The subscription agency. The employee receives from the client by mail a request for the journal "Organ". He is not in the price, calls to the editorial office:
Is it an organ?
He gets a very unexpected answer:
Not an organ, but an organ.
We are not the first...

I was given a new guarantee for the new year. We bought a graphic tablet as a gift to the child, but a crazy computer store did not check the product, not without reason believing that interested and competent buyers would do it better. But I, as an absolute technical nonsense, did not want to ruin the holiday with a badly-functioning surprise, and the sellers advised to go into their warranty in the same building.
I go in, clarify - let them check, I take the turn. In front of me are two guys with a system block. Two masters are released at the same time, and we approach the shelf together. My master is buried somewhere, and I wait, watching for the neighbors. The standard dialogue:
What do you have?
I bought it a week ago and it doesn’t work.
The Master opens the block – and all the content of the body falls on it... I think my face should have been seen then... But Master! He only smiled a little pleasantly and clarified: "We collected ourselves?". He listened to their whisper: “Yes... themselves... cheaper... and began to tell them about whispers, which and how much are needed in this case, and then calmly began to check what could still be saved from their set.
No, well, if I could not see with my own eyes such sleepiness and unreasonable belief in his own strength, maybe I would also seem that the specialists exaggerate, describing the user vulgaris, how he, connecting the periphery, pushes the connections into the wrong connectors, or, connecting the headphones, calls and is upset that the columns do not work, and so on. But I believe.

Google fell for a few minutes.
XXX: It’s even scary to think about this... Who else will answer my questions...
YYY: You’ll think you lived without any internet there before. You go to the library.
Zzzz is heretic! There was no life before the Internet.

I saw the "Sleep" button on the site instead of "Send".
Time to...

Famous chef and TV host Jamie Oliver showed how chemicals turn dog-only food into human-friendly, and won a lawsuit against one of the world’s largest fast food chains, McDonalds.

The McDonald’s chain has always argued that their products are so cheap because they buy meat in giant wholesale lots. In fact, in the manufacture of filling for hamburgers they use unfoodable meat production waste, pre-washed in ammonium hydroxide to disinfect and give a "eatable" pink color.
In general, a product is taken that is only suitable for dogs, but after such treatment it is given to people.

...

zzz: These are the wrong worms you are crawling.
The real worm must be such that he sits on a leash without any hook, rushes rapidly to the naively floating carousel, suffocates, rises, passes the prey on to the master and, after a comradeship, crumbling the worm's jaw, goes back to underwater hunting!
_______________________________________________________

And the fishermen,
Are these judges?
Once you pulled it out,
The tail, in half hand!
And the judges,
There were worms before.
A worm once was,
Eat the river!
The Worms were swirling,
Fishermen have lied.
We listened to them,
They climbed on the hooks!
by Andrei Usakov.

Pascendi: Today at the Echo Vladimir Vishnevsky complained that modern youth does not understand the line: "I called you all twins in your youth."
And for sure: the girl-leader of the program "Diffiramb" didn't know what "double" is ("It's like a coin like that").

I feel old like a fucking mammoth :-)

(Interesting, do people born in 1990 understand the line from the song "... that you can’t wait for three people at the machine"?)

Ingaret: I heard this version - "and you can't wait for three people at the ATM".

I change a week in the Russian resort city N for a week in a new building in Moscow, because the pipet.
Howofony of cockroaches on the shore (Leps, Waenga, Factory and other bouye), screams from the amusement park, drunk companies are not in the order and not in the fall singing oh frost frost what a man black crown, lost souls knocking and ringing in all the gates - and we stopped here, and you don't know where we stopped, the ringing of dishes in the buffet from the sinking columns without an extinguisher, the screams of spears and feathers, the hysterical haunted dogs, the wicked cat break-ups and the subsequent wickedness of catching a half-waste container with chicken bones of eggs... And this, note, the quiet edges.
Perforators, screwdrivers, Bulgarians on the weekend - a child's cradle, believe it!

Discuss the fall of Google for 2 minutes:

xxx: The zero is not as shocking as the fact that once you go to Google in search of another question in life, you will see this: The website is inaccessible. It’s even scary to think about this...Who else will answer my questions...
YYY: You’ll think you lived without any internet there before. You go to the library.
Zzz: So to find the address of the library... you have to search in Google!

Why invent a mixture of a bulldog with a rhino - a pair of "preamble-fabula", when there is a pair of "prehistory-history"? Just without fucking.
___________________________________________________________________________
The man explained that the "preamble/ambula" is a quote from Strugacki. For fun, to raise the mood. The site is humorous.
And put here quotes from Wiki: just like hearing, for example, "Siju, I don't touch anyone, for compulsion I have not even had time to start to find out,what else for compulsion, why he needed it, why to fix it, and then bring a quote from Wiki, that compulsions are not used for a long time, and to conclude that compulsions now no one needs, the microwave is much better.
You won’t do that, right?
Or... stand up?

Today, she brought us her old straw. On the question ' why is it us'? She replied: Take it. It’s good, but it doesn’t work.)

Decided to re-read the words of the classic, wanted to introduce in Yandex "Beautiful time, eye charm...", sealed, introduced "Beautiful porka". Yandex offered the fair sex in Moscow.

And all why? We need to know the classics! "It is time!" (C)