bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №107036
 19.12.2014
<xxx> In Crimea you need to produce a new variety of grapes.
<xxx>And call it "Sweet"!

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №107035
 19.12.2014
The journalist from Kirov was not drunk, he survived two strokes
Q: During the question

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №107034
 19.12.2014
M: And I am glad to inform you that it was a brilliant idea to put the w
because as a Druid 86 Levela what is happening stresses me much less than as a commercial director

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №107033
 19.12.2014
Perforator and Perforator.
Above us lived a man who had an interesting hobby, but also brought in income (trading on the market and in the commission). So was he, his mother, a waiting man!!! In the 1980s it was fashionable.
Have a metal picture at home. Oldfagus must remember) And since there was a main place of work for his favorite business, he devoted virtually all his free time (non-working, i.e. working time). For almost 17 years we have been involuntary participants in this fascinating process. So is!

by P.S And so the normal man was not drinking, then he would repair and paint the bench in the courtyard, then the sandbox, then something else useful... because, apparently, they did not scandalize...

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №107032
 19.12.2014
Before the New Year’s Carnival. A few years ago, a friend was going to marry a girl. She is beautiful, spectacular, but she is horrible. A friend did not react to the hints, and nobody decided to tell him directly. And here we gathered in the countryside house with the intention to arrange a costume party for Halloween. We sit down and discuss who will be who. A friend proudly declares that his bride will be a vampire. To what one of the companies, already well underwritten, says thoughtfully:
Yes, she sweats a lot...
My friend, by the way, did not marry.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №107031
 19.12.2014
The Hollywood is a dispute between two fools trying to prove to each other that shoes of their own size are better for each other.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №107030
 19.12.2014
xxx: This progi you have advised has a side effect – I really want to fuck you with a stick...

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №107029
 19.12.2014
When a person commits suicide, he commits suicide because he kills himself who wants to kill himself. When a man goes back into the past and kills himself, it is murder because he kills himself, not wanting to kill himself. And if a person is going to commit suicide, and then he comes, but from the future, and helps himself, then it is just time to breathe out.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №107028
 19.12.2014
I saw in the pharmacy "Vitamines for men leading an active lifestyle", on the box is drawn a puppy with hats in the hand.
I read the contraindications:
Individual intolerance
pregnancy
Breast Feeding


[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №107027
 19.12.2014
xxx: times have changed for everyone very unnoticed, I even caught myself on this thought a few days ago — stands at the box office in the supermarket in front of me an eye-catching thin no type of fuck and not get up, like the fear as here I pay attention to her purchases and to the fact that she has in her wallet "full naked rabbit" and buying her cupcake type dinner... well, all the desire to get acquainted is covered with a copper pelvis... I don’t need such a gemmor... no, I all perfectly understand the type that she is a student and all that, but all of us
@ArkanoiD : LOL She has no money, but you are poor.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №107026
 19.12.2014
Eugen: You as an analyst can explain to me why the ruble has collapsed so much?? to

Proff: As an analyst, I can only assume that a man known in narrow circles sold dollars bought in 2009.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №107025
 19.12.2014
to this:

A genius business idea! Buses for the rich. The cost of the trip is 1000 rubles.
You can ride in a luxurious shirt in a comfortable chair, with a new cockpit - and the conductor serves cocktails - and, most importantly, no jealous miserable bull!
____________

You guys are late. Taxi was invented long ago.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №107024
 19.12.2014
I moved to Moscow 3 years ago.
In the middle of the working day on the street saw a woman of 50 with the bank of Yarpiva.
Three years ago, I would have thought of “Nihua, a woman on the street with a beer.”
Now I thought "nihuyase, Yarbive still exists".

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №107023
 19.12.2014
Const: Democracy is the best social system
On the imperative condition that the number of voters does not exceed 4 thousand people (according to Aristotle), and that each of them has at least 5 slaves (according to Solon).

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №107022
 19.12.2014
Vladimir Vladimirovich, and what happened...
Oh all that!

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №107021
 19.12.2014
My last word in court will sound like this:

Mr. Judge, I am deeply sorry for my actions. The decision to kill this designer came into my mind as soon as I saw the links "galerie" and "benefits" in the layout. Later, in the process of drawing, I found that the layout used gray text of nineteen shades, layers grouped as a hit, all buttons of varying width, and of five(!) The three fonts are non-standard, paid, and in browsers are often displayed with smoothing defects. After all these discoveries, I sincerely regretted that I had not killed him slowly enough.

I think I will be justified.

[ + 27 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №107020
 19.12.2014
Yesterday I was on the drinking of the women's football team "CHCCH".
Oh you are! And how?? to
Do you know what’s the most unusual that can happen in such a wonderful conjunction of circumstances?? to
Do not pull!
What happens when you end up in bed with the only lesbian in this team?
- 0_o

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №107019
 19.12.2014
Let me introduce you to C-Palladium. On the evening of December 16 decided to buy OMS in the form of palladium for 170 thousand. This morning, the same palladium was worth 114 thousand. I cut my last hair and got in panic. And not just in the head. A financial genius.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №107018
 19.12.2014
In which street do you live?
In the “Career”.
What about the word “career”? Private houses, millionaries, expensive boutiques?
- From the word "carrier" - barracks, gopniks, larks...

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №107017
 19.12.2014
We have the same story in the sale of auto parts. Sometimes you want to leave the car mechanic right behind the shelf, who does not know that the shells in the planetary transmission are not external and internal, but solar and coronal, but you have to force yourself.
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
I work as a doctor. How bad people who can't tell which part of the intestines they are hurt, and throw their fingers into the stomach.
____
Learn to read. We are not talking about end users (patient, car owner), but about those who, by profession, need to understand terminology. Well, it’s like your nurse would call arterial and venous blood ‘bright red’ and ‘dark red’.

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