bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №148523
 26.01.2018
#yo, the nigga

Is it acceptable to compliment a black girl for her beautiful face color?

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №148522
 26.01.2018
When do you stop working?

"This is when your legs seem to have grown to the floor, and your back seems to have torn your spine and your head sounds like an orchestra!

Do you finish?

No is! It means working another hour.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №148521
 26.01.2018
You have repented, repented, repented and repented. The former sick man who wrote on the debt was a criminal who let the girl in a circle with his brothers and was very upset that his daughter is not respected by evil neighbors. He was sitting!

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №148520
 26.01.2018
My husband and I practice this fun: coming home, he sometimes jokingly and horribly asks me:

Where is he? ! to (I am a lover)

My husband is waiting for me at home for lunch. I break into the apartment and from the threshold a terrible sound:

Where is she? ! to

And I see in the toilet the aunt-president of our JSC, who came, as it turned out, to seal the water meter.

Aunt turned red and quickly retreated with the words:

E – I have gone. Let your husband explain it.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №148519
 26.01.2018
Discussing the news that the spread of electric vehicles can lead to overload of the electric grids:
xxx: Therefore, in order not to be left without transport during a black-out, it is necessary to have a reserve diesel generator at home
Why at home? Put it in the luggage! There are still two in the TESL.
zzz: in the front luggage generator, in the rear solar to it.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №148518
 26.01.2018
In general, often carrying small children on your arms is really bad, as often as stepping. Eating and sleeping should be on time.
Fuck, now it’s clear where the “office seruins” came from – they were not taught to eat and hate on schedule.

We don’t even walk in the corridor, but how it got!! That’s why we live in shit.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №148517
 26.01.2018
No, the rights of the older children are violated when the younger ones appear very well, killing to the root the mimic ideas of brothers and sisters, who were so requested and wanted. I want big ones! To play and communicate! Not the babies who are crumbling and crumbling. And even more so, they didn’t want to become babysitters at the age difference of 10 years or more. In every school there are children’s rights stands. And they have such rights that parents can just cry...with hotline phones. They call, they complain, they complain. And they are right!

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №148516
 26.01.2018
The flexibility of church dogmas is simply astonishing: the church has not had time to agree that the earth is round, as poops are already "sacrifying" space ships.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №148515
 26.01.2018
I go with my son (2 years old) to the preschool in front of the kindergarten. I went to the neurologist, she asked the child questions, he was silent. The question is, “Why are you silent?” I explain, "We are offended in every office: then the mouth is ripped, then the finger is crushed, then something else... there is silence." She looks at the child with a smile, "Don't worry, you will not be offended here..." and gets a MOLOTOK!!! to

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №148514
 26.01.2018
and lifhack.
1st The cheapest prostitute.
2nd Go with her to the swinger club.
Three You change her into someone’s normal wife.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №148513
 26.01.2018
> Terme on this account

Termas for this account are called "schools", and it is recommended in these Termas not to sleep on mathematics.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №148512
 26.01.2018
Look at the weather forecast.
- minus 15 for feelings minus 20.
What an unpleasant feeling...

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №148511
 26.01.2018
In every school there are children’s rights stands. And they have such rights that parents can just cry...with hotline phones. They call, they complain, they complain. And they are right!

Definitely right. It is unclear why, on the contrary, the rights of parents do not hang. Does the child have the right to know or does the parent have the right to know?

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №148510
 26.01.2018
I don’t complain about alcohol – I always accept it as it is.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №148509
 26.01.2018
X: I have three questions for you. The first, how many will eleven multiply by twelve (only in the mind)
(In a few seconds)
and : 132
x: Second, how many will eleven multiply by twelve?
(in the moment)
and : 132
X is the last. How many are eleven multiplied by twelve?
and No. 132
X: This is called caching.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №148508
 26.01.2018
Probably porn is not when the mother-in-law, forced by the baby-in-law, begins to make him pleasant, but when she is hysterical begins to read him a half-hour lecture, and then pulls for the skin and pulls to the psychologist. And the psychologist (a young busty aunt), having put his mother-in-law behind the door and left alone with his son-in-law, begins to sit on his ears, telling parables of restraint and love. Here is. And the scenes of reunion, with this psychologist and with the mother-in-law, and just with the girls seen on the street, are just the fantasies of a young man.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №148507
 26.01.2018
Cables had an evolutionary meaning when they were worn by MEN – they helped to fix shoes in the strings. If one Pompadour did not complex because of its small height, until now they would have been traditionally a male element)))

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №148506
 26.01.2018
As Gregory, make a fool pray to God.

Every day to do physical loads for two hours, and then what would be from the door to the bottom of the T-shirt. And control the diet so that a day would not be more than 1500 calories.

Milmoya, have you heard of the restoration of the body? What alternative gifted training program did you make up? And 1500 with such shock loads, what fool has advised you? Daily exercise is stressful for the body. Under stress, the body produces cortisol. And cortisol, the short-term release of which contributes to lipolysis (that is, fat burning), being increased constantly, the lipolysis slows. Sadly, but the fact: you were so foolish in vain, only complicated life to yourself.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №148505
 26.01.2018
What kind of hype? My parents are always at work, my grandmother and grandfather have enough business, I read books from 2 years old, everything is quiet. I am 3. A sister appeared. Washing, laundry and vanity. I am 8. Friends, buildings, a lake, a forest... A compulsory attribute is a sister without whom you will not be allowed to walk. I scratch the bonus for everything in a row because she’s small and can’t lie. I am 15. A friend with a boy, the sister tosses immediately. At the age of 20, I learned not to hate her. And now even friends, because we live in different cities and see very rarely. You say five...

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №148504
 26.01.2018
> who are the WASADULS who are in the garden

They are female auricles. Do you remember?

"Auriki, auriki and auriki
Men walk and women walk".

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