removed from the house on a compact basis, or I can't drive because of health features - I will not spend 20 kilobacks on a piece of unnecessary iron just because the car owner is "honourable", and on the tram to ride - "west".

If a woman knows that she has, for example, a bad harmful character, or no appearance at all, or she can not tolerate children, or does not tolerate the presence of strangers, or there is not a person around whom she would want to radically change herself, if she is absolutely not burdened by loneliness, and even delighted - why should she break herself for the approval of the grandmothers on the bench? Just get married, give birth and get divorced, so it’s honourable? Destroying the lives of at least two people?

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna