When I was four or five years old, I couldn’t tie the ropes. My mom and dad didn’t care much about this, so I always sat down humbly and waited for somebody to do it for me.

One day my parents’ schedules coincided, and to take me to kindergarten, Dad sent a soldier from the military unit he served in.

The soldier entered our apartment as if he were home, ordered me to dress up and quietly watched me.

And when the turn came to tie the ropes, I, as usual, splashed on the floor and questioningly looked at the soldier. He was mildly surprised and asked only one question: “Don’t you know how to tie the ropes?” “No,” I replied, and then the magic began... This guy taught me two ways to tie the ropes in five minutes.

In the evening, when my mom came to take me out of the garden, I attached the ropes to my boots. She was very surprised and asked where I had time to learn. To which I gladly replied, “Papa the soldier taught me!”

Man, if you suddenly read this post, I remember everything! Per this is the only clear memory of this age😀

A cultural question contains half the answer. For example, “You are a fool, are you?“”

In the autumn of 1999, I was invited to work as a coach for the national team of Kuwait. The offer was tempting, especially since earning chess in Armenia at the time was not easy. And I agreed. I formed the documents, and on December 27, under the very millennium, I was in Kuwait.
At the airport, I was met by an elderly gray-haired man in a white long to floor traditional shirt called Dishdasha. He became President of the Federation. We sat in his buick and went “to me.” I wasn’t interested in English at the time, but with grief halfway I kept the conversation along the way. When they got home, he took my passport and said:
You will be taken to school by car and then taken home. You cannot leave the house. Federation and home. Don’t even try to contact other foreigners.
I felt like I heard it in a nightmare. And just before I arrived, I watched a movie where a foreigner, coming to one of the Arab countries, was captured by employers. Abu Khaled — so the president was called — came out, and I was left standing in the middle of a luxurious apartment. Slowly recovering, I went down to the suitcase and started thinking what to do. But the more I thought, the more I fell into despair. I cursed the day I decided to come here.
In the evening, a car came for me, and we went to the federation. It was the last round of a competition. The local chess players approached me, we met, and the mood improved a little bit. The old man’s words did not come out of his head. Like Rubik Hachikyan in “Mimino,” I was looking for someone with good eyes. The choice fell on a young man in jeans and a mayka (the rest were in national dishdasha). After listening to me, the guy said he knew the president well and that he could not tell me that. We went up to Abu Khaled’s office, and Taher (my “saviour”) told him about my concerns. It turned out that at my home, the president said the following: “The classes will be held in the federation, at home you can’t. The driver will take you back until your driving license is ready. There are foreign chess players in Kuwait, and if they want to take private lessons, refuse.” He took my passport to obtain a residence permit.
After that, I decided to learn English.

My son enrolled in dance.
Is he... gay? I am going out to fight.
“Your hugs with stinking sweaty guys, and my hugs with beautiful dressed girls... and who is gay?

The material was taken and translated from Radit. Some comments from Russian-speaking users. A pleasant reading!



1st A child who swallowed a magnet. I did X-rays. Nothing is dangerous. He told his parents to wait until the magnet came out naturally. The next day, the child is brought back. He swallowed another magnet. Not so lucky this time. Both magnets magnetized through the intestinal wall and caused obstruction. They had to be surgically removed. I asked the parents where the child got those magnets. My father said there was an entire box in his room. Did it come to mind to remove it?



2nd A young couple arrived. The girl recently got pregnant. I look at her medical card and ask questions. “You are smoking? “Yes, about a pack a day.” “You should definitely quit smoking.” The lady rounded her eyes and said, “Why? But my sister told me that if I quit now, the embryo would start to get off and it could die.” “What? ? to ? to ? to ? to ? to ? to ? to ? to ? to »



Three A patient complained that he could not go to the toilet for several days, like constipation. I looked at him and asked about food. It turns out, he decided to lose a few pounds quickly, and for three days he did not eat anything, only drink water.



4 is I am an eye surgeon. You may not believe it, but every fourth patient believes that we remove our eyes during the operation and then insert them back. And one patient asked if it was possible to leave the eye for surgery and then come back to insert it.



5 is A man came to his father, who claimed that somewhere he caught a large dose of radiation. He scratched his eyebrows, and two hairs fell out, and he was watching a movie, and it was shown that his hair fell out when exposed to radiation.



6 is I work in an ambulance. Provoked to stroke. The patient has a curly face and all other signs of stroke. She says the feelings are the same as the last time 10 years ago. I wonder how long it has been. He says 4 days ago. “Why didn’t you call us right away? “I thought it would go through this time.”



7 is The mother brought her 17-year-old daughter to the reception with complaints of alcohol allergy. Yes, you read it right, and it’s not a joke. The mother said that when her daughter drinks 200-300 grams of vodka, she has redness of the skin, and in the morning nausea and vomiting. I had to explain that this is not an allergy, but a normal snail.



8 is A girl came to me in the pharmacy and asked for hormone pills. I looked into the computer and saw that she was buying a monthly package two weeks ago. I told her about it. She and her boyfriend took them together.



9 is Before the operation, I introduced myself to the patient and said that I would be an anesthesiologist with him. I got the answer that an anesthesiologist is not a doctor. Not a doctor? Well, if you are more comfortable.



10 is I work in an ambulance. I was called to a village near the city. The application meant that bleeding from the wound. We come, and there a woman shows a scratch on her skull and says that she was knotted by a neighbor’s cock. When we arrived there was no more blood. She scratched her scratch. I wondered how the cock got to the face, as if they didn’t fly. It turned out that she leaned to “graze the bird.” I was mentally exhausted and wrote in the papers “a wounded wound.” Fuck the bird, fuck it.



11 is A cold patient came to the injury station and demanded that I prescribe antibiotics. I explained that they are not taken with viral symptoms. She did not believe. I had to read a lecture about microbes and viruses. I hope she will pass the medical examinations at the university where she is studying.



12 is I work as an electrician in a clinic. I received a request to replace a burned lamp in the therapist's office. The ceilings are high, so I take the stairs and go. At the entrance to the office, my grandmother pulls me up the stairs and says, “Where are you without a line? “Oh, you might think, I specifically pulled out of the house a puppy to get to the reception without a turn.



Thirteen A whole family came to the hospital. The cat brought a dead mouse into their house, and they were afraid they were now sick with something.



14 is I am a veterinarian, but I also have something to say. I wondered why the owner didn’t want to vaccinate her dog. It turns out that she read somewhere that vaccines lead to dog autism.



15 is I am an ophthalmologist. He told the patient he needed reading glasses. He began to deny that it was all nonsense. I explained that age vision changes are normal, they happen to everyone. He then argued that George Clooney didn’t need reading glasses. He actually wears these glasses. Why do you compare yourself to him?



16 is The doctor prescribed glasses to me, but my parents forbade me to wear them. They believed that in a normal body everything would fix itself. has not fixed. I had to go home constantly, and myopia was only getting stronger.



17th I look at a child with a cough. His parents are anti-vaccinators. Mother Oret: "Does modern medicine have no means to cope with this disease! “I say there are, but you didn’t want to use them. The father asks, “And what means is this? » I say that vaccination. “Oh yeah, you too, goat, from the pharmacological lobby! »