bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №110902
 19.03.2015
I go electric today.
I hear two cute grandmothers talk about grandchildren.
Wade came to me yesterday.
Yes, and what did he do?
2 hours in the bathroom, 3 hours in the bathroom.
Men are such, they are not in a hurry.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №110901
 19.03.2015
here here :
__________
Thirty years ago I read a book, where everything is like in Avatar, only without war and on Jupiter, banal quiet research, a disabled person, living on an artificial satellite, regularly settles in an artificial cocaryamba, which floats around the planet, performs some work.
Eventually, the disabled person gets tired of returning to the degenerated body and he deserts, remaining in the quite comfortable body of the Jupiter monster.
__________

by Paul Anderson. "Call me Joe" I highly recommend "Patrol of Time" to read.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №110900
 19.03.2015
Memento_mori: I once went to wash a cup at work here to drink coffee. Circle in the shape of a skull. I wanted to sleep a lot that day and I was advised to pour soluble coffee in Schweppes instead of water - it boosts better, like. I come back to myself - I have a body in a rift in the doorway. I was surprised, confronted with myself, asking what I really wanted? He begins to tell me that he works with us, that he is our cleric, that we can turn to him if anything, etc. He speaks, and himself looks at the sides and listens. And I have an atmosphere for such conversations that is not entirely available - in columns black some, on the walls corresponding pictures, half-dark. While he was talking and looking at the walls, I was preparing coffee. She got a cup, put a cup of coffee there, took Schweppes and poured it into a cup. In the bowl, it immediately broke, burst, and a brown-colored foam suddenly rolled through the edge, pouring everything out there for me. He was frightened at the matter, and I took it and knocked on the blue eye: "Do you want vodka?" He said: "No!I went out and I didn’t see him again. Most importantly, I didn’t even plan anything like that :-)

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №110899
 19.03.2015
Are you as angry as dogs?
In the spring, warm and sunny.
You are making shit here.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №110898
 19.03.2015
New evidence of nuclear explosions on Mars!!!! to
XH: Will new sanctions be imposed on Russia for this?

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №110897
 19.03.2015
The media should pay tribute. We didn’t even notice when the struggle for peace grew into a war for peace.

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №110896
 19.03.2015
I pulled out my hand and was taken to the traumatologist. He looked at me and said, “Well, you need to correct, there is no anesthetic, here you have a ball, breathe in the air, here are the poems – read.” I sit, breathing with helium, reading Pushkin's poems with a furious whispering voice, rushing, forgot about my hand. The doctor shakes sharply, I feel pain and I begin to scream with my own whispering voice, I hear myself and I begin to rust, forgetting the pain. Russian medicine is the best in the world.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №110895
 19.03.2015
According to the Constitution, deputies do not bear any legal responsibility for their public statements. Only two other categories of citizens have such a privilege: the minority and the children.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №110894
 19.03.2015
After years of ignoring the means to increase the penis, spammers gave up and started sending me catalogs of women’s clothes.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №110893
 19.03.2015
If a person works with their brains or hands, it doesn’t matter what they wear.
And if the face of the face or the ass, then there is no dress code.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №110892
 19.03.2015
XX: Have you moved to the country of elves?
YYY: You know, after reading the comments on this post, I tend to assume that I just left the country of the Goblins.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №110891
 19.03.2015
My older brother and I had a pretty big difference in age, when I was small - they hardly communicated, he was uninterested. It happened in my fifth or sixth grade. When I started coming out of school in blue, my brother (he was graduating from the institute at the time) came to school at the end of the lessons, caught my offender and popularly explained to him that decent people never beat women, providing the lecture with a light pencil for profitability. At home, I was answered by a backbone for being silent for a long time and not complaining before. In general, I love my brother, but I have never learned to understand since then.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №110890
 19.03.2015
The Pontiac:
In high-end educational institutions, where care is given about the quality of the specialists, a large competition for the place of the teacher is sufficient. The administration has a choice, and therefore it is usually taught not only by professionals, but also by a strange conjunction of circumstances, intelligent, adequate people. It is unlikely that such a person will come to mind dressing up for work in God knows what, so that people then laugh and look behind their backs.
But in educational institutions, the class will be easier to tolerate a strangely dressed inadequate if he is a good professional.
_____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

But in the hottest educational institutions, where they teach not just recruited professionals by the administration, but major scientists who have personally discovered what they are telling, the type of "crazy scientist" is very common. Thus, in general, it does not matter who is dressed and dressed in any way, and they will teach so that very quickly and you will stop noticing such little things.

Of course, "Faculties of Innovative Management" even in these educational institutions this does not apply.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №110889
 19.03.2015
>> In other words, it is real how much it is food. In each city catch dogs, and distribute them to hospitals and schools. The result is budget savings, no need to spend money on keeping a dog, filled children.

>> And filled children to feed cats.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №110888
 19.03.2015
Yes, I also heard somewhere in the subway, a grandmother coming from Singapore, enthusiastically telling how clean there, and how we need to punish the pig people. Then I went on another bike walk. So, across the entire shore from the HSS past the Kremlin and beyond, further (kilometers 5) NONE URNA.
-
Hello from Tokyo. tk. There is no total recycling of waste such a concept as a street urn at all. Maximum on the street there are containers for plastic bottles and cans.
If you want to get rid of your rubbish:
Monday is burning rubbish.
Tuesday – Plastic
Wednesday is unprecedented
Thursday: Paper and Glass
Friday - old clothes and electronics items

Is it worth saying that with such a wild system no one but tourists and in the head will come to throw something on the ground? You only need to bring your fucking garbage to the house, and to us who live here - to bring it, hide it in a bag with a special brand and wait a week before you can take it out. By the way, the fence of garbage from the house until 8 in the morning, slept - wait a week.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №110887
 19.03.2015
More about the skull.

There in some ordinary high school at different times over the last 30 years, 7 or 8 modern popular fiction writers studied. This is a fact that is difficult to explain rationally.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №110886
 19.03.2015
Thanks to you! My friends now call me Iskander!
My daughter is 24 years old :(

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №110885
 19.03.2015
Igor: I would have watched the adaptation of BB: In all sinful - a rural teacher chases a selfie under the nose of a local owner.
Yaroslav Tugolukovskiy: Maybe then a local priest? Your name will fit well. Caleb is like that.
Igor: No-no, the teacher does this to pay his son for studying in the spiritual seminary.
Victor Antonovich: The Blue Sam has appeared again in the village! It is said that it is made by a certain rider with a pursuit "Lomonosov".

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