bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №59221
 27.01.2012
xxx to fuck! I got a resume of an accountant in EXCEL on my left mail!
xxx: is it kind of showing roughness right away??))
XXX: I wrote the answer.
Dear Lady Svetlana.
Summary in Microsoft Excel format is generally a fairy shit.
You would still paint in Paint'e.
Repeat in Word'e - potential employers will at least not immediately shrink.
YYY :D

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №59220
 27.01.2012
>>>If NAHUY were written separately, then the emphasis would be in each word: NAHUY

What other rules will you come up with, home-grown Rosenthal?
Everyone has their own rules of Russian language, their own Constitution and their own code of conduct. Are you wondering why we live this way?

P.S In the sounded case, separate writing is not regulated by emphasis.
on hook - a name group, used as a place speech: ◆ Go you on hook. “Hey, throw that iron, throw that iron, throw the particle, throw the particle, throw the particle, throw the particle, throw the particle, throw the particle, throw the particle. Or the questioning word (the same as nahuya) ◆ Nahuya you put this here?

P.S to P.S And yes, go to the fuck!! to

[ + 14 - ] Comment quote №59219
 27.01.2012
XXX: Do you remember Serena? He surprised...
We sit on the bench, pull a beer. They pass by the Uzbeks and put to the wall of sheets of 5 gipso karton, battle with each other on their barracks. Here Serega stands up from the bench, pushes the Uzbek and “chrysophy” with their legs on the leaves, they are all in the hips, the Uzbek in shock. We pulled him off and asked what kind of shit. He replied: “Suddenly it seemed that I understood the Uzbek language and I decided that they said it was the door, and they couldn’t open it, well I helped.”
XHH: Now as Uzbek understand begins, immediately sleep we put HD

[ + 42 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №59218
 26.01.2012
Astrology is not lying. This morning the astrological forecast promised me a good day financially, and I found 5 rubles on the way to work.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №59217
 26.01.2012
I told my wife that her black pants were filled, and she said, "It's not my pants, but my ass will fill me.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №59216
 26.01.2012
Yesterday the dog broke the pattern.
My brother and the dog play, the ball is thrown, while in the kitchen I put the cheese on the dog (he will sell his soul for him), he of course ran to me immediately (the dog), here the brother feeds with a toy, Archie (the dog) there, here, there, here, here, here, here, here, parents are knocking, he hears them want to run to them, and from side to side is mosquito. I thought he would stop now and the head to the evil inhabitant of the dogs would break. Fig there... He just dropped the carpet...

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №59215
 26.01.2012
sweety: we came to him...everyone’s intentions are clear! I’m like a cat already around the corners of the pitch.) he’s also seen smoking. But... we understood that we both want to eat unbearably, and this exaggerated to the side - first to be satisfied with food, and then to each other!
I decided not to go and ordered a pizza. Do you know how much I love it?! to
Valery: yes-yes, it feels like it will be "sharp"))
sweety: that’s exactly what you noticed!!!))
In general, ordered a sharp - Diablo (which)
We eat, we joke, we relax.
Then came the bed stage. They decided to break up each other first...and as it is in the position 69...
Do you understand?
Valery: of course!! That time to lose in the turn, you can and at the same time choking)))))
sweety: you are a fool! ))) In general, in a couple of minutes we both start to whisper and scream))) the pizza is sharp...short and I and he all the stuff is burning there!!! Going to the bathroom, on the road. We are spotting!! Everything burns, everything is broken, and we crack))) fun))) from the water is not easier!! to
I remember (in a stressful state) that it was cremated for burns!
as a result, we sit for minutes after 5 - both soaked on causal places with cream cold - with garlic)))) crack))) hysteria for another 15 minutes!! to

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №59214
 26.01.2012
Damn.. used in the freezer for the varnishes.. and the provider they dreamed of me (

[ + 36 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №59213
 26.01.2012
I was even born a week later than planned. Since then I have gone away – I have not managed anything.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №59212
 26.01.2012
He: A man must be smelly, strong and hairy... But I am thin.
You are a 2/3 man.
A woman must be beautiful and stupid.
She: And in what part am I a woman?
Beautiful women don’t ask such questions.

by Skitman

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №59211
 26.01.2012
X (1:32) :
of health?

by 1:34) :
A pipe of something. The pressure goes up all day and the head hurts a lot. Everything is fine at night. I don’t know what it is, but it’s been the second week.

by 1:34) :
It is connected with the sun.

X (1:35) :
How do you react to garlic?

by 1:35) :
The idiot!

[ + 63 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №59210
 26.01.2012
I don’t care about the doors you don’t hold and the hands you don’t give.
I always hold the door in front of a person, regardless of their gender, and with the same likelihood I will give a seat in the transport to both my grandmother and grandfather. Stop covering up with these outcry like "you are feminists, so do everything yourself". You are ordinary tram hams, not some super-principial lovers of gender equality. For you and the dishes is washed at home by the sky mom, and you only know how to throw away dirty socks, eat the food prepared by a woman and argue on the topic of "what babies are frogs".

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №59209
 26.01.2012
I am a writer (I am a writer)
A painting of Mozart?
Question: Ask another question
The Lions:¿

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №59208
 26.01.2012
<[Sky]Vikisa> I don’t know what about virgins... but here the virgins are a sad thing...
[Sky]Vikisa: Yes, when I was a virgin I ran away from sex with my second girlfriend for 4 months.
<[Sky]Vikisa> Acknowledgement: ahaha)))
<Gromokryak> [Sky]Vikisa: And from the first of all I escaped!

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №59207
 26.01.2012
XXX: Burning at work.

Work is cool, work is when you don’t have time to drink a cup of tea and you are all jealous that you spend most of your life on it.

We have a real fire, people are being evacuated.

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №59206
 26.01.2012
I answered:

What happens if a cat drops valerian on the bottom?

The cat will escape.

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №59205
 26.01.2012
f222a: I want you to go to bed with me under a barrel, like a plush mouse.
night_feniks: The shit of me mouse.)
f222a: Well... All the mice are like mice, and you can get rid of them.)))

[ + 33 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №59204
 26.01.2012
Hi from the 90s.
What was first, the egg or the chicken?
Answer: It was before. There is nothing to eat now.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №59203
 26.01.2012
On the website of the store kawaicat requirements to the job seeker. The first point is “absolute literacy.” It is great.

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №59202
 26.01.2012
All quests in the RPG can be marked by the following algorithm:
“Come here, I need to talk.
What happened?
-Listen, I was joking here, but the toilet paper turned out to be over, I don't even know what to do.
I feel sorry for you.
Could you get me to the toilet paper? It’s just to cross this desert, climb this mountain, kill three trolls.
“Well, I’m saving mankind from the great ancient evil that has awakened, but I’m going to take the time to get you to the toilet paper.
-Oh thank you, I would of course go out myself, but you understand - the pants are dirty, in exchange I will thank you properly
Fuck the paper.
Sorry, the toilet paper is over. But I know where to get it. You need to cut down a tree in the east, sprinkled it in the west, glued the pebbles in the north and stamped the paper in the south on the mud of the Three Dead in the night from February 28 to 29 singing the songs of the Na-Na group (trollface).
All the wicked resort with this wicked paper to the first man
Here is your paper.
Ooo thank you! I was sitting at the wall all this time, waiting for you, shake I can rub! Here, keep your reward - the megahuynik, the unnecessary armor, a bunch of which you have already found and thrown out while scratching this scratch paper..."

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