bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №100940
 24.07.2014
On someone's wall in contact: "You love to jump, love and go to the army."

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №100939
 24.07.2014
Declaration of:
Please provide me with disability allowance. Diagnosis: Do not go to work.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №100938
 24.07.2014
here here :

My childhood friend lives in Magadan. The river Magadanka came out of the shores and flooded everything and everything. I am interested in the flood.

You are fucking fucking. Today the water was asleep as after the war in the city))))
Sanya: on the rainfall the gorbush chases))))
Gorbushas swimming on Lenin Street. This can only be in Magadan)

______

I live in Magadan, I confirm the completeness:)) We also have floating garages on the river and shoot down planes:) Yes, it's all right, it's floating garages that shoot down planes:)


[ + 16 - ] [9 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №100937
 24.07.2014
here here :
--------
1 (12:20:25 24/07/2014)
Refugees from Donbass, to whom Moscow allocates billions, outraged by poor conditions of detention
– – – – –
Takis, yes, also heard of cases where poor refugees suddenly turned out to be typical
Hooked...

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №100936
 24.07.2014
I am also a vegetarian and try to eat meat with vegetables.
trybros

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №100935
 24.07.2014
In the admissions committee of one of the universities (Ukraine) Davetcha observed the "classic" picture: a mother receives a daughter. The young virgin (even seemingly too young) diligently fills the papers, and her mother periodically sows her photocopies.
The breakdown of the pattern came at the time when the average score of the certificate (to say, dated 1992) was recounted from a five-point scale to a twelve-point scale. It turns out that the daughter is going to mother!

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №100934
 24.07.2014
This is:
In the United States, every psychologist has his own psychologist. It is a circle of hell.

This is not the circle of hell, but the prevention of the complex of God. – – – –

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №100933
 24.07.2014
We are gathering with my family on a trip to the sea, since I am very upset in transport, I was looking for a cure for upset and stumbled on one of the forums:

Who knows the best way to go to the sea? They say that before going out to the sea you need to eat half a kilo of red tomatoes.

It is best to eat something red. Red spots look beautiful on board and entertain other passengers

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №100932
 24.07.2014
Russian army soldier Vadim Grigoryev on his page in the social network "VKontakte" published evidence of the attack of the territory of Ukraine by Russia. Thus, Grigoriev on Wednesday, July 23, at 14:19 published the post “All night dumb in Ukraine”."
sesitsky sergey: Tomorrow on the page of his sergeant will be a note: "All night the soldier Grigoriev was stabbed".

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №100931
 24.07.2014
1 - Perfomans for the day of VDV to arrange)))
Leather trousers, Maku grid and dance on the platform under the Army of Lovers? )))

2 - Platform - Booth - will it fit?))
2 of O! Definitely! 😉
Under the song of Mercury – Mustafa Ibrahim!))

1 of ggr))

In addition, the stage should serve as a huge bowl with peppers. Oh oh! Make a musical! In addition, everything is removed by one plan from the window of an incoming electric car! A crowd of airmen pursue the forehead, he climbs onto a cage with watermelons, watermelons climb onto the cage, shake it, then this whole bunch falls from the platform back, and there is a fountain!

From the broken cage on the water of the fountain float ripe peppers symbolizing liberation from prejudice!
Vickyuk cries and makes harakiri

2 and there is also a scene with male synchronous swimming!)))) Shoot the same!!! to

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №100930
 24.07.2014
You know, there are people who say "An ideal society cannot be built". And then they think something like this:
Let us abolish slavery. Let us go to the feudal system. and what? This is not an ideal society. We can even theorize that in a few centuries we will transition to capitalism. Per, although at this stage it is difficult even to imagine, in a thousand years we will even build communism. But that is not utopia! Creating an ideal society is impossible. They will always be dissatisfied. Give people everything they require – and they’ll demand more. Eliminate murder and theft – there will be barbarians fighting in the streets. And since it is impossible to build an ideal society, all this abolition of slavery is blasphemy and hypocrisy. We will not abolish slavery.

I feel like there are more and more people like this lately. But let’s hope they won’t. And then we can do today better than yesterday, and tomorrow better than today. Yes, the ideal cannot be achieved, so it will never end. But it is only good if each next day is better than the previous one!

