Remember when we were caught in 8th grade when we smoked under the stairs?
Okay, I still have time to dress!

You read the best today:
“Find me, help me!”
What? You are laughing,
Falling in the boots?

Or maybe you laughed.
He cried and cried,
When every disappointment
Was there a desire?

Vasa is looking for a girl.
He met her in the morning.
Leave the child!
You are worshipping! Ura to!

And of course the desire.
Drawing Patchwork
Provoking outbursts
A lifetime breakdown!

As a shit, a shit, a life.
Noun, noun without end!
The whole country is struggling!
Laugh at the rabbit!

Tired of the best.
An annoying shit?
What kind of shit, shit.
Do you press “funny”?! to

From Habr:

AAA: I am a programmer. And I wish, ideally, that the compiler would solve this problem for me.
BBB: I am a compiler. Ideally, I would like a programmer to solve this problem for me.
CCC: I am a processor. Guys, what are you talking about?
DDD: I am an electric charge. Stop chasing me here and then I will hit...
I am a tomato...

XXX: Grey hot as usual.
YYY: What is it?
xxx: They and Max held a scientific conversation yesterday about why young people in Russia drink a lot of beer. They came to the conclusion that because if you drink juice water, a lot of money will go away, and you will drink everything quickly. Lack of time to talk. They assumed that you need to use something difficult to drink.
Then I decided to do an experiment. We went to the supermarket, picked up three bottles of drinking yogurt of different kinds, and baked breads. Then sat down on the bench at the entrance and drank.
YYY: And how then?
XX: Yes, he said, they sat great. Tastefully, and the girls approached, asked, type, is it fashionable now?
YYYY : )
xxx: But, as he says, all this enthusiasm is a fist, compared to the face of the grandmother, who came out of the entrance and managed to get a breath in the lungs, seeing that the youth is drinking beer again. So and passed by, with the air picked up in the chest, a bold step :)))
YYYYYYYYYYYYYY :)

I want to have sex with you.
Is it a hint?? to

Aladdin (22:12:33 24/02/2010)
We have a new game in the mask.

Aladdin (22:12:42 24/02/2010)
It is called "guess if there is a car in this cage".

One group said:
I drove a taxi to pick up a friend’s girlfriend, who was with a girlfriend. He was in the rear seat, his girlfriend was closer to him, well, he was strong, decided to embrace.
Stop touching me!! to
One group (not expecting it from yourself):
You haven't seen my stitch yet, and you're already refusing!
The driver was crying.

I am so happy to live in our country, but I feel like I will not survive.

The parties arrived at the court, where they were met by a pre-retirement judge with universal sadness in the eyes.

Judge Grandma: Do computers and devices belong to you?
Grandma: Yes to me.
Judge: For what purposes do you use the computer, and what information is on the disks and flash cards?
Grandma: Because I am an elderly person and I find it difficult to communicate with my girlfriends offline, we use the Internet to communicate, and I also use the computer to buy various goods, medicines and food via the Internet. On the disks are my personal information and the archives of my family (photos, personal letters, personal accounting), correspondence with social and pension services. If the court needs to read the information, and there will be a corresponding court order, I am ready to disclose the information for the court.
Judge: What browser do you use?
Grandma: Mozilla, as well as AI, because not all websites of the state. The organs see Mozilla
Judge: I agree with you, but I recommend you try the Opera too.
After such a dialogue between the grandmother and the judge, the lawyer respectfully looked at them both.
Judge: What is your education?
Grandmother: There was a higher medical school, but because I was retired for almost twenty years, the diploma was canceled.
Judge: How did the operatives and investigators behave during the search?
Grandmother: Humbly and aggressively.
Judge: Did you try to protest in some way?
Grandma: No, because my family remembers 38 years very well.

The group VKontakte - girls who do not smoke, like cars, do not marry, like shoes, do not drink, like propolis, do not swallow or smell anything and consider this normal. I go in. Participants: Sergey, Dmitry, Sergey and Mikhail

From Irek Murtazin:
Once explained to one grandfather in the village who are gay, the grandfather listened and cried out:
Nietzsche Indie, and BIT BOOK
In translation from Tatar "How it is, there is the same shit..."
*** by
"Nichek inde, and bitt bok..." - the fucking need to learn, half of life situations in this phrase Aksakala

Let us keep this as a note all the time in order not to forget:
Pay for the Internet!
Turn off the pellets!
Change your cat!
Remove your hand from your face!
Call the girl and tell her that you love her. Stop letting go, go and find the courage to meet someone not in contact but on the street! (I need to emphasize)
Have you ever seen time? Tomorrow, go to bed, go to sleep in the morning.

Everyone works, maybe I can do it too?
Please wish me to reconcile with the person I love.
To all those who are pleased, careful, indifferent, of mutual love and... take care of your loved ones.

Status in contact after the match Russia-Canada
The national team of Russia is looking for a goalkeeper with a height of 122cm and a width of 183cm!

She: Dear, did you have anyone before me?
He: Well, I actually spoke and you haven’t been there yet.

He: If you really want, we can go to the ZAGS tomorrow and file an application. Just go to the pharmacy and then go to the building, okay?
Why the pharmacy and the building?
He: in the pharmacy - a corvalol for the mother... and in the building - behind the helmet. When my mom drinks Corvalola, she’ll want to strike me on the head.

<hattik> I lie in the intensive, I breathe through the tube
<hattik> from boredom I rub into one toy c note of my way-to-way, there a crowd of us wrapped one shit, but you will not understand to play for this
<hattik> in general injection time I press the nurses call button
<hattik> and here one of our in the chat throws "luck back again this fool from the 707 chamber wants something"

(23 February)

Max Art: Oh... a pack of Raphael under the bed I found like I pushed it there on the street.
Mezeya for [Max Art]: look, maybe the guests didn’t all leave.

People, I don’t understand one thing – why are you all shrinking that our few medals have been taken? Is there a patriarch and a prayer? With such funding for sports, the lack of normal conditions for training - we are still very even looking good! To win the Olympics is not to smoke on the balcony. These are wild loads, years of training, injuries, pain, and fear! Most people in our country will not even walk 3 floors an extra time! And then, we have half the country! In the USSR, a drunk 12-year-old teenager was a disgrace for the whole area! And now it’s fashionable – to cheat, to argue, to watch the Olympics and sincerely wonder – why did we get so few medals? God has not turned away from us, we are all His children. It is we who turn away from it and only remember when we are bad! If at least one person supports me, I have not written it in vain. Well, Russia, is it now weak with collective reason to correct itself?

I love my girlfriend. She observes fasting, and as you know, you cannot have sex during fasting. And on February 23 she gave me DARTs with DROTICS!
WOW: Congratulations to you! You are a drunk! )) A whole month and a half Bush "rotat"! HDD
Shit... Fuck...