bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №95893
 27.03.2014
This is this.

I add :
here here :
Recently, the ventilation grid in the kitchen stopped working. I put a flame - there is no pull.
What am I?
I sincerely wish everyone who crashes their refrigerators into the air pipes not to stop at the achievement and crash their microwave directly into the sewage collector. They are smart, beats.
___________________________________________________________________________
Any windshield is drawn to the roof, and on top of it is usually a shallow, easily removable gesture cushion. Algorithm: 1) Carefully remove the cushion. 2) We put the lome inside. 3) Carefully put the cushion in place.
To avoid complications, we evacuate from the roof through the adjacent entrance, or conduct an act of retaliation in the deep night.

Do not do harm that can be attracted. Throw away a kilogram of ice cream, sooner or later in the apartment of the man will stand such a smell that he will be happy to pull out his refrigerator. (For the reliability of the story, you can drop a kilogram of dead pigeons)

--------------------
You are fucking fucking, fool. The smell will stand all over the wind. Standing for a few months and removing it will not be anything.
Throw them away, maybe even uranium.

[ + 33 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №95892
 27.03.2014
Daria is
They went to Peter. The water climb is called bodlon. The shoulder, the shoulder

Svetlana
I also always say shoulder hanging – it’s a hose on the clothes. Plastics are shoulders.

Daria is
The hanging is a hanging. I am a mosquito, I know better.

Svetlana
Another hanging is a wooden standing or sloping structure on which a mantle can be laid. If everything in the world is called a hangover, you can go crazy, so the plastic piece is shoulders.
By the way, in the Urals, the mouthpiece is called a whistle.

Daria is
What

Svetlana
my family was one of the few who said it was OK :) Yes, another platform for eggs is a sting. We all said so in Chelyabinsk :) one-bedroom apartment - half Tuesday

Daria is
x_x
This is worst

Svetlana
Okay, don’t even say half Tuesday? A large spider is a spider.
Take a shirt and squeeze my back!
The egg broke again.

Daria is
It hurt me physically to read it.
Now the eyes run out.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №95891
 27.03.2014
The dining room of our institute has imposed sanctions against Ukraine and ceased to make cottlets "in Kiev"

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №95890
 27.03.2014
The Seasonality.

The spring... the woman is blooming... ))
My wife is an old fool. It is you, men, who only wake up in the spring, and we, women, create all year round.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №95889
 27.03.2014
XXX is greeting. What plaster do you have in your hand? From smoking, is it?
from MMORPG.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №95888
 27.03.2014
Zombiracer: Today through the internal portal came 3 messages in a row.
Sergeev is on vacation for two weeks. His duties are temporarily performed by the Cowboys.
Kowalski is on vacation for two weeks. His duties are temporarily performed by the City.
The city is on vacation for two weeks. Sergey temporarily performed his duties.
Here are they. The modern seals!

[ + 5 - ] Comment quote №95887
 27.03.2014
B: I don't remember literally, but like "a real man when he sees his wife with a lover must say ah sorry continue, and go to the kitchen to make coffee, a real lover must then be able to continue to love a woman, and then go out to drink coffee cooked by his husband."
Y: The correct conclusion here can only be one – a real woman owes nothing to anyone!

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №95886
 27.03.2014
Abroad will help us: the US will support Ukraine with the purchase of hemp. They told us not to do...

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №95885
 27.03.2014
The Guitar Forum

> bar shame compared to solo))))

Mandarin hernia compared to azimut

[ + 21 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №95884
 27.03.2014
You know what the U.S. Navy’s aircraft carrier attack group is.

I know that it is not the one who has the largest group who dictates, but the one who has the eggs. In the last two weeks, the whole world has been trying to figure out who has eggs and who doesn’t.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №95883
 27.03.2014
From the hospital:
I got a happy ticket today. In the morning gastroscopy and in the evening enema".

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №95882
 27.03.2014
The xxx:
He is a terrible believer.

The xxx:
Everyone was afraid to go to hell, thinking about how to smooth up guilt.

The xxx:
Drunk, hit Google "casino rating 2014", went to play, won money. And gave everything to charity to a child at the church!! to

The xxx:
He said that he redeemed his sins in this way.

YYYY :
Well good guys. For him the hell in hell cottage will be chilled.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №95881
 27.03.2014
People have to believe. Or make a look. Visually, there is no difference. People will be pleased.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №95880
 27.03.2014
The heavy people...

A friend Sergei, who lived in Germany for twenty years, told about the women there:
I lived with a French woman, lived with an Italian woman, lived in Poland, and in general, was married.
I had Swedes and English women and even a Japanese woman, but with the Germans themselves it didn’t work out, there wasn’t one, very much they, like to say, were not Russians...
The heavy people.
Although, lying, one day I still tried, had a romance with a German, I did not like it, it was enough for me exactly for two days.
The case was this:
We met on someone’s birthday. Her name was Emma.
We talked a little, liked each other and ran out of the noise together, went for a walk around the city, and the next evening Emma suggested:
“Serie, we have so many common interests that we could try to live together.
I didn’t mind and found myself in her bed that night.
The night went great.
At six o’clock in the morning, she shook me and said:
The series! The series! Rise up! Come on, you have to go.
I don’t know why I’m going to break up so early. And I say:
“Emma, my dear, where do you hurry? You can sleep a few more hours, today is Sunday, and you can’t go to work.
She made an official face and said:
“No, I don’t have to go to work, but I have a lot of homework and I want to be alone. If you don’t get up within five minutes and leave my apartment, I’ll call the police.
It hit me like the current. Naturally – I jumped, in forty seconds I dressed up and rushed to the door, Emma went to accompany me, and on the threshold and says:
Serry, at what time will you be waiting tonight? I make a delicious cabbage soup.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №95879
 27.03.2014
Details of the capture of the medium landing ship of project 773 U401 “Kirovograd” by the special forces of the GRU of the Russian Armed Forces have become known. For more than 20 hours, the Russian special forces shouted to the Ukrainian sailors in the speaker the command “Who does not jump – that Moskal”. After 20 hours, exhausted sailors and officers were loaded in trucks and sent to the hospital.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №95878
 27.03.2014
From the news:
This was stated by the deputy chairman of the Central Bank Ksenia Yudaeva, reports RIA Novosti. According to her, the ruble is the most protected currency in terms of protection against sanctions.

Hm, I just remembered the joke about the Unfathomable Joe now?

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №95877
 27.03.2014
111: Something face you all have fun after the holidays, for Anya like a fox was chasing!
222 (sick dark): So protein is not enough for everyone

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №95876
 27.03.2014
Fifteen years ago in London, she accompanied a friend-artist to the dentist (he had a sharp pain and he didn’t speak English at all). I said something, but loudly. And here, I come, and say, Hello, this is my friend... And suddenly I realize that I don’t remember the word “pain.” Therefore, without a pause, continued: His teeth were in great sorrow. (I just had friends-musicists, their group was called Great sorrow) The doctor first trembled, and then rotted like an exploded...

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №95875
 27.03.2014
Please help my friend:
I need your brain :D
YYYY: well
YYY: I am here
My brain has become popular lately.
He has sex more than me.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №95874
 27.03.2014
Haber, the news that the MS-DOS sources are posted.

One commentary: Thank you! I was just looking for something to read.

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