bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 87 - ] Comment quote №44703
 19.03.2011
Answer from Miley:
My cat is fucking a toy bear. Where to buy a poor bear with the symbol of United Russia?

[ + 88 - ] Comment quote №44702
 19.03.2011
Let a miracle happen and the cat will recover!

[ + 69 - ] Comment quote №44701
 19.03.2011
from contact.
Now you can tell your friends that you are in our group. To do this, you need to press "Tell friends" just below the avatar. It is not difficult, we are pleased. thank you! Everything is done for you.

XX: It is not difficult for me, I am ashamed.

[ + 74 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №44700
 19.03.2011
The grandmother looks at her long and closely and begins to say: "The cat is dirty behind the ears, behind the ears you need to wash." O_O

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №44699
 19.03.2011
I went to the kindergarten with her for two years, studied in the first class for six months.

And then one day she said to me, “You and I are different people.”

I am worse than I am dead.
Archaeology, 2 cl

[ + 64 - ] Comment quote №44698
 19.03.2011
And I was then nineteen years old, and I got into the hospital with a severe form of pneumonia... And I lay there for thirty-four days, although standard twenty-one lie... And then on the day and so thirty-two, when I was already going to repair, the temperature suddenly rose to under forty... And the night I didn’t sleep this, and the sisters ran over me, bothered me... And in the morning, everything passed... and in the same morning on the walk I saw the chief doctor of that hospital for the first time... And this doctor asked me how I felt, and what I did yesterday... He replied, I was tired of lying there, I was bored here, I was going to do a lot of things, I didn’t go back, and the doctor said that my night condition can only be explained by

[ + 77 - ] Comment quote №44697
 19.03.2011
Chat with the manager (M) Bank "ZZZ" about missing money somewhere.
M: Hello to you. You have contacted the support service of the Bank "ZZZ". What can I help you?
I: Hello to you. Today, together with the withdrawal of the imposed amount, which was transferred to the payment of the goods, the extra 600 rubles were withdrawn, for which reason I do not know. Could you help me figure it out?
M: A minute... Yes, 643.70 rubles were withdrawn from your account in addition to the indicated amount. This is due to the fact that in Ukraine payments are in the form of rubles-dollars-rubles, and because of the difference in the purchase and sale rates you lost 643.70 rubles.
I: So that’s what you’ve done to me right now?
M is yes.
I: Thank you for your sincerity. and :)
M: Thank you for contacting our support service. Do not be embarrassed to contact us later.

0 - O

[ + 226 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №44696
 19.03.2011
All those who joke about Japan are just idiots! Despite the tragedy, they were able to unite. The prices in the shops are not too high. What would happen in Russia? Many would like to live on another mountain. Think about...
Sorry that’s not funny.

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №44695
 19.03.2011
The employee read in Komsomolskaya Pravda, I quote from the newspaper word to word:
“In Aysk, the death of a famous local businessman, who is believed to have committed suicide, has been registered. The entrepreneur shot himself three times in the head.

PSC... Added that he later threw himself out of the window...

[ + 78 - ] Comment quote №44694
 19.03.2011
News on Rambler:

High school students in Washington were poisoned with cocaine.
Four students...

Commentary :

Stan, Kyle, Kenny and Eric? You guys? you guys?? to

[ + 82 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №44693
 19.03.2011
In the home:
Open the militia.
Don’t be fooled, we don’t have such a unit.
30 seconds broke, but said: - open the police

[ + 147 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №44692
 19.03.2011
I remember when I was a kid, there were times.
Constantly hanging out on the street in the winter, fucking drive out, ride from the mountains on sandwiches, there was a lot of people, fun.
I remember how the boys pulled a hose of water from the house to pour the slide carefully in front of the entrance, then played hockey, riding, tried to make PA on skis...
In the summer, they climbed the buildings, fought the house, played the Cossacks-robbers, the girls jumped through the jumpers, the rubber.
The boys fought in the district - in the district, established territories :-)
I played badminton, my grandfather played table tennis.
They smoked cigarettes behind the house and tried to smoke them ridiculously, laughed at the passers, throwing water bombs into them.
The girls flogged the shovels and bands, laughed at us wet after the water shooting.
The boys played soccer, in a siffo, dressed up, played fantasy, walked in the basements, in kindergartens, made tubes and plunged them with paper rackets.

And now what?? Solitary walking pensioners with their barely pumping and barely writing white boots, some garages, cars, melting snow, gray sky, outgoing guests from basements, dead from the morning drunk boots, broken children's playgrounds with alkas.

You will go out and die... no soul... Where are all the children? Where is the people? Where is the cry, the fun, the positive, the life?
Everything, fucking, on the internet, in counter strikes, in social media, in TVs, in debilo-multiks, in mobile phones.

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №44691
 19.03.2011
What do I not like about my wife?
Xhh: And you’ve ever had this situation: on the first floor there’s a weak smell of hot water, and you already think it’s yours, on the sixth, again prepared dinner?

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №44690
 19.03.2011
In old age, one validol remains from heart friends.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №44689
 19.03.2011
I told a friend who works at the polling station.
They hung a list of candidates, with the tags "Member of the party of the KPRF", "Member of the party of the ER" etc. The commission came, told to rewrite the word "member" from a small letter.
Picture of oil:
A man sits, rearranges lists, gives a phone call...

and yes?
–...
Remove the comments.
–...
I am changing a big member for a small one.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №44688
 19.03.2011
A regular client of a public house, opening his door at two o’clock at night, heard:
Where are you going, cattle?! to

[ + 66 - ] Comment quote №44687
 19.03.2011
Friends, I’m sorry for the off-top, but I don’t have the strength anymore!
To the girl who wrote: "Comrades culinary and sexual slave owners! Leave your contacts."
How much I’ve been waiting for you!) Aska: 4nol3-two55-4nol5.
Forget it, spring is spring! Thank you and good luck to you all!)

[ + 71 - ] Comment quote №44686
 19.03.2011
PhimGor (15:55:57 18/03/2011)
In the office there was,
Gender comes out of the toilet roast, grit "who in the toilet in the bowl his socks thrown" the girls are silent, men turn off, I am silent typically me "Stas and maybe yours...I" not my -they are small I measured))))"...work got up finally)))

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №44685
 19.03.2011
I will take, I will go, sex, sexual, culinary, food, slavery, guarantee, three times, for, in.

This year’s "Spring" be surprised.

[ + 69 - ] Comment quote №44684
 19.03.2011
I want a family. Tired of everything. I want to marry
Come on, take the tanna.
me: and who will I not tell - all, shit, rjut, type "ahahaahaah, you and get married? That fucking? You are still a child"
Bro: and Hule
Me: I am about it.
Should children not get married? You already have 24.
me: and they start with me "so this is a responsible business, there must be care"
Brother of Ahahah. Take care of the hamster. My wife will find food for her.
me: fucking, my tamogoi lasted for 3 months - I am the embodiment of care!

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna