It was uncomfortable today.
We have one employee who often works in the headphones. You turn to her with something at work, and she looks at you with glass eyes and does not hear. You have to be distracted from your affairs, approach, attract attention to bring information to her. She also has a wonderful habit of talking to relatives and acquaintances in the hearing of a car headset. In general, a person who exists at work as if somewhat parallel to the rest, but it works normally, and in the little things we do not get people.
Today she is standing near me and speaking loudly and nervously. Again on the phone with someone tarrachtit, I think, I do my job and do not listen. Minutes after three I accidentally catch one phrase... And I understand that all this time it is me, because I am now the boss, she emotionally and in detail the results of the work done.

You say that only sex is needed.
I decided to diversify my personal life. I brought her a box of ice cream, small squares of chocolate. Well, like playing with ice... It turned out that this ice cream can cool any dust...
Until five in the morning they ate him and roasted him like horses.
An unforgettable experience.

Horoscope for today.
New interests emerge, and soon people will meet with whom you can share them. Relationships that start on this day as business or friendship will soon become romantic.
Last night I went to a business meeting with three thick bearded men.
The first thought: "What do I need?"

Life goes to earn it.

The question is, are people idiots because they are created by God, or because of evolution?

The husband enters the kitchen and hears the end of the grandmother’s monologue: and he’s crying. He cries... he cries. But he does it only when he is hungry!"
The husband, on whom lies the sacred duty to feed dogs, cats, chinchilla and fish and sometimes children in the morning, cautiously asks: "Eye, who is crying of hunger?and "
Grandmother: "Who is who? This is a smart phone!"

In the Great Choral Synagogue of St. Petersburg appeared an automaton giving blessings and receiving donations. This is on Tuesday, January 26, the edition "Fontanka.ru".

Here are strange people. When they talk about mat, they always remember women and children who are unpleasant to listen to. As if men just love to listen to their mother’s speech.
Yes, and in general: one thing is when you argue with a mate, and quite another is to talk to him.
Conversation of the kind: "A we here b.. this h.. on that e.. nae..." - human speech is little like. But by conversation it is easy to distinguish a person from a makaki.

A friend does not exist because a girl is a bitch, but because a girl really wants to be friends, and you lie everywhere with her member.

My grandfather burned up in the office today.
“I,” he said, “why did I not come to the meeting today? I had a great event - a soldier was handed over. Two months could not issue, decided what to give me a military accounting specialty. For the first (tracker) I have not worked for a thousand years, and the second, which is now a laboratory in the agricultural institute. They say "Can you train dogs? Per in the cinologues we will write?" - "I doubt, I say. - I am a candidate for flies, and I am engaged in the gynecology of cows. Thank you for not writing anything in the military obstetricians... :-)

xxx: I have recently written here "Defamation". I wrote in response that Zhi through and is written.
XXX: And then it came to me that I smoked the frog.
yyy: the master fucking)))

In fact, the ruble falls from the fact that a penny was taken out of circulation, and she kept it.

Mothers in the presence of children

My uncle drinks can use a strong word.
One day his six-and-a-half-year-old daughter (who began to speak) sent a message to the

He did not like it.

Matto I also don't like, but the claims of violins to strangers in the spirit of "they don't see what prUncessa here" resembles the claims of phytonaches, who "contrarily look at" the fat passers or the "police of fashion" that through Zadolbali dictates the whole world how to wear barefoot and shorts correctly.

The Seventh Class. Teaching Russian language. The subject is a soft sign before the voiced after the agreed. Several words are given: “piedestal”, “penyuar”, lotion, “diakon”, “protodiakon”, “family”, “nuances”. You have to make an offer with them. One boy managed to insert all the words in his proposal: "The deacon, speaking from the church pedestal, behaved so familiarily that the deacon said: 'Better would you go out in the penyuara, spraying your hair with lotion than discussing the nuances of parishioners' life.'

There was a fire in the hallway and the alarm was working. Everyone ran, almost a panic began)) and I was scared, I didn't even get out of the corridor.
- right, why stress, to run into a burning cell when you can just not get out of it. The harsh Siberian women.

From the discussions "What programming language is better":

xxx: Nails are better hit with a hammer, not, for example, passages.

A microscope of pleasure.

But then it cannot be used as a microscope.

What if you have a hundred microscopes and no hammer?

Xxx:...

xxx: Welcome to the world of web programming!)))

People often try to transfer to an infectious hospital the “home” food that a hospitalized person ate before entering the intestinal infections department, why do they do it? Interestingly simple.

An amazing story about a penis tattoo and a Mini cooper: 39-year-old German resident Andreas Muller became a participant in the action from the company "Mini Cooper". This campaign said that if you want to get a car - you just need to put the company logo on your body in a very unusual place. There were about 2,500 participants. Tattoos were everywhere - from the fifth to the ears. Our hero went further - on his unit he put the company logo. As it became known later - he won the car he had long dreamed of!



“I think there is nothing shameful here. Girls smile when I tell them about it, and about 50% want to see it. But you understand – how this “look” ends – Andreas commented in his interview.

A friend told me a story from school:



The question is, "How much will it be if you add 8 tablespoons to 7 forks?" The child replied, “7 forks and 8 tablespoons.” The teacher, clear matter, noted the answer as wrong. In his narrow world, the answer should have been “15”.



This story arose as a result of the discussion of a single formula invented by bureaucrats to assess the efficiency in which the values of different dimensions were combined. He gave an example to show that even a child understands that this cannot be done.