bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №62395
 05.04.2012
stash manager on the phone with the customer burned "Our commercial offer fucking fucking!"

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №62394
 05.04.2012
Vladka (11:17:42): And I accidentally got novocain in my tongue instead of gum.

Vladka (11:18:06): Truth I suspect that this is so that I don’t get a lot of shit during the procedure.

Vladika (11:18:20): The fourth hour went away

Wendy (11:18:24): Mom was happy

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №62393
 05.04.2012
From CSS:
M@ks: The bath of the reader!
I.D.O.LWho is it that shakes there?
M@ks: Close the fist!
I.D.O.LYour socks smell!
M@ks: Go to us!
I.D.O.LGo to Mom!
M@ks: I live by myself.
I.D.O.LIt’s because your socks smell!

[ + 44 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №62392
 05.04.2012
About Woody

From life - today during breakfast I accidentally turned on the television on the Disney cartoon about Woody's cuddle and, looking at the cartoon, came to an interesting conclusion - Woody cuddle is a symbol of the United States and the way of life of Americans.
Judge for yourself - a certain beast lives peacefully, does not touch anyone, here the Woody's devil takes to him and begins to either infuse some ugliness that the beast does not need, or try to improve the life of the beast from what is only worse. As a result, the beast tries to drive the deer away, but there is dynamite, grenades, etc. Eventually, the house of the beast is ruined, the beast itself is depraved to the unrecognizable, and Woody's daddy with an idiotic name runs to the next victim.

Does nothing remind you?

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №62391
 05.04.2012
[12:42:57] lifehouse: I noticed here by chance
[12:43:04] lifehouse: what was last eaten yesterday night

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №62390
 05.04.2012
Valeff: In the courtyard throws a drop - it is the month of December!

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №62389
 05.04.2012
Grachi, not understanding the situation, killed the stormman.

[ + 30 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №62388
 05.04.2012
And yet the best spy trick I’ve seen is how in Mission: Impossible 4 Tom Cruise cuts the glass with a laser.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №62387
 05.04.2012
The morning. and Sber. In front of the terminal there is a small crowd. No one in the box. At the terminal, the virgin explains to the people why they need it. I walk around the crowd in the urge to take the ticket, the voice rises: where you are, we all stand here! This is the development of technology! Previously it was the turn to the box office, now it is the turn to the electronic box office, b..tt!!! to

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №62386
 05.04.2012
The electronics could run off. But he did not, because he was kind.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №62385
 05.04.2012
Lectures of literature.
The author's words on the example of Mayakovsky "Poet in Visits to the Sun"

The Teacher :
- But the strange sunshine flowed and the degree...

The kids are =))
The egg!!! to

The Teacher :
- O_O... Idiots, >_<.

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №62384
 05.04.2012
Conversation of groups:

What day was February 21?
IRA: February
A day what?? to
And yes, on Wednesday.
Fuck the number!!! to
It is 21!!! to
Alina: Yes of course.

Good guys...

[ + 26 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №62383
 05.04.2012
Recently heard from a student a new element of the Mendeleev table - "Oxygen Oxide" XD

Imagine you are walking on the street and in front of you something whispers and drops... oxygen is oxidized to bleat.)

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №62382
 05.04.2012
Conversation of spouses:
“Ira, be a friend, put my phone on charge.
I am not your friend, I am your wife.

[ + 41 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №62381
 05.04.2012
What are you doing?
I went to the bath. I washed and shaved.
What can a girl shave?
Under the mouse, under the mouse.
Stop tormenting animals and shaving them.

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №62380
 05.04.2012
In windy weather, the Scottish army looks even more frightening

Handsome hair can scare anyone.

XXX: If you were to... or they were to be in front of you...

Wow: and you throw out the sword and let’s roast... Oh, I can’t... Oh, you’re tired... the men you’re going to scare with this... you’ve got the turtles hidden from the wind in the armor.

How terrible is it for the soldiers of the enemy army, if the turtles did not hide, but instead inspired?

WOW: Yes, the spectacle of combat pedorras in the attack... brr

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I remembered that joke too.

You only know what...

Wow, what an army from such a spectacle will turn away and show the enemy a back!

Will they be caught?! to

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №62379
 05.04.2012
I am a smoker (I am 24 years old) and my colleague (she is 48 years old). My husband is married four times and I have never been there. A colleague tells about his first marriage: "I was 19 years old, I call my mother and tell her I won't come overnight. My mother’s question: Why? My colleague replied: yes, mom, this is the case, I got married yesterday..." I come home from work in the evening and tell this story to my mom. Mom says "and what, I would be glad, at least somebody will take you!"((

[ + 35 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №62378
 05.04.2012
>> In the meantime, some new Lie has come out today!
>> and

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №62377
 05.04.2012
Grandma cooked soup with foxes, and instead of peanut she puts melissa. I sit down and can’t decide whether I eat soup or drink tea.

[ + 29 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №62376
 05.04.2012
Judging by the expression of the thin intestine, in ancient times in Russia, real boys were not even measured with whispers.

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