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №100929
 24.07.2014
Author of task:

I drank beer from a friend.I wanted to sleep, they left with a lovely home.He laid me down, he went for a couple of hours to go for a walk.Wake up in the morning, he is not, the tube does not take.The question: do I still have a lover and a girlfriend, if he is from another city, she had a lot of beer at home, and her number he has?
_______________________________________________________

So what was the answer? Interesting how the story ended :)

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №100928
 24.07.2014
here here :
and----
here here :
#16 2014-07-23 21:10
We had a case. To the man at the dacha came bombs to climb. Well, he, in order to teach them, put the poison in a bottle and left it on the table - the same type. The gods of this meal shrunk and gave the soul to God. The man was convicted of deliberate harm to his health, which resulted in death, well or so. The real deadline.

Well, it’s an old bike, we had tougher.
My grandmother used the mushrooms (for herself!!!) He went into the cave. And the mushrooms were either incorrect, or they were spoiled, in general, 2 thieves were trapped, breaking 1) the gate, 2) the door of the house, 3) the cover of the basement (everything was on the castles, they were pulled out with meat). The thieves were barely left alive. So they filed a complaint against the grandmother, they were judged. Conditionally 2 years. They were not just imprisoned for age. So be careful when you cook something, or suddenly take someone, unintentionally.
----------
In such cases, the main thing is to deny the intent: a bear trap stood on a rat, poison in vodka for rubbing the radiculite, bricks on the roof for repairing the extractor... And the grandmother was not lucky with the lawyer (or the thieves were lucky with relatives)...

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №100927
 24.07.2014
I sit in a line at the clinic. I notice that people leave one cabinet more often than from the others. I looked at the tablet and it turned out to be a toilet :)))

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №100926
 24.07.2014
I like to get a salary. I work for her, I can say.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №100925
 24.07.2014
I hear my mother squeezing out of the house and I see a picture - in the Basar volley (SAO) my mother stands, pressing her back to the volley grid, and Basar stands on his back legs, so that his mother was between the front and touches her face in her face. I run to them in the volley, I resort to grabbing Basara, I pull him away, I give him the ass, he goes offended. It turns out that the mother went into the volley, he ran to her and pulled something in her hand, she looked at it, and it was a dead mouse. The mother stumbled and threw the mouse, Baska raised it and decided to feed her mother with it, and I found them.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №100924
 24.07.2014
The heat came, the war broke out in the office with a new force between the one who is hot and the one who is blowing. The room is large, air conditioning is built into the ceiling with a switch integrated in the wall. An indicator on the switch burns. After the phrase of one of the frozen "who turned on the blue light again!A plan was born. The lighthouse was glued with an opaque white film and a black spot was drawn with a marker on it. The air conditioner is always turned off. I noticed it only a week later when it was a little cold, and I turned on the condy too hard.

[ + 30 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №100923
 24.07.2014
Doctors in general from their initially small salaries, like everyone else, pay taxes.
> which chinuche distribute unclearly where... And when they come to the example
> in the passport table or other similar institution then do not see that relation to themselves
> which their patients demand from them. This is when doctors can come in any such
> the institution and without nerves and kilometre lines will be able to do what they need, then and
> others can be treated normally. Unfortunately, this is not the case, the taxpayer
> pay like everyone else, and treat them for some reason as a servant. Go to Gastronomers
> prefer to go out on the street if you are completely impatient.
Who says that only doctors should do it? Or, in principle, I was struck there, so will I stumble too? I sincerely regret you. I do not treat doctors nervously, including at work, and I do not even create cavernous for officials. It’s a matter of personal qualities, nothing more. Excuses can be found for any low, and for lazy, too.
There is too much shit in the world to multiply it.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №100922
 24.07.2014
See also Russia 24. Show the militias.
Voice after picture: "Simple Donetsk guys defending their Orthodox land..."
And a man with a wild beard, almost black, squeezes in a tube.
“Well, if the journalists had a bigger nose like Buratino, he would have gone around the ground and kicked them in the ass.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №100921
 24.07.2014
How is Carlson imaginary? Whom does Fregen see? And the thieves?

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