bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №140273
 07.04.2017
XX: You were so bad yesterday, and the phone was busy for 40 minutes?
Wow, these dwarfs are already oh... spring exacerbation in them!
Q: Are you talking about the subway administration?
WOW: Well yes. voluntary rally against terrorism. And the quotas are down, how many people should be! High school students also require it, and they are not adults! And on TV will be pizza... showing volunteers. As for taxi drivers in Peter, what prices hit, and on the smy - for free.
Should terrorists be afraid and repent? Or are they doing it for them?
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah What do you mean for them?
WOW: So such a crowd of women and children is a gift for these goats.
The debility of the Podolsk leadership is already a diagnosis.

[ + 25 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №140272
 07.04.2017
Nihilistically

He was not a servant, not a man.
Not born, not a grandmother.
Not a cat, not a cat.

Not dead, not God

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №140271
 07.04.2017
What will schools do without teachers, factories without workers, clinics without doctors, bankers without office plankton? Wouldn’t it happen that employers are the first to call out and push vacancies up to heaven, so as not to suffer monstrous losses and create collapse?

Oh, you are a simple soul... neither public schools nor public hospitals will suffer terrible losses. Everyone will be stressed. The director / chief physician will report that he is heavily engaged in the search for personnel, and will continue to receive his unworthy salary, and so on, higher in the chain. Their well-being is extremely weakly dependent on the "results of the work of the "confident organization" - mainly on the correct reports "up". They have very little right. To take and increase the salary of the teacher / doctor arbitrarily, not in accordance with the approved "on the very top" staff schedule and tariff grid? Here, after such a director / chief physician can fly away from the chair to the unemployed. Therefore there will be Nothing but a crowd of hungry unemployed and a crowd of the “unemployed” people. Whether there will be a flourishing of private schools and hospitals... but it is unlikely. Because to pay for these inexpensive services, the people simply do not have money.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №140270
 07.04.2017
The new company of Elon Musk will connect the human brain to the computer
The Bolsheviks learned to connect the human brain to the man himself.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №140269
 07.04.2017
<Julio> And you have the feeling that you want to give someone in the wreath, but you don’t know who and why?
<Pedro> Continuously

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №140268
 07.04.2017
XXX: A woman’s voice behind the window – “What are you shouting at me?” And immediately hysterical (and most likely drunk) male - "Well, I am on the emotions!"

Yyy: Oh, the universal answer! Can I use them?

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №140267
 07.04.2017
He was lying in the resuscitation department after a stroke... A man – “fresh” – just suffered a stroke, lay down and was sent to us. He entered the corner chamber, sat down, left the chamber and... lost himself. He went out into the corridor and began to wander through the department. I entered the women’s room. For two minutes he stood on the threshold of the eyes on the lying women, and those in turn looked at him. Then he suddenly asked the nurse there:

Where is the guide? ! to

Caregiver (natural woman Larisa with a sense of humor, and in the future "caregiver"):

I am for her! What did you want?

When are we leaving? We all stand and stand.

Man, where are you standing?

In the Blessing! The train is still standing.

What is your coupe?

At the end of the corridor!

- So you go in the couch, go to bed, or the train will hit, and you will stay on the perron.

thank you! I was running! ... →

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №140266
 07.04.2017
A young man of the class “like the entire civil fleet” appeared on the stage. This was similar to all the Tolkienists I knew and a bit to Tolkienism as a cultural phenomenon. He started reading immediately, interrupting the host who tried to introduce him. It was a song. In a sense, it was literally a song that he read in a re-reader, which was guessed on the refrens, and on the fact that he read in the rhythm of his usual performance under the guitar.

Technically, the poem was a ballad. The wounded goat ran to the royal throne, collapsed, pulled the fox out of under the shirt and reports: the troops are defeated one after the other, the unborn of the winters and already four cities with unreadable names of Celtic sound are captured by the enemy. And the king – whether the government was in exile or in an alternative residence – is concerned:
Did the capital not fall?
Three times I am interested. Orthodox in our way.
When he asked this question for the third time, I couldn’t stand it and shouted out of the room:
Kathmandu is a double!

The contest was broken, we were asked, and we went on to drink. As if not interrupted.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №140265
 07.04.2017
My daughter graduated. She is the only girl who was not allowed to participate in the dance because she is small. At the same time, she is the only girl who is professionally engaged in dancing, having a bunch of awards and grades, including international. The child was crying first and then laughing. I seem to have discovered a new law of pattern interaction: adhering to one leads to the rupture of the other.

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