Suddenly came to visit relatives with two of my cousins - a 4-year-old girl and a 2-year-old boy. And children are very active, if they do not do something interesting in time, then it is very difficult to calm them down. The goal is to prevent the destruction of the apartment. Brother in hand - a toy truck, sister - pencil and paper. He sits and paints. I jump around, amusing, thinking about what to quickly wrap up a joke hood with bubbles. And she raised her eyes on me, red, and embarrassed so - "Ksyush... You bother me". O_O So delicate I haven’t been sent to the fuck yet...

by DM

I woke up by the phone call of the boss(s)
I say hello.
N: Where are you?
I: Well, I was... urgently here...
N: Go up faster!! to
I guess, do not distract.

I stand in the line, my wife calls and asks:
Have you already arrived?
Yes, just just now.
Is the line big?
Man 5 to 7.
What account are you?
The sixth and eighth...

Panda (16:53:57 19/07/2010)
I don’t like the sand in the swimming pool.

Panda (16:53:59 19/07/2010)
! to! to

Animaljazz (16:54:13 19/07/2010)
Don’t go on the shore 😉

by Habr
Considering the specificity of the matrix world, and where it came from
Electric car is more likely to drive on Trinity than Trinity on electric car.

XHHH: I’m getting enough electricity for a dumb reading of a programming textbook

What will you program?

Judging by half of what I’ve read, I’ll call out ghosts, guess on the inside of a black dog and drink beer with tanks.

Vitamin D: I wanted to make my husband happy. I went to the store, bought him beer (will come from work tired, on the street hot, and here in the refrigerator beer cold stands).
has arrived. I saw the beer and so with suspicion on me: “You’ve either already done something, or you’re just about to go.”and (

She: Come to me, the comp is broken.
He: This time what?
She: I haven’t invented it yet :-) Well come here ;-)

Lukashenko is stupid. He turned to Moscow in the back, while she turned to him in the front.

Excerpts from Female Logic:
Are you in the store?
He is: Yes.
She says, buy me something.
He is: What?
She: I do not know.
He says, “Say what to buy and I’ll buy; if you say nothing, I’ll buy nothing.”
She: I don’t know what I want. If you don’t buy anything, you don’t love me!! to

How about "graph"
High Lord Kelian: My first wife called me so.
I think it’s good 😉))))))))))))))))))
High Lord Kelian: what?)))
Bob: Kun: Did you have a woman first?
The High Lord Kelian
High Lord Kelian: You are in the heat!
High Lord Kelian: No Cannes
High Lord Kelian: the first was Linux

XXX is
I want to go to Antarctica with the penguins.

YYYY
It’s crazy that she came out.

XXX is
Why is?

XXX is
I am more frightened that instead of "to penguins" I almost wrote "to peelmen"...

We go with the crowd at sea.
YYY: It’s all clear :) You’ll even look at the sea before you leave, or you’ll swim all week long...
YYY: or acquaintances drove a crowd 5 years ago to Yaremch, skiing... days after 10 drove out of the house, because of this. The cognac is over :) decided to take a picture on the slope, and the snow has already been able to hide... in general, they broke the pillow to depict the snow on the bushes and in turn took a photo.)

If you have a job, it does not mean that you will have a salary.

In the store of building materials worked as a loader a low, thin man.
When I met myself, I was introduced to myself as Nikolai Ivanovich Mazai. Later it turned out that he had a completely different surname, and Mazai he was nicknamed in the hospital for the constant desire to "smash" and he was very proud of it.
Looking at Mazai, I was amazed at the capabilities of the human body. Every day after work, he was drunk with friends so that he went home, fell asleep, continued to move "on the autopilot" and came home without any help. In the morning, without the visible consequences of drunkenness, he resorted to the warehouse in time, and, without waiting for orders, found his own job by sorting and storing the saw material.
One day, at the end of November, after eating, as usual after work, I did not get home with a friendly drink. Falling into a deep pit, he could not get up. It was dark early. No one saw him until the morning. At night it hit the frost, and when it was found in the morning, Mazai was lying, shrouded with ice.
The police arrived with a truck. They opened the boat and, breaking the ice around the corpse, swept the deceased into the body. After hitting, the body revived, and began to despair. From horror, the whole crowd was fossilized. Mazai, realizing that the militia was here in his honor, swung through the board from the side of the cabin and fled home.
When they opened the store, the shaved and sober Mazai, not sneezing or coughing, had already brought order on the territory.

Bear service is when roads, education and medical services are required, while nanotechnology, EGE and national projects are offered.

You are Artem...you know?
WOW : No. But I know Artem...Ova and Artem...other. And these two Artems were enough for me to realize that I do not want to meet Artems anymore.

Handur
My grandfather put a bite of worms in my pocket, gave me his old bite and said, "Hey, here is that pierce, plant a worm on a hook and catch a fish."

Handur
The most difficult thing was to plant a living, moving worm on the tail of a rugged hook. Some white fluid flowed out of him, he ate and broke out. I was crying, I was sorry for him.

The xxx:
You have to go to the tooth... A point is played by a shopper...
YYYY :
Something I do not get connected.

I tried to masturbate on the same pornographic video for two months in a row and realized that constant relationships are doomed, as they can’t help but get bored.