Husband and wife on social media.

If I had no children, my house would be clean and my wallet would be full. But my heart would be empty.
If I had no children, my house would be clean and my wallet would be full.
You forgot to copy the last sentence.
M: No, I have not forgotten.

(postmodernist dialogue about birth, about hamster and about elections)

Brad, throw it in, it just can’t be.

I’ve seen so much in my life that I can even believe it.

WOUL: Because you are writing fiction and you think: "To add a flying toilet to the text? Oh well shit. What’s the point?" You get up from behind the compass, you approach the window... And behind the glass the "Fayans throne" flies.

X: I believe you will be able to blow up the untouchable!
Y: As you know, in order to infuse the uninflatable, you must first inflate the inflatable... And we don’t have money.

XXX: Call then and then immediately
Then, later or immediately?
When it comes later, call immediately.
YYYYYYYYYYY

As previously said about the knowledge of foreign language - "I translate with a dictionary", so now many people can confidently say: "I know, but with Google".

You don’t wear the same costume every day at work.

When I went to school, I was wearing the same dress for a year. Washing on the weekend. Even on the tree he wore it - simply decorated the podol with a myshura and supplemented it with buses. Not before the choice of dresses was, and in jeans can not the teacher.

The Eternal Theme. Now around the center are the types offering to buy old coins, like there is no money and are ready to give for cheap. I have faced twice.
Un-moment: Unfortunately, my elderly relatives on these coins "rarity" got caught. I then grabbed my head – why couldn’t I call and ask? These allegedly ancient coins are actually a new piece of brass made in China. Their real price is from the strength of 10 rubles, and confident people put out tens of thousands.
One-moment: A month ago, a quintet came to me, took the alleged Nikolaevsky ruble from my pocket and asked if I didn’t know how much I could get in an antique for such a coin. I replied that it can be obtained for it only in the rilo and not necessarily from the antique. Kent disappeared at a praiseful speed.

Yesterday I went to the euro network, wasted time and looked at my mobile phones. I am standing at the window, a sales consultant suits:

Are you looking for something specific?

No, yes, I look at it.

- Okay, let me then just stand next to you so I don't get fired, or there's a surveillance camera.

They stood, ran, the seller told about discounts. Hopefully not fired.

Xxx: take a picture of me in the studio? under the tree. How I Shake the Gifts
Do you mean jumping naked? Go to.

Don’t think of me as a paranoid, but I think someone is constantly reading what I’m writing here.

© by

I walk down the street, in front of the grandmother (B) and the little grandson (B). I hear this dialogue:
Q: You didn’t buy me a maffia, and I won’t eat lunch!
B: Do not eat lunch. I have candy in the refrigerator, and I can only eat it after lunch. We eat it ourselves.
A: I’m not going to walk!
B: This is my granddaughter! I have sick legs, I’d rather lie on the couch. You will play in the room.
A: And then... I will not go to the garden!
B: Do not go. Misha and Vadik will go to the garden, they will study there, and you will be stupid, they will not play with you.
A: And I am angry! (I think) And I-a-a... (plaxively) Naafoui poflaaaa!
B: (in shock) Oh you are a small parasite, you will send me again!
A: (with tears, ill-loving) Pofflaaa Naafu!

Do you know what is insulting the feelings of believers?
This is when you go to bed on Saturday, sincerely believing that you can sleep until noon, and at half nine in the morning you are awakened by the bells of the local temple.

In order to get a place at the pit, you have to be a decent pig.

Woman: the washing machine is broken, does not wash, look.
I: and weak youth to remember, to wash the pencil?
It is easy, just remember your youth.
I am :?? to
Sex three times a night.

I went to repair...

As the Prosecutor General of the USSR said: “The main thing is not to come out on your own during the investigative actions...”

What is happening? Judging by the incoming letters, there are only my relatives who die in aircraft accidents. Prohibit flights in the republic until everyone is dead there!

Tagged #

You are the girl of my dreams: beautiful, fun.
Do you want to sleep with me?
And smart too!

The company has already received 112 members. Is this a census of trolls or paranoids? I don’t know if I can push or not push.

If I were a cat, I would have buried you.

The case was on the first course, about a month after the arrival in communal. I was the only one on the stream after college and was of the same age with high school students, so my classmates often resorted to my help in resolving conflicts with “seniors.” I remember there were four people in the room.



The Dinner. When I came back from training, I found a girl in my bed. At first I was delighted, but then I thought it was probably caught by some of the guys. After the examination, it turned out to be a Lenocha from my group. She lived in our shelter, but in the neighboring wing. When it was time to go to bed, I woke her up and said it was my turn to sleep. She replied "OK" and lay down on the neighbor's bed (he wasn't there that day). In the morning, as nothing happened, Lennochka gathered and went with us for a couple.



So passed a month. We cleaned up, cooked up. In intimate proximity with none of the guys in our room was not noticed. Slept either on a free bed when someone did not sleep, or at the table at the compass.



In the end, I couldn’t stand it and asked at the room council, “Girls, so who is meeting Lennochka? Can you already ask the administration to allocate you two-bedroom apartments and move there? »

“We thought she lived with you, but she slept on your bed the first day.”



So, a month later, we realized that Lenochka does not meet with any of us and lives stupidly in our room.



After examining the flights with Lenocka, it turned out that she just quarreled with the girls around the room and began to survive. She decided to ask me for help but was embarrassed and decided to stay with us.



The story ended well for everyone. After talking to the stone, Lenoko was determined to another room and her neighbors calmed down. We haven’t cooked or cleaned for a month. Well, Lenocha got an important life lesson :D



P.S As I said in the previous post, "Smart guys learn in physmatism, but sometimes they don't get stupid."