bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №145137
 26.09.2017
to this:
Little today argued that the robot rabbit from "Well, wait!" is a reference to the second Terminator, because he also recovered from the pit.
– is
Repair it. This is Terminator 2 - reference to "Well, wait!". This release of the cartoon was released 7 years before Terminator.

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №145136
 26.09.2017
I wrapped up so that I just replied to the SMS about payroll 'ok, spsb'.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №145135
 26.09.2017
But then Paris avenged Achilles by shooting his heel.

Is it possible without spoilers?

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №145134
 26.09.2017
A colleague asked for an external hard drive (bringing it somehow with him, so he saw it). I had a lot of files. I told him not to go through his personal documents. He promised that he would not do anything like that.



For the sake of interest, I cut the face of this colleague from the photo and inserted it into the porn video to the place of the actress. It all looked silly, dumb, but only if the intent was understood. He took this video, then in the folder "photos" on the hard disk created a folder "his photos", then created a folder "personal documents", then created a folder "personal photos", then created another hidden folder, etc. There were about 12 transitions. I added this video at the end.



When I got the hard drive back, he said I’m a finished dude and the jokes I’ve had are pudoric.



The question is, who of us is right?



P.S. When asked why he was sitting in my personal documents, he replied that “it was curious.”

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №145133
 26.09.2017
I went for a comrade today. We get into the house and get up on a free parking spot.

While waiting, the lady of Kia Rio enters the courtyard and begins to be outraged in elevated tones: "This is my place, I am parking here! Go and find another! » Well, we are not the people of conflict, we say, “Lady, literally 10 minutes. We take a man and leave. We specifically came closer to the entrance, or his bags were heavy. It would seem that an adequate person will understand and will not develop a conflict, but not. The lady blocks us from leaving and with a furious expression of the face: "Now my husband will do it! »

Fuck, that was lacking. We are two, now the third is out, so the physical superiority is guaranteed. I don’t want to ruin my mood in an empty place.

The lady, meanwhile, called her husband and waited with a lustful smile for him to find out. has gone out. “What’s the problem, guys? » We explained. It was written on his face that she had already struck him with her honor. He takes his wife's keys, and under the spouse's hustle, he parks his car elsewhere.



has gone out. I found out. The Beautiful.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №145132
 26.09.2017
Imagine you came to work and saw your colleague tapping the table. You think, “What a bad character he has.” At this time, your colleague thinks about how on the way to work someone pushed him and then screamed at him. “Anyone in my place would be angry,” he said. We can’t get into people’s heads and understand why they behave in one way or another. Instead, we tend to explain people’s behavior by their characteristics, and we often explain our own behavior by external circumstances. Thus, the fundamental error of attribution is the tendency of a person to explain the actions and behavior of other people by their personal characteristics, rather than by external factors and situations.

There were a number of fine experiments confirming this phenomenon, but Harry did not want to go into detail.

Hpmor

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №145131
 26.09.2017
YYY: Oh, appreciate the news: The Vatican has changed the rules of recognizing events as miracles...
XXX: Did they find the standard of the miracle in the Louvre in the Chamber of Measures and Weights?

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №145130
 26.09.2017
Yesterday was a joke. A black student enters the audience who is late for a couple. And there was only the last chair that stood next to the board. I told him to take a chair and sit down. He approaches looking at the chair and says I can’t sit on him because he’s white. I am in shock. I think Nietzsche makes statements. I’m sorry we don’t have black chairs. After my words, he swallowed. And it turned out that he didn't know Russian well and couldn't express himself, the chair was covered with tiny crumbs, once standing near the board.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №145129
 26.09.2017
One of the developers of the high-quality random number table built it from the fractional noise of a diode chain and processed rap music. If the first is one of the best artificial sources of white noise, the second is not politcorrectly called "black noise".

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №145128
 26.09.2017
Where are the Indigo Children? No, they go around the area, the same blue.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №145127
 26.09.2017
XX: You specifically indicate where the colors to fix: here or here?
Wow everywhere! Because color is everywhere!

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №145126
 26.09.2017
I would like to encourage a girl from задолбаек "7 reasons for my loneliness"
What you call shortcomings can easily prove to be merits – I’ll honestly say that I’d like to meet a girl like you ^^
I also like fantasy, fantasy, computer games, although not a fan of anime, but I watch often.
I like full (although I’m very sluggish) and I don’t understand many things that are considered beautiful, such as heels or cosmetics.
No, I do not offer myself, I am 31, forever alone and generally a dumb and uncommunicable type, I understand that no one needs a naphyg.
But I'm all about the fact that once you liked me, there'll be another you'll be happy with ;-)
And beat on everyone who is dissatisfied with something, personal life is called so, because it is only yours, only you decide! Do not grieve and do not grieve.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №145125
 26.09.2017
<...>
xxx: punitive cooking and punitive agriculture
Yyy: Curative cooking...that’s what my cooking style is called.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №145124
 26.09.2017
September 28 is the day of the nuclear worker, the day of Homer Simpson, not your favorite director.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №145123
 26.09.2017
In multi-storey houses of Western Europe began to massively weld garbage pipes.

Because they began to make a great need of people who recently massively came from the southern places.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №145122
 26.09.2017
In Russia, bread and cheese will be declared harmful products

That we have already passed. And salt is white death, and sugar is harmful, and even eggs at one time had to be rehabilitated.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №145121
 26.09.2017
Commentary from YouTube:
A little about myself: I am an ordinary Hindu native, here you see my swastika. I worship the Slavic gods: Yarila, Swaroga, Peru. Peruna especially, you can see a sign of two lightning. I am 14 years old and my grandmother will be 88 in 12 years, these numbers mean a strong bond of generations. I am very shy, so I came up with an imaginary friend from Germany, whom I greet all the time, his name is also German. In the future, I want to become a crane worker, so I often portray a crane with my hand.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №145120
 26.09.2017
Announcement on the plane.
Fast, high-quality, cheap repair of Masonic lodges.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №145119
 26.09.2017
I bought a Chinese red cloth, and the whole red cloth woke up in the morning. Approximately the feet.

yyy: Fuck, I had such a dark blue set of bed linen. The Starry Night by Van Gogh. My parents gave me socks (but not socks). Dryer and Dryer. I woke up, went to wash, and there... a shit! The body is blue, half the face is blue, and all this nihua is not washed off. How to go to work is unclear. Two hours in the shower removed the paint.

XXX: You wash and wash, you call from work - when will you come??? And you say, while I can’t, I’m still blue.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №145118
 26.09.2017
I worked in a photography salon. "Cards" were not so many, but it would be enough to settle a small state in South America. But I remembered one woman. An ordinary woman of uncertain age, aiming for 60s with a tissue bag in her hands. The further dialogue:

Hi, are you taking pictures?

Yes, go ahead and sit down.

Can animals be photographed as well?

In general, at the time we were only taking photos of documents and only people, but I had free time and there was no turn, so I decided to go to meet.

Maybe even animals.

I want to photograph a cat.

Come here, let us take a picture.

He has me with me. Here in the bag. You know, he died a week ago, and I don’t have a photo of him.

In general, referring to the fact that my religion does not allow me to engage in such actions over the corpse of the unfortunate, I refused. The woman was angry for a long time and said, “What are you doing here at all?”

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